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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

I'm on the sick until January, I spoke to occupational health and she said that I need to work on my social anxiety and be ready to come back in the new year for a fresh start. Like it's that easy.

I am at a point where I don't know what's to do for the best, I feel the job is a problem currently and I believe having that on the horizon all the time is preventing me from moving on. The problem is, will I regret quitting in the future, is it just my depression making me feel like this.

I can see how disappointed the other half looks when I mention quitting because the alternatives are just as crap and at least the money is better in this job. I just don't know at the moment.

Being off isn't helping at all because I'm just constantly thinking about going back and the anxiety it caused this time. Feeling a bit lost at the moment.

I was off sick for over two years due to work related stuff. I used to count the days down to my occy health apppointments with dread, even though the woman who looked after me was brilliant and very supportive. I just didn't want to be anywhere near my workplace at all. I used to post my sick notes too, rather than have to face going in and seeing people. When I eventually resigned I felt like a weight had been lifted, even though I no longer had a job.
The damage had been done by then and my anxiety problems where deep rooted and I fear here for life.

There lies the danger. The longer the situation goes on with you and work, it's just making things worse for you. You'll reach a point where you won't be able to go back even if you wanted to, as you'll be that unwell.

If work is making you ill and this unhappy, you've got to decide health or wealth mate. I'm not trying to be preachy, but if it's your job that's a major cause of all this, then you know what the answer is.

Don't make the same mistake I made mate x
 
I was off sick for over two years due to work related stuff. I used to count the days down to my occy health apppointments with dread, even though the woman who looked after me was brilliant and very supportive. I just didn't want to be anywhere near my workplace at all. I used to post my sick notes too, rather than have to face going in and seeing people. When I eventually resigned I felt like a weight had been lifted, even though I no longer had a job.
The damage had been done by then and my anxiety problems where deep rooted and I fear here for life.

There lies the danger. The longer the situation goes on with you and work, it's just making things worse for you. You'll reach a point where you won't be able to go back even if you wanted to, as you'll be that unwell.

If work is making you ill and this unhappy, you've got to decide health or wealth mate. I'm not trying to be preachy, but if it's your job that's a major cause of all this, then you know what the answer is.

Don't make the same mistake I made mate x

Worth baring in mind. I'm prepared to give it another go after christmas, if it doesn't work out then alternatives need to be looked at.
 
Sitting in work - head feels absolutely full to the brim and I feel as if there's so much going on but really I am not thinking on anything at all.

Everything is fuzzy... I cant focus. When someone is talking to me I feel like nothing is going in. Memory is a mess too...

Anyone had this? Any advice?
 
Sitting in work - head feels absolutely full to the brim and I feel as if there's so much going on but really I am not thinking on anything at all.

Everything is fuzzy... I cant focus. When someone is talking to me I feel like nothing is going in. Memory is a mess too...

Anyone had this? Any advice?
i have this every day and I don't even work . Which In a way can be worse as I have more time to have all manners of pointless crap run through my mind and make matters worse . It's crap and I feel your pain mate
 
i have this every day and I don't even work . Which In a way can be worse as I have more time to have all manners of pointless crap run through my mind and make matters worse . It's crap and I feel your pain mate
It's brutal on my days off - I seem to have lost motivation for life in general and getting out of bed is a mission, just don't get it.

Hows your memory? I'll plan to do something and totally forget most of the time.

ATM it feels like something is pushing down on the top of my head constantly and I can't get rid of it.
 

Despite deciding to leave work weeks ago. Despite deciding not to go through the process. I'm now been informed that nothing can be decided until end of January about my future.

What date I can leave. What pay off lm getting.

Felt myself falling yesterday and it ruined my day. Today I just feel like crawling into bed and staying there. It's beyond disgusting treating staff this way, but guess I'm not surprised.

I can leave on my terms for 8k less than orgoanlly planned and by christ I'm tempted as terrified of heading down a dark path. Yet, it is possible I accept the 8k less and then the others leaving getting the better package in janauary . Speaking to the union but not expecting much.
 
Despite deciding to leave work weeks ago. Despite deciding not to go through the process. I'm now been informed that nothing can be decided until end of January about my future.

