Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[goodisonopheliac]

I have. It's something that came up in counselling, but the NHS being what it is, I've been discharged and had to self-refer again, which means another two-year wait.

Awesome.

 

[David09]

To be honest I'm not really embarrassed by my mental health being all over the place I'm more ashamed of myself for letting my wife hurt me over such a long period of time.
To admit to anyone a women gave you a black eye is just a no no. I said the age old thing of I walked into a door and went to her family for a bbq and I still to this day can't believe they accepted that explanation. Walking into work on Monday was absolutely horrible to. I covered her arse to protect her job as a secondary school teacher. What a massive mistake because I now don't have it on police record to use in our divorce.
Now during our split she is turning my 13 year old daughter against me.
Without my daughter I literally have nothing.
My wife even got her dad to change the locks on the house and won't give me absolutely anything even kitchen utensils to help me get back on my feet for my poxy little flat. No financial help or furniture.
I just hate life at the moment.
I'm waiting to start cbt on the NHS and I am desperate for this to help me sort my head.

 

[COYBL25]

To be honest I'm not really embarrassed by my mental health being all over the place I'm more ashamed of myself for letting my wife hurt me over such a long period of time.
To admit to anyone a women gave you a black eye is just a no no. I said the age old thing of I walked into a door and went to her family for a bbq and I still to this day can't believe they accepted that explanation. Walking into work on Monday was absolutely horrible to. I covered her arse to protect her job as a secondary school teacher. What a massive mistake because I now don't have it on police record to use in our divorce.
Now during our split she is turning my 13 year old daughter against me.
Without my daughter I literally have nothing.
My wife even got her dad to change the locks on the house and won't give me absolutely anything even kitchen utensils to help me get back on my feet for my poxy little flat. No financial help or furniture.
I just hate life at the moment.
I'm waiting to start cbt on the NHS and I am desperate for this to help me sort my head.

Have you tried - Fathers for Justice ?

They can give you very good practical advice, people to get in touch with and also offer emotional support too.

 

[blue to the bone]

@matty1878
How are you mate.

 

[anjelikaferrett]

One of my male friends just shared this on facebook. Worth a read. What's troubling men

 

[roydo]

To be honest I'm not really embarrassed by my mental health being all over the place I'm more ashamed of myself for letting my wife hurt me over such a long period of time.
To admit to anyone a women gave you a black eye is just a no no. I said the age old thing of I walked into a door and went to her family for a bbq and I still to this day can't believe they accepted that explanation. Walking into work on Monday was absolutely horrible to. I covered her arse to protect her job as a secondary school teacher. What a massive mistake because I now don't have it on police record to use in our divorce.
Now during our split she is turning my 13 year old daughter against me.
Without my daughter I literally have nothing.
My wife even got her dad to change the locks on the house and won't give me absolutely anything even kitchen utensils to help me get back on my feet for my poxy little flat. No financial help or furniture.
I just hate life at the moment.
I'm waiting to start cbt on the NHS and I am desperate for this to help me sort my head.

Turn the tables in your post mate. As in, you are posting as your wife. Your husband has belted you, changed the locks, and is turning your daughter against you.

Digest that, then call the police, and a brief. Good luck. And let us know how it goes. Tons of support here, and elsewhere.

 

[efcforever]

It's that time of year again when people at work are talking about the Xmas do. Many of you know that I have social anxiety and try to avoid these things. My strategy this year has been to fly under the radar and avoid telling people I'm not going. However it's come out today that I'm not attending and people are trying to encourage me to go. It doesn't help that the night out seems to be based around getting as drunk as possible (not my idea of a good time). I hate to let people down when it seems like they genuinely want me to come along. Wouldn't be so bad if it was just a meal or something but I think I'll be avoiding this do.

Not the biggest problem in the world of course. Just hate social anxiety!

