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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

I don't know what to say...
But my mom and my son's visit me on Christmas is cancelled now. They refused to had a UK visa. Just got the answer.
Can't believe...
P.S. This terrible news came just a few days after I been told my wife won't ever join me here.
That's like the end for me.
Sorry to hear that. That must be heart breaking..

Hope you are doing ok mate..
 
going to my gp today. Have a complete sense of utter worthlessness due to my work responsibilities being taken away, no career path and nothing to aim for is killing me. Have a 5month old son and can barely look him in the eye due to feeling like a failure. Cant motivate myself to get up in the morning staying up late freaking out. Nasty feeling. Hoping to get signed off for a few weeks to sort my head but have no idea what to say and dreading my gp telling me to man up. Never met her before.
 
going to my gp today. Have a complete sense of utter worthlessness due to my work responsibilities being taken away, no career path and nothing to aim for is killing me. Have a 5month old son and can barely look him in the eye due to feeling like a failure. Cant motivate myself to get up in the morning staying up late freaking out. Nasty feeling. Hoping to get signed off for a few weeks to sort my head but have no idea what to say and dreading my gp telling me to man up. Never met her before.
You certainly aren't alone mate. I am back to my gp next week 3rd time in 2 years for crippling anxiety. Each time I have been told to take meds and refused thinking it was weak to give in. Now I am going to be asking for them. I had cbt (which does help) and the therapist gave me an analogy of 'if your arm was broke would you let a doctor treat you?' I laughed it off at the time but as my anxiety has peaked again I am now accepting I need meds for my sake and that of my wife and child. It's not weak to say you need help. I have always considered myself a 'man' , I do a masculine job , box, weightlift, all that manly crap but I have accepted I am not well mentally. Thinking I was weak because of this just made me worse.
You know your own mind, if you are not right then push this with the GP, see if you can be offered cbt if she doesn't think you need meds as yet. As lots of people point out on here, excercise really helps the mind. I do loads, unfortunately of late it's not enough.
Good luck mate
 

going to my gp today. Have a complete sense of utter worthlessness due to my work responsibilities being taken away, no career path and nothing to aim for is killing me. Have a 5month old son and can barely look him in the eye due to feeling like a failure. Cant motivate myself to get up in the morning staying up late freaking out. Nasty feeling. Hoping to get signed off for a few weeks to sort my head but have no idea what to say and dreading my gp telling me to man up. Never met her before.
she won't tell you to man up . If she does she shouldn't be in that job . Good luck
 
You certainly aren't alone mate. I am back to my gp next week 3rd time in 2 years for crippling anxiety. Each time I have been told to take meds and refused thinking it was weak to give in. Now I am going to be asking for them. I had cbt (which does help) and the therapist gave me an analogy of 'if your arm was broke would you let a doctor treat you?' I laughed it off at the time but as my anxiety has peaked again I am now accepting I need meds for my sake and that of my wife and child. It's not weak to say you need help. I have always considered myself a 'man' , I do a masculine job , box, weightlift, all that manly crap but I have accepted I am not well mentally. Thinking I was weak because of this just made me worse.
You know your own mind, if you are not right then push this with the GP, see if you can be offered cbt if she doesn't think you need meds as yet. As lots of people point out on here, excercise really helps the mind. I do loads, unfortunately of late it's not enough.
Good luck mate

I wont take meds ( I say that now) but I have stopped exercising, lost confidence, had an anxiety attack the other day. Its just not me at all. Its worrying so I hoping to take some time out and get my head right. Never been thru this before tbh and with a new born child I feel I'm letting him down which makes it all the worse.
 
I wont take meds ( I say that now) but I have stopped exercising, lost confidence, had an anxiety attack the other day. Its just not me at all. Its worrying so I hoping to take some time out and get my head right. Never been thru this before tbh and with a new born child I feel I'm letting him down which makes it all the worse.
mine started with my lad being born (he's now 5) and he was a terrible sleeper from day 1. I swore I would never turn to meds but needs must. I know exactly how you feel. Feel free to pm me
 
going to my gp today. Have a complete sense of utter worthlessness due to my work responsibilities being taken away, no career path and nothing to aim for is killing me. Have a 5month old son and can barely look him in the eye due to feeling like a failure. Cant motivate myself to get up in the morning staying up late freaking out. Nasty feeling. Hoping to get signed off for a few weeks to sort my head but have no idea what to say and dreading my gp telling me to man up. Never met her before.
mate, one thing i will say to you.

you won't be anything less than your son's hero in his eyes as he grows up, you could be the most horrible person and he will still grow up looking up to you.

So remember that, whenever you are feeling the way you are, at least there is your 5 month old best mate, the one who will look up to you and learn from you. You are his superhero mate, so never leave yourself to think otherwise.
 
mate, one thing i will say to you.

you won't be anything less than your son's hero in his eyes as he grows up, you could be the most horrible person and he will still grow up looking up to you.

So remember that, whenever you are feeling the way you are, at least there is your 5 month old best mate, the one who will look up to you and learn from you. You are his superhero mate, so never leave yourself to think otherwise.
Really nice words mate thanks
 

All countries are like that I've been kept in airports in the the ex yugoslavia because of views my uncle expressed in the 70s during communism, before I was even born. In fact in the summer 2014 during the height of my depression I was dragged of a tourist bus full of Brits of Germans by the Montenegrin Police for allegedly posing a threat to their stability, when all I was looking for is a cheap bevy and maybe chat up a few nice birds. All countries are strict now.
With the greatest of respect, and not meaning to ignore your experiences, I would disagree that all countries are like that. I've lived and worked in about 15 different countries, and travelled to over 60. In very few places have I been met with opposition to me simply entering the country on holiday, and I've never been made to feel that I wasn't welcome or contributing in the countries I worked in.
 
going to my gp today. Have a complete sense of utter worthlessness due to my work responsibilities being taken away, no career path and nothing to aim for is killing me. Have a 5month old son and can barely look him in the eye due to feeling like a failure. Cant motivate myself to get up in the morning staying up late freaking out. Nasty feeling. Hoping to get signed off for a few weeks to sort my head but have no idea what to say and dreading my gp telling me to man up. Never met her before.

No GP would tell you to "man up" so please don't let that deter you. You're doing the right thing by going to your GP and asking for help, as I'm sure all of us on this thread have hit those crunch points when it's all too much (or not enough), and not just once or twice. And at those times it's really hard to stop your brain from freaking you out (the late night comment you made rang true with me).

Without wanting to sound cheesy, you are not worthless, we all positively affect other's lives around us, in ways we don't even know. I do hope you are able to find some way to enjoy having a young baby rather than feeling bad in front of him- get those baby cuddles in (and yes, it is manly to acknowledge that babies are cuddly, fabulous sources of unconditional love).

Hope it goes well at the GPs x
 
I wont take meds ( I say that now) but I have stopped exercising, lost confidence, had an anxiety attack the other day. Its just not me at all. Its worrying so I hoping to take some time out and get my head right. Never been thru this before tbh and with a new born child I feel I'm letting him down which makes it all the worse.


First steps are admitting your not well mate, which you've done. Be totally honest with your GP, the more info they have, the more they can help you.

Don't dismiss meds, look at them as a tool to getting yourself better. You don't have to take them forever, just until your back on an even keel and feeling better again.

Your head can break, same as any other part of your body, yet for some reason we feel we need to hide it. Why ?.

There's people out there that want to and can help you, let them, there's no shame in it.

I can guarantee amongst your circle of family, friends and work colleagues, at least one of them is taking meds for either anxiety / depression and is keeping it secret.

You don't have anything to be ashamed of at all x
 

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