What date I can leave. What pay off lm getting.

Felt myself falling yesterday and it ruined my day. Today I just feel like crawling into bed and staying there. It's beyond disgusting treating staff this way, but guess I'm not surprised.

I can leave on my terms for 8k less than orgoanlly planned and by christ I'm tempted as terrified of heading down a dark path. Yet, it is possible I accept the 8k less and then the others leaving getting the better package in janauary . Speaking to the union but not expecting much.
Just think about the cushion the £8k will give you whilst your new business is starting up mate. Don't make a rash decision. If you are in a consultation period, you are better off just sitting it out for now. I know it's frustrating and from what you've said your firm have done this several times, but imagine someone said you could have £8k for a month's work, you'd take it. All the best.
 
Just think about the cushion the £8k will give you whilst your new business is starting up mate. Don't make a rash decision. If you are in a consultation period, you are better off just sitting it out for now. I know it's frustrating and from what you've said your firm have done this several times, but imagine someone said you could have £8k for a month's work, you'd take it. All the best.

Cheers. I guess I just want to start the whole business and was planing on it all being sorted for April. Worst case is I get the 8k less anyway but still get to leave on the date I want.

Nothing is ever easy and the Mrs has just finished 6 weeks therapy and guess I'm worried me being down will affect her.

I've been so positive up to this point and the business was registered last week with companies house. I know the time will come when I'm back in control but that feels miles away at the moment
 
It's brutal on my days off - I seem to have lost motivation for life in general and getting out of bed is a mission, just don't get it.

Hows your memory? I'll plan to do something and totally forget most of the time.

ATM it feels like something is pushing down on the top of my head constantly and I can't get rid of it.


I've had that most of my adult life: constant head pressure. It's like a physical depression of the skull, which is debilitating enough to make you not arsed to do anything, and it's hard to focus on things which require more effort than surfing internet.

I've searched far and wide for diagnosis and treatment, and while it's not gone away it's got better. The symptoms are too vague for a Doctor to really be able to help, and I haven't gone the (mental illness) depression route as I've never had the mental symptoms that typically go with that (sadness, negativity etc).

In short, this is what I've tried and how it helped. Listing all this makes me sound like a right hypochondriac but I'm the opposite of one, ignored all this for many years but it was just making me miserable & frustrated (but again, not in the depressive sense). Once I hit 30 I finally decided to manage my health properly. It's a long game with no real end in sight, and there's no magic fix from the Docs, you have to find your own way mostly. But you can improve your condition.


test: allergy check
result: highly allergic to dust & all the seasonal fluff, adds to the feeling of lethargy/exhaustion/head-pressure
treatment: keep home relatively (not obsessively) clean, nose-op to get rid of swollen canal skin/adenoids, take 1x levo-cetirizine (just take one for those long day outs) and also wear a paper mask over mouth/nose before going out all day in the Spring/Summer. Before I didn't do either and my eyes would be teary, my nose blocked and my head swimming. I used to have to blow my nose a ridiculous amount every day, it felt like I lost actual bodyweight the amount of slime that regularly came out. Thankfully this has all gotten much less now.
future treatment: hyposensitization therapy to hopefully reduce my quite insanely high sensitivity.

test
: is that pain in my teeth/gums an issue?
result: yeah it is! Dentist found a rotten canal
treatment: so this is the magic fix for the constant head pressure? nope...but it fixed tooth ache. Now I rinse once or twice a week with 3% hydrogen peroxide to keep any fledgling infections at bay.
future treatment: who knows if my defunct wisdom teeth are causing head pressure? maybe...maybe i should get them removed.

test
: am i even sleeping decent?
result: nope...the allergies keeping my nose blocked, plus my asthma always waking me up, put paid to that.
treatment: finally found an asthma med which controlled the disease (Viani in my case), also discovered Breathe Right Extra nosestrips which open up my nose-canals so I can breathe better at night. Plus the above-mentioned allergy controls and now I sleep better.
discontinued treatment: i tried air moisture machines and fancy dust-catcher devices but both did nothing for me, even if they had measurable effects (had a moisture/dust sensor to hand).