 

[Tipp blue]

It's that time of year again when people at work are talking about the Xmas do. Many of you know that I have social anxiety and try to avoid these things. My strategy this year has been to fly under the radar and avoid telling people I'm not going. However it's come out today that I'm not attending and people are trying to encourage me to go. It doesn't help that the night out seems to be based around getting as drunk as possible (not my idea of a good time). I hate to let people down when it seems like they genuinely want me to come along. Wouldn't be so bad if it was just a meal or something but I think I'll be avoiding this do.

Not the biggest problem in the world of course. Just hate social anxiety!

Have you ever just told them how you feel about it basically what you've said here, that you don't like or enjoy a piss up and that you feel uncomfortable at them, they obviously like and respect you or they wouldn't keep at you to go.

 

[efcforever]

Have you ever just told them how you feel about it basically what you've said here, that you don't like or enjoy a piss up and that you feel uncomfortable at them, they obviously like and respect you or they wouldn't keep at you to go.

I'm thinking about it but never have actually said it. I was thinking of maybe talking to one person on the team who I feel most comfortable talking to and quietly explaining it to them. I feel like that may be burdening them a bit though (anxiety...over thinking things. It's a never ending circle once it starts).

I'm think I'm going to tentatively say I'll go but leave myself enough wiggle room to pull out on the day if I can't face it.

 

[Tipp blue]

I'm thinking about it but never have actually said it. I was thinking of maybe talking to one person on the team who I feel most comfortable talking to and quietly explaining it to them. I feel like that may be burdening them a bit though (anxiety...over thinking things. It's a never ending circle once it starts).

I'm think I'm going to tentatively say I'll go but leave myself enough wiggle room to pull out on the day if I can't face it.

I know all about anxiety, I had to get help myself its very hard to break once it starts, luckily for me I've been in good mental health for a little over 3 years now hopefully that will continue, but one thing I could do is talk to people, i would advise you talk to the person that you feel most comfortable talking to, I don't think it will burden anyone just having a talk about it, as you say it's over thinking and you think it will burden them.

 

[efcforever]

I know all about anxiety, I had to get help myself its very hard to break once it starts, luckily for me I've been in good mental health for a little over 3 years now hopefully that will continue, but one thing I could do is talk to people, i would advise you talk to the person that you feel most comfortable talking to, I don't think it will burden anyone just having a talk about it, as you say it's over thinking and you think it will burden them.

Thanks for the advice mate. I'll try and mention it to someone on my team.

My anxiety has been pretty stable for a while now, but I take steps to avoid certain triggers. Unfortunately social events are one of those triggers.

 

[COYBL25]

Have you ever just told them how you feel about it basically what you've said here, that you don't like or enjoy a piss up and that you feel uncomfortable at them, they obviously like and respect you or they wouldn't keep at you to go.

Plan B - Go to the do, wait until they`re all pissed and then slope off.

They`ll won`t notice you`ve gone and will remember the fact that you were there at some point.

Used to work for me every time

 

[Nymzee]

It's that time of year again when people at work are talking about the Xmas do. Many of you know that I have social anxiety and try to avoid these things. My strategy this year has been to fly under the radar and avoid telling people I'm not going. However it's come out today that I'm not attending and people are trying to encourage me to go. It doesn't help that the night out seems to be based around getting as drunk as possible (not my idea of a good time). I hate to let people down when it seems like they genuinely want me to come along. Wouldn't be so bad if it was just a meal or something but I think I'll be avoiding this do.

Not the biggest problem in the world of course. Just hate social anxiety!

Can you not just tell them you already had other plans for that night?

Or have you got a missus? Because that’s stopping plenty going on mine.

 

[efcforever]

Can you not just tell them you already had other plans for that night?

Or have you got a missus? Because that’s stopping plenty going on mine.

Yeah got wife and 2 young kids at home so there's always that excuse. That's how I'll get out of it if/when the anxiety kicks in on the day.

 

[efcforever]

Plan B - Go to the do, wait until they`re all pissed and then slope off.

They`ll won`t notice you`ve gone and will remember the fact that you were there at some point.

Used to work for me every time

If I can make it to the do this is definitely the plan. I'll be sure to say hello to everyone so they remember my presence lol.