Install the app
How to install the app on iOS

Follow along with the video below to see how to install our site as a web app on your home screen.

Note: This feature may not be available in some browsers.

 

Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

Today is world suicide prevention day

Cr-wXYpWYAAWS68.jpg


This thread is that ladder :)
 
The Esk said:
Today is world suicide prevention day

Cr-wXYpWYAAWS68.jpg


This thread is that ladder :)
Click to expand...
That reminds me of a story shared in The West Wing. " A guy falls down a hole and is in despair because he can't see a way out. His friend passes buy and the guy in the hole shouts out to him, upon hearing him and seeing the state he's in the friend jumps down the hole too. " Why did you do that" says the guy in the hole in further despair " Now we're both stuck in the hole" .
The friend says " Yeah , but I've been here before and know the way out" .

A bit twee maybe, but one of the strengths of this thread is the advice given from their own experience by those who've " been here before and know the way out".
 
Ilyas Mohamed said:
Saw GOT post this on twitter the other day so I thought I'd give this a go. I don't know what to live for anymore. I don't see a point or purpose in life. The little things don't get me happy anymore. Nothing seems to make my day or give me a reason to go on.

I injured my back a couple months back and it just seems like everything has gone downhill from there. I can't help it anymore. I can't exercise to cope with my stress because of the injury and my weight has ballooned from 84kg to 100kg. This hurts me a lot more because I worked so hard to get down to 84kg from 145kg and now it seems like alll my effort has gone down the drain. Started losing my hair as well which bugs me so much more than it should but I just can't deal with going bald now. I'm only 21 and going bald for me would again be disastrous. I started to care about my personal image when i started losing weight so hair became an important aspect and for the first time in my life at the age of 21, I started grooming daily and it became a much larger part of me than I ever thought it would. So losing my hair now is soul crushing.

My family life is a mess. My mum's religious and I personally don't believe. I'm an atheist (not one of those psycho [Poor language removed] that tells everyone that god isn't real every time they meet them) but it's hard when you're constantly being barraged by all these negative comments about your beliefs and I still haven't come out to the rest of my family and to all my friends and at this point, it's not gonna happen.

I don't find the joy in life anymore. The little things like being able to listen to music and go on a short walk made me so happy in the past but now I can't even enjoy those things without being in pain. The hair loss makes me scared to go out because I'm too self-conscious about my hair to deal with everyone staring at me. I can't go to the gym and lift weights for hours like I used to. I can't hit the bench or do my T-bar rows or any other exercise that made me say "you have a purpose today". My life was mundane in that sense but I can't explain how happy I was because to quote Oasis, "The little things, they make me so happy."

Right now I'm reduced to doing physio exercises which make me feel like an incompetent paraplegic fuckwit. These exercises are so simple it boggles my mind how I can't do them pain free. And just a few months back I was exercising a minimum of 10 times a week. Fasted cardio and weight training later in the day. Now I can't even walk pain-free let alone anything else.

I can't do those little things anymore. I also see my friends enjoying their life, studying and working or being conscripted (side note there's conscription in my country) and now I can't do any of those things as well. I am not conscripted because of my back injury and according to the MD there, I might need surgery.

Surgery doesn't scare me. I actually look forward to it if it means I get back to 100%. Right now I don't even have a [Poor language removed] letter for the appointment, I am simply told to wait for the [Poor language removed] LETTER for an appointment date. So right now my life is in absolute limbo and I can't do anything right now. The pain doesn't help as well.

Call me stubborn but I hate to rely on painkillers. I don't wanna create a dependency on those drugs. Doc also prescribed me tranxene a few months back but that does [Poor language removed] all for my mood. Also didn't use it that much either because the effects were minuscule at best. Right now, typing this out is kinda cathartic. Even if it's just a little.