test: do i have some terrible unknown disease? blood test to find out...
result: yes and no...turns out i have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. It's an auto-immune disease which, much like allergies, has the brain sending wrong signals. In this case my thyroid gland is slowly being eaten away. Symptoms are lethargy/exhaustion/head-pressure.
treatment: i was convinced this was the magic fix that would suddenly make me feel like a god, but alas no. I'm talking L-thyroxin and my ratings have normalised, but I genuinely feel not a jot of difference. But apparently I have to keep taking them as otherwise my thyroid gland will start getting eaten away again and eventually I'll feel the negative results of this.

test: am i eating right, keeping fit and active?
result: yes and no...i'm overweight by a good 15kg so that deffo needs sorting. I don't play football/tennis anymore and cycle less so that's not great either, plus I spend far too much time in front of a computer screen (for work and play). But I still feel relatively fit and strong, tho' I shouldn't fool myself.
future treatment: Weightwatchers genuinely works, it's the only one that does as long as you exactly stick to it. Also get back to playing some sports and cycling, ffs. And try to limit screen time.

potential future tests: chiari malformation & labyrinthitis are two conditions which match with constant head pressure (and tinnitus, which i also constantly have tho' I blame that on years of raving, haha). I've never had a head scan (CT or MRI) so perhaps something may show...or perhaps not. I'm privately health-insured and would have to pay for this myself (the paradox of compulsory health insurance in Germany, if you go private to save money you have to pay loads yourself).


Regarding memory, I used to smoke green...almost daily. Haven't in about 10 years (tho' still have an annual LSD dabble). Also drink much less alcohol than I used to. I think improving short-term memory is helped by keeping the head clean, and doing such fun druggy things only in very occasional moderation. Obviously your short-term memory will also be helped by finding out and fixing your physical issues and thus sleeping better...it helped me in that way too.


After all this, I still have constant head pressure and still my motivation/energy/organisation is not optimal. But it's all deffo got better...significantly better...since I've started managing how I feel. 8 years of managing now. My life itself has improved as a result: much less financial chaos, much less home chaos, more enthusiasm for life and more focus in planning for things. My relationships with my friends, family & colleagues has always been good, that never really needed any treatment (also why I discounted mental illness).

I bet if it was possible to compare head-pressure/lethargy feels from before I started working on these things (circa 2008) and right now, then there'd be a big difference...so well worth the effort.


TL/DR...you have to begin the long game of figuring out what's wrong and then how to fix it...don't ignore it...good luck :cheers:
 
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It's brutal on my days off - I seem to have lost motivation for life in general and getting out of bed is a mission, just don't get it.

Hows your memory? I'll plan to do something and totally forget most of the time.

ATM it feels like something is pushing down on the top of my head constantly and I can't get rid of it.
My memory is terrible but I end up writing everything down so I don't forget which sets off OCD . It's a vicious circle mate
 

Sitting in work - head feels absolutely full to the brim and I feel as if there's so much going on but really I am not thinking on anything at all.

Everything is fuzzy... I cant focus. When someone is talking to me I feel like nothing is going in. Memory is a mess too...

Anyone had this? Any advice?

i have this every day and I don't even work . Which In a way can be worse as I have more time to have all manners of pointless crap run through my mind and make matters worse . It's crap and I feel your pain mate

There is a generally unrecognised condition known as " Brain Fog ", which some in the medical profession are now starting to acknowledge is real. It's a bit like M.E. in that a lot of Doctors refuse to acknowledge it as a real condition.

At the height of my problems I suffered from what you both described terribly. I also suffered badly with tinnitus at the same time. I felt like my head was full of cotton wool and my memory / attention span was shot to bits. Mine was at its worst in the morning and lasted until about midday before my head cleared. Hangovers made it measurably worse too. I was like a zombie in the mornings, which is difficult with kids !!!!

My GP dismissed both the "brain fog " and tinnitus as anything at all. In other words he didn't know what it was or what to do about it.

From my own research "brain fog " is extremely common in people with depression / anxiety problems, but they don't know why or what causes it.

If you google " Brain Fog " there's a load of stuff on it, which may help you understand it better. There's also a Doctor in America who is really starting to take an interest in it and is doing research ( I think his stuff is in page one, when you google it ).

