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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

My advice wouid be to go to the party mate, just don't drink.

It's important that you get out and about other wise you just end up shutting yourself off from the world.

@anjelikaferret can you advise on the situation re work and the anti depressants ?.
@GwladysBlue I would probably need more info from you as in what your job is an why would your employer reject your medication? PM me.One thing jumps out though- if two of your colleagues have gone off with stress then your employer seems to be ignoring its duty of care towards its employees.
 

Didn’t want to post about my situation. But I need your help blues...

Wishing my life away at the moment because of daft decisions and/or mistakes I’ve made financially. I’ve been paying all sorts of debt for the last 2 years due to unexpected costs of moving into a place with my girlfriend 2 years ago and trying to fit holidays and our carefree student life into our new ‘grown up life’. I also had a period of unemployment 1.5 years ago.

I’ve got credit cards and loans and loans which I got to pay for previous debt and have somehow amassed more! Don’t get me wrong I can afford the debt payments, even if they do take up at least about £400/450 of my monthly wage of ~£1250. I feel I should mention have anxiety and bouts of depression and am prescribed 20mg citalopram (not sure they’re working anymore). We have moved to a cheaper flat but had to pay for decorating etc so still ‘recovering’ from that...

I’ve been thinking about going on some kind of debt plan but am worried about the impact on my credit score as we want to have our own house...eventually...the debt and the lack of ability to save a deposit means this is far away at the moment.

Obviously this is causing severe stress and worry, and more worry about the consequences of what is going to happen in the future and it seems damned if I do damned if I don’t situation!

I wish I had been more careful with debt but there you go - anyone reading if you cannot afford it don’t buy it! and hey this impacts me being able to get back to Liverpool and watch the blues due to lack of money! Some may say that’s a good thing.

Anyone with experience or even just a logical view point on how I can sort this out would be great!
 
Didn’t want to post about my situation. But I need your help blues...

Wishing my life away at the moment because of daft decisions and/or mistakes I’ve made financially. I’ve been paying all sorts of debt for the last 2 years due to unexpected costs of moving into a place with my girlfriend 2 years ago and trying to fit holidays and our carefree student life into our new ‘grown up life’. I also had a period of unemployment 1.5 years ago.

I’ve got credit cards and loans and loans which I got to pay for previous debt and have somehow amassed more! Don’t get me wrong I can afford the debt payments, even if they do take up at least about £400/450 of my monthly wage of ~£1250. I feel I should mention have anxiety and bouts of depression and am prescribed 20mg citalopram (not sure they’re working anymore). We have moved to a cheaper flat but had to pay for decorating etc so still ‘recovering’ from that...

I’ve been thinking about going on some kind of debt plan but am worried about the impact on my credit score as we want to have our own house...eventually...the debt and the lack of ability to save a deposit means this is far away at the moment.

Obviously this is causing severe stress and worry, and more worry about the consequences of what is going to happen in the future and it seems damned if I do damned if I don’t situation!

I wish I had been more careful with debt but there you go - anyone reading if you cannot afford it don’t buy it! and hey this impacts me being able to get back to Liverpool and watch the blues due to lack of money! Some may say that’s a good thing.

Anyone with experience or even just a logical view point on how I can sort this out would be great!
Speak to the Citizens Advice Bureau mate, they will help you with a debt repayment plan, and it's a free service.
 
Give it at week or so and she'll come down.

We're only human mate and all do daft stuff from time to time.

( I'm not advocating using that as an excuse by the way lol )
Just an update on this. It's served as a bit of a wake up call. My wife and I have had some long chats and realised that we have been working against each other rather than together. We have resolved to get back to the team that we used to be and support each other. I'm also never ever getting that drunk again!!
 
Didn’t want to post about my situation. But I need your help blues...

Wishing my life away at the moment because of daft decisions and/or mistakes I’ve made financially. I’ve been paying all sorts of debt for the last 2 years due to unexpected costs of moving into a place with my girlfriend 2 years ago and trying to fit holidays and our carefree student life into our new ‘grown up life’. I also had a period of unemployment 1.5 years ago.

I’ve got credit cards and loans and loans which I got to pay for previous debt and have somehow amassed more! Don’t get me wrong I can afford the debt payments, even if they do take up at least about £400/450 of my monthly wage of ~£1250. I feel I should mention have anxiety and bouts of depression and am prescribed 20mg citalopram (not sure they’re working anymore). We have moved to a cheaper flat but had to pay for decorating etc so still ‘recovering’ from that...

I’ve been thinking about going on some kind of debt plan but am worried about the impact on my credit score as we want to have our own house...eventually...the debt and the lack of ability to save a deposit means this is far away at the moment.

Obviously this is causing severe stress and worry, and more worry about the consequences of what is going to happen in the future and it seems damned if I do damned if I don’t situation!

I wish I had been more careful with debt but there you go - anyone reading if you cannot afford it don’t buy it! and hey this impacts me being able to get back to Liverpool and watch the blues due to lack of money! Some may say that’s a good thing.

