Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[EFCPaul]

Just an update.

Been back to the doctor today as planned. He's increased my citalopram to 40mg.

It's difficult to describe the way I'm feeling currently. I have points in the day were I feel quite positive but then for no particular reason I start to feel anxious and low. Its odd, I was making tea earlier and I suddenly had this rush of anxiety like I thought something bad was going to happen. I then had to remind myself that there was nothing for me to worry about.

I now have 2 weeks annual leave so I feel like I should be in a really good mood but I'm not. Maybe I'll feel a bit better in a few days when I've had chase to unwind.

Anyway. The doctor wants me to have a blood test to check for vitamin levels and see him again in a month.

You'll always be put of whack for a few days after starting a new dosage mate, it happened to me a few months ago. Just try to have an easy few days, it's good that you're off work because it means you can spend your time how you want too and not be forced into stressful situations.. It's so important to be taking it easy whilst you're brain is trying equilibrise with a new medication. Try not to lock yourself in your house though because isolating yourself is just as bad, being alone with your thoughts currently isn't something you'll enjoy. Try to get out and let your hair down a but, even if it's just a nice walk in the fresh summer air for an hour or so every night.

Stay strong mate and don't worry, the bad episodes are horrible experiences, I know that first hand but they do pass. You do end up feeling better.

 

[efcforever]

Have you started the new dose Citalopram

If so, the anxiety " rushes " could be your body adjusting to the increased dosage.

Use your two weeks to do things that you really enjoy doing, catch up with mates, go to the gym and just generally try not think of anything too hard

Went up to 30 from 20 a couple of weeks ago. I'm going to start on 40mg in the morning.

 

[efcforever]

Thanks as always for the support everyone. I'm so glad that this thread is here.

I've no major plans for my time off but I'm just going to take it easy. Spend time with my daughter, walk the dog and planning to see some old work mates next week.

 

[COYBL25]

Went up to 30 from 20 a couple of weeks ago. I'm going to start on 40mg in the morning.

That could be what's giving you the wobbles x

 

[Deleted member 28206]

Thanks as always for the support everyone. I'm so glad that this thread is here.

I've no major plans for my time off but I'm just going to take it easy. Spend time with my daughter, walk the dog and planning to see some old work mates next week.

I promise you 100% you'll be surprised at just how much that helps. Come back to me in a week and tell me how you are getting on

 

[efcforever]

That could be what's giving you the wobbles x

Maybe. Just need to take it easy and see how I go on with 40mg now.

 

[efcforever]

I promise you 100% you'll be surprised at just how much that helps. Come back to me in a week and tell me how you are getting on

Will do mate. Thanks.

 

[Groucho]

Went up to 30 from 20 a couple of weeks ago. I'm going to start on 40mg in the morning.

Exactly the same thing as my wife - she had a rough couple of weeks when it was upped but is now sound.

 

[faddy the blue]

Any news mate ?

She contacted me again somehow last night telling me that there is a proposal at her place which her family is pressurizing her to accept. And that she cannot find it in her heart to accept anyone else. She said she's been fighting again at her place to deny that proposal and has told her folks she wants me. However, her mother then gets ill, gets a high blood pressure and has told her that won't accept me. Her sisters are still pressurizing her. For now, she is trying extremely hard to fight off the pressure and somehow change her family's perception about me. But it looks like they don't wanna change and they won't even meet me or my folks to make a better judgement about us.

I asked my folks to contact her stubborn mother again but now even they say that "We contacted them not once but twice, tried for them to open to the idea by atleast meeting us but they disrespected us both times and did not even want to meet. Her family does not wanna let her marry you. So what more can we do?"

I wish running off was an option for us. Her folks won't even let her leave house, nor would she wanna leave her old mother alone after all these years. She knows what her family is doing is simply wrong and non sensical. Now my folks are telling me to accept the reality and are telling me that even things work out, judging her folks, they will still create mess for you two in the future.

Why is life so cruel? Are people not allowed to live happily?

 

[ScouseClown]

Hey, bit of a weird first post to make, but going through a bit of a tough situation atm and needed somewhere to turn to so thought where else better than with fellow blues.

Basically, the shop I was working in has closed down so we're all being relocated to other shops, I'll be going to town away from all my mates in the other shop and basically gonna be on my own.

I'm due to start a week tomorrow and I'm absolutely dreading it. Always suffered from bad anxiety and depression and it seems to be getting worse every day.

I find it hard meeting new people and interacting and generally feel like an outcast and like I don't belong.

Now on top of that, my grandad has just passed away last week and his funeral is this Thursday.

I lived with him as well as my mum and dad and pretty much was somewhat of a carer for him too.

His death has hit me hard, I keep trying to be strong but keep breaking down. I'm rarely sleeping, my eyes are back to being black and me just looking rough as anything and I'm finding it hard to function at all.

Now my mum, she rarely understands anything I go through, I try talk to her about things and she either doesn't listen or just chooses to look at her phone and this just makes me bottle things up more.

She has told me that I need to go back to work on my new start date, but I honestly don't feel like I'll be able to, especially with it being a few days after the funeral.

Am I being unreasonable or anything by feeling like I need to postpone my start date?

I feel like I need to go the doctor and just get prescriped with something or get counselling like people keep telling me, but I really don't feel comfortable with it at all.

I'm generally just worried that I'll start my shifts and just end up breaking down in there.

So yeah, sorry for the long first post, just needed somewhere to turn and some advice.