Also the NHS site - MentalHeath,org has a thread on it and a whole load of posters who suffer from it.

@dholliday makes some good points there too, but from what you both describe, it sounds like " Brain fog ".

Mine went slowly as the depression eased off, although it comes back big time with a hangover- which leads me to think it's the chemicals in your brain sing out of kilter.

Hope this helps x
 
There is a generally unrecognised condition known as " Brain Fog ", which some in the medical profession are now starting to acknowledge is real. It's a bit like M.E. in that a lot of Doctors refuse to acknowledge it as a real condition.

At the height of my problems I suffered from what you both described terribly. I also suffered badly with tinnitus at the same time. I felt like my head was full of cotton wool and my memory / attention span was shot to bits. Mine was at its worst in the morning and lasted until about midday before my head cleared. Hangovers made it measurably worse too. I was like a zombie in the mornings, which is difficult with kids !!!!

My GP dismissed both the "brain fog " and tinnitus as anything at all. In other words he didn't know what it was or what to do about it.

From my own research "brain fog " is extremely common in people with depression / anxiety problems, but they don't know why or what causes it.

If you google " Brain Fog " there's a load of stuff on it, which may help you understand it better. There's also a Doctor in America who is really starting to take an interest in it and is doing research ( I think his stuff is in page one, when you google it ).

Also the NHS site - MentalHeath,org has a thread on it and a whole load of posters who suffer from it.

@dholliday makes some good points there too, but from what you both describe, it sounds like " Brain fog ".

Mine went slowly as the depression eased off, although it comes back big time with a hangover- which leads me to think it's the chemicals in your brain sing out of kilter.

Hope this helps x

Cheers for this pal just looking up on it now. Scary how accurate it sounds!

I've had that most of my adult life: constant head pressure. It's like a physical depression of the skull, which is debilitating enough to make you not arsed to do anything, and it's hard to focus on things which require more effort than surfing internet.

I've searched far and wide for diagnosis and treatment, and while it's not gone away it's got better. The symptoms are too vague for a Doctor to really be able to help, and I haven't gone the (mental illness) depression route as I've never had the mental symptoms that typically go with that (sadness, negativity etc).

In short, this is what I've tried and how it helped. Listing all this makes me sound like a right hypochondriac but I'm the opposite of one, ignored all this for many years but it was just making me miserable & frustrated (but again, not in the depressive sense). Once I hit 30 I finally decided to manage my health properly. It's a long game with no real end in sight, and there's no magic fix from the Docs, you have to find your own way mostly. But you can improve your condition.


test: allergy check
result: highly allergic to dust & all the seasonal fluff, adds to the feeling of lethargy/exhaustion/head-pressure
treatment: keep home relatively (not obsessively) clean, nose-op to get rid of swollen canal skin/adenoids, take 1x levo-cetirizine (just take one for those long day outs) and also wear a paper mask over mouth/nose before going out all day in the Spring/Summer. Before I didn't do either and my eyes would be teary, my nose blocked and my head swimming. I used to have to blow my nose a ridiculous amount every day, it felt like I lost actual bodyweight the amount of slime that regularly came out. Thankfully this has all gotten much less now.
future treatment: hyposensitization therapy to hopefully reduce my quite insanely high sensitivity.

test
: is that pain in my teeth/gums an issue?
result: yeah it is! Dentist found a rotten canal
treatment: so this is the magic fix for the constant head pressure? nope...but it fixed tooth ache. Now I rinse once or twice a week with 3% hydrogen peroxide to keep any fledgling infections at bay.
future treatment: who knows if my defunct wisdom teeth are causing head pressure? maybe...maybe i should get them removed.

test
: am i even sleeping decent?
result: nope...the allergies keeping my nose blocked, plus my asthma always waking me up, put paid to that.
treatment: finally found an asthma med which controlled the disease (Viani in my case), also discovered Breathe Right Extra nosestrips which open up my nose-canals so I can breathe better at night. Plus the above-mentioned allergy controls and now I sleep better.
discontinued treatment: i tried air moisture machines and fancy dust-catcher devices but both did nothing for me, even if they had measurable effects (had a moisture/dust sensor to hand).