Anyone with experience or even just a logical view point on how I can sort this out would be great!

The first thing I'd suggest is going to see your GP and possibly get your Citalopram increased. I currently take 40mg a day. I also take a beta blocker for general anxiety, both are a big help.

As for the money situation...I can relate here, money worries were a source of my anxiety for a long time. I'm no financial expert but I'd suggest that you approach a bank first to see if they can re-finance it all. When my wife finished University nearly 5 years ago, I didn't think a major bank would touch us but they were able to give us a loan which reduced our overall monthly outgoings.

I'd have thought a debt plan would be the last resort, however your health should come first before your credit score.

All the best mate.
 
I finally had my appointment today. Set about 15 reminders this time so couldn't get it confused with something else again.

I'm not sure if I really communicated my feelings well but I do feel a little bit relieved. The Dr was very nice, she asked questions like; do I have any interests, what's my appetite like, how is my attention span, how long have I been feeling this way, what's my sleeping pattern like etc.
I told her it's been for as long as I can remember though it occasionally gets much worse (one of my first posts in this thread was during such a time if I remember rightly), and when I do get low, I lose all motivation, energy and will do to anything in life. I also said I don't know if I'm really depressed, anxious or something but I don't think what I feel is normal and what I'm really after is an explanation to why I feel so bad sometimes. Like, how can I say "I am depressed" when I can't compare my feelings to the normal and know for sure? All I can say is when I feel low, its very low. Its not all the time, but it destroys me when it happens [hindsight: should have said that].
I also suggested maybe I'm autistic to some degree and never been diagnosed but she didn't take that any further.

She didn't want to diagnose me with anything right then and there and gave me some questionnaires about Generalised Anxiety Disorder to fill out and return to her in a month's time. She also recommended I check out my university's support facilities as they will see me much quicker than the NHS would be able to.
So even though the first step has been taken I'm still quite directionless, to be honest.
 

Didn’t want to post about my situation. But I need your help blues...

Wishing my life away at the moment because of daft decisions and/or mistakes I’ve made financially. I’ve been paying all sorts of debt for the last 2 years due to unexpected costs of moving into a place with my girlfriend 2 years ago and trying to fit holidays and our carefree student life into our new ‘grown up life’. I also had a period of unemployment 1.5 years ago.

I’ve got credit cards and loans and loans which I got to pay for previous debt and have somehow amassed more! Don’t get me wrong I can afford the debt payments, even if they do take up at least about £400/450 of my monthly wage of ~£1250. I feel I should mention have anxiety and bouts of depression and am prescribed 20mg citalopram (not sure they’re working anymore). We have moved to a cheaper flat but had to pay for decorating etc so still ‘recovering’ from that...

I’ve been thinking about going on some kind of debt plan but am worried about the impact on my credit score as we want to have our own house...eventually...the debt and the lack of ability to save a deposit means this is far away at the moment.

Obviously this is causing severe stress and worry, and more worry about the consequences of what is going to happen in the future and it seems damned if I do damned if I don’t situation!

I wish I had been more careful with debt but there you go - anyone reading if you cannot afford it don’t buy it! and hey this impacts me being able to get back to Liverpool and watch the blues due to lack of money! Some may say that’s a good thing.

Anyone with experience or even just a logical view point on how I can sort this out would be great!

What is done is done regarding your spending so don't worry about that, it's your repayment strategy you need to focus on, apart from the banks there are reputable and reasonably cheap online companies such as Zopa where you may be able to consolidate your debts into one loan.

Prioritise paying off your expensive credit card bill first as quite likely that will be the higher APR.

When repaying your loans if you can leave a little money aside to enjoy yourself as being totally skint can impact on your relationships.

You are sensible enough to realise that you have made mistakes and you appear to have learned from them which is a massive positive in your favour and your mindset towards paying them off indicates maturity.

Medically I can't help you but I would think finding advice and taking positive action in making strides to paying off your debts would help you sleep better at nights and hopefully enable you to eventually reduce your medication or ideally eradicate the need for any if indeed your debt concerns are the root cause of your anxiety.

I wish you the best of luck, you are doing the right thing in seeking advice and taking action, please make sure you now act decisively as the longer you sit on it the more it will occupy your thoughts, keep us posted, a problem shared and all that.......
 
I finally had my appointment today. Set about 15 reminders this time so couldn't get it confused with something else again.

I'm not sure if I really communicated my feelings well but I do feel a little bit relieved. The Dr was very nice, she asked questions like; do I have any interests, what's my appetite like, how is my attention span, how long have I been feeling this way, what's my sleeping pattern like etc.
I told her it's been for as long as I can remember though it occasionally gets much worse (one of my first posts in this thread was during such a time if I remember rightly), and when I do get low, I lose all motivation, energy and will do to anything in life. I also said I don't know if I'm really depressed, anxious or something but I don't think what I feel is normal and what I'm really after is an explanation to why I feel so bad sometimes. Like, how can I say "I am depressed" when I can't compare my feelings to the normal and know for sure? All I can say is when I feel low, its very low. Its not all the time, but it destroys me when it happens [hindsight: should have said that].
I also suggested maybe I'm autistic to some degree and never been diagnosed but she didn't take that any further.