Thanks to anyone who bothered to read this and further thanks to anyone who bothers to reply.
Click to expand...
That's a very brave post. Very brave.
Not easy to talk about stuff like that.
The advice about seeing your GP is very good. I urge you to do it if you haven't already.
Counselling may be one route to salvation.
I thought of mindfulness when I read about watching friends enjoying life and the former pleasures of music no longer having the same value for you. You'll find lots of stuff on the Web if you search for mindfulness - including via the NHS.
But each person with difficulties like yours will have slightly different needs. So counselling, therapy, prescribed drugs or mindfulness.....could be any of those or a combination.
Key thing is to keep trying.....things will get better if you don't give into despair.
Keep posting. Keep hoping. Let us all know how you are doing. There will be many posters and lurkers who will be interested.
You are most definitely not alone
 
Turfman said:
I have always used this forum when I am down, just reading it seems to help somehow. I rarely feel I have anything to contribute that has not been touched on before.
But recently something occurred to me, I have noticed that when I wake up I am usually fairly upbeat and looking forward to the day. But the constant barrage of crap and BS that rains down on the world has me totally beat by the end of the day, and I don't mean it is all directed toward myself, If I see a co-worker getting stepped on by a manager it gets me down, some evil event in the world will drive me further down and these will accumulate over time.
Except those rare golden days when I see some random act of kindness, read some feel good story online and somehow the world does not seem so bad. There is one co-worker, bless him, that says right to my face on those rare days when our schedules align, "my challenge is to make you laugh today"
I am sure that he is unaware how much good he does, (he acts the same with most everyone). What I am trying to get to is this, if you can make someone smile, go for it. You may never know the effect it may have but it won't be wasted Trust me!
Click to expand...

Love this post as its so true. Everyone should aim to either help/ make someone laugh each day it makes you feel good. Have had numerous bad times over the last six/seven years, financial, relationship etc but keeping a positivity ( not easy!!) does help. Lucky that I teach primary kids so lots of opprtunities for those feel good factors as I help kids all day and it is a good laugh. Distracts me totally from the real world . I always try and spot colleagues who are struggling with the stress of the job to cheer them up and let them know they are not alone.
 

went home for a couple of hours today. it went ok. I managed the physical things alright if I took my time, climbing the stairs getting to the kitchen and garden etc. need a chair in the kitchen as I couldn't stand up too long. the only problem I found was a mental one. being in here for the weekend has been like a mini holiday, different scenery, different people, waited on etc and of course my " discomforts " being greatly eased. being at home again was like back to the monotony just hanging around waiting again, but at least this time I won't have the problems I had before coming here, that's a bonus isn't it and it will free this bed up for someone who really needs it.
take care all.:D
 
wbn61 said:
went home for a couple of hours today. it went ok. I managed the physical things alright if I took my time, climbing the stairs getting to the kitchen and garden etc. need a chair in the kitchen as I couldn't stand up too long. the only problem I found was a mental one. being in here for the weekend has been like a mini holiday, different scenery, different people, waited on etc and of course my " discomforts " being greatly eased. being at home again was like back to the monotony just hanging around waiting again, but at least this time I won't have the problems I had before coming here, that's a bonus isn't it and it will free this bed up for someone who really needs it.
take care all.:D
Click to expand...


The match tomorrow hopefully is something to look forward too ;)
 

wbn61 said:
couldn't go home today, more assessment needed. hopefully tomorrow or more likely wed they say. wife got a wheelchair today so hopefully should be able to get a few days out when she's off work. getting ready for my tea now, then try to sort a stream out for the game later.
take care everyone:D.
Click to expand...
Well, pace yourself and save your strength for those days when you can get out.

I can't speak for others but when I read your words I see a strong bloke battling away against a very 'non level' playing field. I'm not seeing a bloke in a wheelchair so keep fighting the good fight and keep your mind sharp mate. We're all in your corner!
 
JelavicBrate2 said:
My parents are ex yugoslavia refugees from just before the war I think I've struggled with the emotional affect ever since, I think it's understood a lot more in other places but it's hard when brought up with such a negative experience of life to remain positive attitude.
Click to expand...


Where do you live mate, there may be a Yugoslavian ex pat community in the area thay you live in ?.
They almost certainly could help you find someone to talk to and help you. I'm sure you wouldn't be the only one to experience feelings like this, which I may add, are only natural given the circumstances
 

Welcome

Join Grand Old Team to get involved in the Everton discussion. Signing up is quick, easy, and completely free.

Register
Back
Top