test: do i have some terrible unknown disease? blood test to find out...
result: yes and no...turns out i have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. It's an auto-immune disease which, much like allergies, has the brain sending wrong signals. In this case my thyroid gland is slowly being eaten away. Symptoms are lethargy/exhaustion/head-pressure.
treatment: i was convinced this was the magic fix that would suddenly make me feel like a god, but alas no. I'm talking L-thyroxin and my ratings have normalised, but I genuinely feel not a jot of difference. But apparently I have to keep taking them as otherwise my thyroid gland will start getting eaten away again and eventually I'll feel the negative results of this.

test: am i eating right, keeping fit and active?
result: yes and no...i'm overweight by a good 15kg so that deffo needs sorting. I don't play football/tennis anymore and cycle less so that's not great either, plus I spend far too much time in front of a computer screen (for work and play). But I still feel relatively fit and strong, tho' I shouldn't fool myself.
future treatment: Weightwatchers genuinely works, it's the only one that does as long as you exactly stick to it. Also get back to playing some sports and cycling, ffs. And try to limit screen time.

potential future tests: chiari malformation & labyrinthitis are two conditions which match with constant head pressure (and tinnitus, which i also constantly have tho' I blame that on years of raving, haha). I've never had a head scan (CT or MRI) so perhaps something may show...or perhaps not. I'm privately health-insured and would have to pay for this myself (the paradox of compulsory health insurance in Germany, if you go private to save money you have to pay loads yourself).


Regarding memory, I used to smoke green...almost daily. Haven't in about 10 years (tho' still have an annual LSD dabble). Also drink much less alcohol than I used to. I think improving short-term memory is helped by keeping the head clean, and doing such fun druggy things only in very occasional moderation. Obviously your short-term memory will also be helped by finding out and fixing your physical issues and thus sleeping better...it helped me in that way too.


After all this, I still have constant head pressure and still my motivation/energy/organisation is not optimal. But it's all deffo got better...significantly better...since I've started managing how I feel. 8 years of managing now. My life itself has improved as a result: much less financial chaos, much less home chaos, more enthusiasm for life and more focus in planning for things. My relationships with my friends, family & colleagues has always been good, that never really needed any treatment (also why I discounted mental illness).

I bet if it was possible to compare head-pressure/lethargy feels from before I started working on these things (circa 2008) and right now, then there'd be a big difference...so well worth the effort.


TL/DR...you have to begin the long game of figuring out what's wrong and then how to fix it...don't ignore it...good luck :cheers:

Appreciate this, sounds like a pain in the arse trying to get to the bottom of it eh?

Will deffo go the doctors and take your advice, thank you.
 
Sitting in work - head feels absolutely full to the brim and I feel as if there's so much going on but really I am not thinking on anything at all.

Everything is fuzzy... I cant focus. When someone is talking to me I feel like nothing is going in. Memory is a mess too...

Anyone had this? Any advice?

I've been developing this over the past year, it's horrid isn't it, i can't even concentrate whilst talking to friends anymore.. As mentioned I think it's called brain fog. Apparently a healthy diet helps it greatly. you could also try meditating too.
 
I've been developing this over the past year, it's horrid isn't it, i can't even concentrate whilst talking to friends anymore.. As mentioned I think it's called brain fog. Apparently a healthy diet helps it greatly. you could also try meditating too.

Diet is a big part - Omega 3, Vitamin B12 etc. There's loads of stuff out there that can hopefully help x
 
Cheers. I guess I just want to start the whole business and was planing on it all being sorted for April. Worst case is I get the 8k less anyway but still get to leave on the date I want.

Nothing is ever easy and the Mrs has just finished 6 weeks therapy and guess I'm worried me being down will affect her.

I've been so positive up to this point and the business was registered last week with companies house. I know the time will come when I'm back in control but that feels miles away at the moment
Have they said why things can't be moved on quickly? It's usually HR dragging their feet for no apparent reason. Keep on at them, they'll get fed up of you and do something eventually. Also, what @hallamblue said. It's £8k for an extra month. Do you have leave you need to take before you leave- that could bring forward your leaving date.
 

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