She didn't want to diagnose me with anything right then and there and gave me some questionnaires about Generalised Anxiety Disorder to fill out and return to her in a month's time. She also recommended I check out my university's support facilities as they will see me much quicker than the NHS would be able to.
So even though the first step has been taken I'm still quite directionless, to be honest.

Hi mate,

You say that you weren't sure whether you communicated your feelings well, but I'd say the opposite.

You've described txt book depression - the periods of feeling ok and the periods of crippling lows.

The reason Doctor asked those question, is that she's trying to get a "handle " on where you are on the scale of despression.

( there's a medical term for it, but can't remember what it is )

She's obviously on the ball, as a lot of Doctors seem to ignore the anxiety that can come with depression, which in itself can be as bad and sometimes worse.

Did she talk about or offer antidepressants, as that's normally the starting point in treatment ?.

Her advice about your University support services is spot on too, as they will be able to help you re counselling much much quicker than the NHS.

One of the hardest things with depression / anxiety is understanding and admitting you have it.

It took me years getting to grips with it and intially I felt the same as you mate, like I was drifting.

Counselling was the key for me mate, as it helped me understand what depression / anxiety is and how to manage it.

You're meeting with the Doctor was very positive mate and my advice to you, would be to access the Uni support services as quickly as you can.

There will be many many students using this facility for a variety of reasons, so you've got nothing to fear from them mate.

Keep up posted x
 
Didn’t want to post about my situation. But I need your help blues...

Wishing my life away at the moment because of daft decisions and/or mistakes I’ve made financially. I’ve been paying all sorts of debt for the last 2 years due to unexpected costs of moving into a place with my girlfriend 2 years ago and trying to fit holidays and our carefree student life into our new ‘grown up life’. I also had a period of unemployment 1.5 years ago.

I’ve got credit cards and loans and loans which I got to pay for previous debt and have somehow amassed more! Don’t get me wrong I can afford the debt payments, even if they do take up at least about £400/450 of my monthly wage of ~£1250. I feel I should mention have anxiety and bouts of depression and am prescribed 20mg citalopram (not sure they’re working anymore). We have moved to a cheaper flat but had to pay for decorating etc so still ‘recovering’ from that...

I’ve been thinking about going on some kind of debt plan but am worried about the impact on my credit score as we want to have our own house...eventually...the debt and the lack of ability to save a deposit means this is far away at the moment.

Obviously this is causing severe stress and worry, and more worry about the consequences of what is going to happen in the future and it seems damned if I do damned if I don’t situation!

I wish I had been more careful with debt but there you go - anyone reading if you cannot afford it don’t buy it! and hey this impacts me being able to get back to Liverpool and watch the blues due to lack of money! Some may say that’s a good thing.

Anyone with experience or even just a logical view point on how I can sort this out would be great!

Mate, I was 32k under in 2008 on loans and credit cards.

Call Stepchange, you need to speak with them. I couldn't recommend this enough.

I am now completely debt free as I received a lump sum recently which enabled me to clear the remaining balance a I was down to the last 6K.

But for 8 years I was with them, it was managed and it released a lot of the stress and anxiety.

Hope it helps.
 
Didn’t want to post about my situation. But I need your help blues...

Wishing my life away at the moment because of daft decisions and/or mistakes I’ve made financially. I’ve been paying all sorts of debt for the last 2 years due to unexpected costs of moving into a place with my girlfriend 2 years ago and trying to fit holidays and our carefree student life into our new ‘grown up life’. I also had a period of unemployment 1.5 years ago.

I’ve got credit cards and loans and loans which I got to pay for previous debt and have somehow amassed more! Don’t get me wrong I can afford the debt payments, even if they do take up at least about £400/450 of my monthly wage of ~£1250. I feel I should mention have anxiety and bouts of depression and am prescribed 20mg citalopram (not sure they’re working anymore). We have moved to a cheaper flat but had to pay for decorating etc so still ‘recovering’ from that...

I’ve been thinking about going on some kind of debt plan but am worried about the impact on my credit score as we want to have our own house...eventually...the debt and the lack of ability to save a deposit means this is far away at the moment.

Obviously this is causing severe stress and worry, and more worry about the consequences of what is going to happen in the future and it seems damned if I do damned if I don’t situation!

I wish I had been more careful with debt but there you go - anyone reading if you cannot afford it don’t buy it! and hey this impacts me being able to get back to Liverpool and watch the blues due to lack of money! Some may say that’s a good thing.

Anyone with experience or even just a logical view point on how I can sort this out would be great!
citizens advice mate will deffo help like
 

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