Thanks! ♡

 

[chicoazul]

She contacted me again somehow last night telling me that there is a proposal at her place which her family is pressurizing her to accept. And that she cannot find it in her heart to accept anyone else. She said she's been fighting again at her place to deny that proposal and has told her folks she wants me. However, her mother then gets ill, gets a high blood pressure and has told her that won't accept me. Her sisters are still pressurizing her. For now, she is trying extremely hard to fight off the pressure and somehow change her family's perception about me. But it looks like they don't wanna change and they won't even meet me or my folks to make a better judgement about us.

I asked my folks to contact her stubborn mother again but now even they say that "We contacted them not once but twice, tried for them to open to the idea by atleast meeting us but they disrespected us both times and did not even want to meet. Her family does not wanna let her marry you. So what more can we do?"

I wish running off was an option for us. Her folks won't even let her leave house, nor would she wanna leave her old mother alone after all these years. She knows what her family is doing is simply wrong and non sensical. Now my folks are telling me to accept the reality and are telling me that even things work out, judging her folks, they will still create mess for you two in the future.

Why is life so cruel? Are people not allowed to live happily?

Mate this isn't what you want to hear but you must run away with her.

Do what it takes or you'll both regret it forever.

 

[chicoazul]

Hey, bit of a weird first post to make, but going through a bit of a tough situation atm and needed somewhere to turn to so thought where else better than with fellow blues.

Basically, the shop I was working in has closed down so we're all being relocated to other shops, I'll be going to town away from all my mates in the other shop and basically gonna be on my own.

I'm due to start a week tomorrow and I'm absolutely dreading it. Always suffered from bad anxiety and depression and it seems to be getting worse every day.

I find it hard meeting new people and interacting and generally feel like an outcast and like I don't belong.

Now on top of that, my grandad has just passed away last week and his funeral is this Thursday.

I lived with him as well as my mum and dad and pretty much was somewhat of a carer for him too.

His death has hit me hard, I keep trying to be strong but keep breaking down. I'm rarely sleeping, my eyes are back to being black and me just looking rough as anything and I'm finding it hard to function at all.

Now my mum, she rarely understands anything I go through, I try talk to her about things and she either doesn't listen or just chooses to look at her phone and this just makes me bottle things up more.

She has told me that I need to go back to work on my new start date, but I honestly don't feel like I'll be able to, especially with it being a few days after the funeral.

Am I being unreasonable or anything by feeling like I need to postpone my start date?

I feel like I need to go the doctor and just get prescriped with something or get counselling like people keep telling me, but I really don't feel comfortable with it at all.

I'm generally just worried that I'll start my shifts and just end up breaking down in there.

So yeah, sorry for the long first post, just needed somewhere to turn and some advice.

Thanks! ♡

Hello mate. Well in for posting that and by virtue that you've been brace enough to do it means that you're taking steps to adddess your situation and get better. I bet that you've also got similar bravery to make a doctors appointment and say the same thing to him or her. If you do so then you'll feel better sooner than you think. If you don't then you'll continue to feel the same as you have done. So when you put it like that it's an easy choice isn't it?

Don't forget that anxiety puts a false filter on everything. So the failure you're expecting by a change of job location (which triggers anxiety) is just anxiety speaking. The same filter applies to speaking to the doctor. Likelihood is that neither will happen as you predict it mate.

Anxiety is just a chemical induced thought. It CAN be defeated. You know the answers so start with that doctor appointment and at least give the work change a go. If it doesn't work then nothing lost.

 

[ScouseClown]

Fully understand and thank you for replying.

Like deep inside I know that work won't be as bad as I'm making it seem, I just really do feel like unable to start so soon after the funeral due to how close I was to him.

I was tempted to go into the shop and just explain the situation to the manager, even if I just get it postponed by a week or so while I try get myself together.

Would you say that's reasonable?

My old managers knew of the situation with my grandad as he's been sick for awhile and they mentioned it on my forms which they sent to the new shop and said if circumstances change to just contact the new shop. I'm just not sure if I'm being unreasonable by needing that time to grieve and try get myself together.

 

[Mrtallywacker]

Hey, bit of a weird first post to make, but going through a bit of a tough situation atm and needed somewhere to turn to so thought where else better than with fellow blues.

Basically, the shop I was working in has closed down so we're all being relocated to other shops, I'll be going to town away from all my mates in the other shop and basically gonna be on my own.

I'm due to start a week tomorrow and I'm absolutely dreading it. Always suffered from bad anxiety and depression and it seems to be getting worse every day.

I find it hard meeting new people and interacting and generally feel like an outcast and like I don't belong.

Now on top of that, my grandad has just passed away last week and his funeral is this Thursday.

I lived with him as well as my mum and dad and pretty much was somewhat of a carer for him too.

His death has hit me hard, I keep trying to be strong but keep breaking down. I'm rarely sleeping, my eyes are back to being black and me just looking rough as anything and I'm finding it hard to function at all.

Now my mum, she rarely understands anything I go through, I try talk to her about things and she either doesn't listen or just chooses to look at her phone and this just makes me bottle things up more.

She has told me that I need to go back to work on my new start date, but I honestly don't feel like I'll be able to, especially with it being a few days after the funeral.

Am I being unreasonable or anything by feeling like I need to postpone my start date?

I feel like I need to go the doctor and just get prescriped with something or get counselling like people keep telling me, but I really don't feel comfortable with it at all.

I'm generally just worried that I'll start my shifts and just end up breaking down in there.

So yeah, sorry for the long first post, just needed somewhere to turn and some advice.

Thanks! ♡

You have made a massive (and very brave) first step my son and that's by talking about it. As the old saying goes "a problem shared is a problem halved".
God bless you.

 

[EFCPaul]

Ruminating is such a killer. Wish I could find a way to stop it, especially considering things I'm fixated on aren't really in the realms of my control.