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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

David09 said:
I'm in quite a similar situation mate going through a divorce.
My work is good. I'm in a one bedroom rented flat and have a 13 year old daughter who visits but I am getting through. The hardest bit really is the looking after myself. It sounds silly but I just don't no how to do it because my wife did a lot for me.
How do you get through the loneliness at the weekends? I just don't go out even to the pub. I actually find alcohol makes me feel worse so I plan to cut it out or at least back now. I've literally cut everyone out of my life.
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Try and get a routine going.
Most people don't have exciting lives.
Whatever you see on social media is exaggerated.
Try and do stuff at the weekend that you normally do during the week if you can.
Even walking to the asda to buy a lottery ticket.
Nip into Subway on the way.
Just everyday stuff like that.
Your not alone mate.
Stick in
 
So this years been a weird one for me. Got with a girl and she’s been the only good thing to actually come out the year. Got passed up for better jobs twice, came really close to getting them and me arl fella died.

Had about two months off work and I’m back in now and really struggling. I dno what to do. Cos I’m a nurse aswell it’s hard, dealing with dying patients and that after having me own experience of that now is difficult. Most days I feel like I’m drowning and I don’t have any support. The wards massively understaffed so I feel even if I wanted to take more time off I couldn’t anyway. I dno what to do to help and I feel sometimes Cos of how badly I’m clamming up about it I’m pushing me Mrs away.

I realise most of this is just like, circumstantial or whatever but I’m hoping it’ll feel better just to get stuff out in writing, Cos I’m not saying anything to anyone and I feel I’ll have a meltdown soon enough
 
This is my name said:
So this years been a weird one for me. Got with a girl and she’s been the only good thing to actually come out the year. Got passed up for better jobs twice, came really close to getting them and me arl fella died.

Had about two months off work and I’m back in now and really struggling. I dno what to do. Cos I’m a nurse aswell it’s hard, dealing with dying patients and that after having me own experience of that now is difficult. Most days I feel like I’m drowning and I don’t have any support. The wards massively understaffed so I feel even if I wanted to take more time off I couldn’t anyway. I dno what to do to help and I feel sometimes Cos of how badly I’m clamming up about it I’m pushing me Mrs away.

I realise most of this is just like, circumstantial or whatever but I’m hoping it’ll feel better just to get stuff out in writing, Cos I’m not saying anything to anyone and I feel I’ll have a meltdown soon enough
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Believe me mate in that job you really are appreciated by many people.
 
This is my name said:
So this years been a weird one for me. Got with a girl and she’s been the only good thing to actually come out the year. Got passed up for better jobs twice, came really close to getting them and me arl fella died.

Had about two months off work and I’m back in now and really struggling. I dno what to do. Cos I’m a nurse aswell it’s hard, dealing with dying patients and that after having me own experience of that now is difficult. Most days I feel like I’m drowning and I don’t have any support. The wards massively understaffed so I feel even if I wanted to take more time off I couldn’t anyway. I dno what to do to help and I feel sometimes Cos of how badly I’m clamming up about it I’m pushing me Mrs away.

I realise most of this is just like, circumstantial or whatever but I’m hoping it’ll feel better just to get stuff out in writing, Cos I’m not saying anything to anyone and I feel I’ll have a meltdown soon enough
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Is there no one at work you can speak to in confidence mate - councillor etc ?

Regardless of how short staffed they are, they have a duty of care and if the pressure of work is making you ill, they have a legal duty to support you.
 

COYBL25 said:
Is there no one at work you can speak to in confidence mate - councillor etc ?

Regardless of how short staffed they are, they have a duty of care and if the pressure of work is making you ill, they have a legal duty to support you.
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Yeah there’s like a, councillor scheme at work ya can try, they have me the card when I restarted there. I probably should ring them but I can’t talk. The only time I’ve really been able to speak to me mrs about it is when I’m bladdered or over text. I can’t speak or I just fall apart like.
 
This is my name said:
Yeah there’s like a, councillor scheme at work ya can try, they have me the card when I restarted there. I probably should ring them but I can’t talk. The only time I’ve really been able to speak to me mrs about it is when I’m bladdered or over text. I can’t speak or I just fall apart like.
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Have you seen your GP mate ?

It’ll take a while for any referral to a councillor to come through, but at least you’ve got the ball rolling.
 
This is my name said:
So this years been a weird one for me. Got with a girl and she’s been the only good thing to actually come out the year. Got passed up for better jobs twice, came really close to getting them and me arl fella died.

Had about two months off work and I’m back in now and really struggling. I dno what to do. Cos I’m a nurse aswell it’s hard, dealing with dying patients and that after having me own experience of that now is difficult. Most days I feel like I’m drowning and I don’t have any support. The wards massively understaffed so I feel even if I wanted to take more time off I couldn’t anyway. I dno what to do to help and I feel sometimes Cos of how badly I’m clamming up about it I’m pushing me Mrs away.

I realise most of this is just like, circumstantial or whatever but I’m hoping it’ll feel better just to get stuff out in writing, Cos I’m not saying anything to anyone and I feel I’ll have a meltdown soon enough
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I lost me dad in March mate. Thought I was doing well but still had a couple of cries over Christmas while no-one was about. Talk to your Mrs mate. The first time you might be a blubbering wreck but the next time it'll be much easier. She'll appreciate you confiding in her, she probably knows your hurting and would be much happier if you were able to talk to her. The best way I cope with it is to allow myself to feel terrible now and again because it's to be expected. Sounds weird but I was anxious about feeling anxious so if you accept that you're going to feel bad then it somehow feels easier to deal with. Work was really difficult to cope with. Lost all confidence and felt totally inept. No-one really seemed to care so just got through it by not wanting to let my dad down but it was really hard until you get some semblance of normality back. See if you can get referred to Occupational Health and see if they can do anything for you.
 
Hope everyone stays safe tonight and all the best for 2019.

I'm not particularly looking forward to tonight, just going for a family meal then hopefully in bed long before 12 (though I doubt it). I'm doing my best to keep off social media, so I can't see how wonderful everyone's 2018 has been or glammed up pics of people just looking for likes and creepy comments from lads they've never met or wouldn't give the time of day to in person.

I honestly don't know where I'll be this time next year and what 2019 holds for me, but hopefully I'll be in a better place.
 

This is my name said:
Yeah there’s like a, councillor scheme at work ya can try, they have me the card when I restarted there. I probably should ring them but I can’t talk. The only time I’ve really been able to speak to me mrs about it is when I’m bladdered or over text. I can’t speak or I just fall apart like.
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When you say you fall apart what exactly do you mean? I can gaurentee you you'll not do or say anything that any Councillor hasn't seen or heard before that's their job. And if you really still believe you can't talk now I'm sure he/she has an email where you could explain your fears and how you feel about talking. You need to talk especially in your job as its mentally very difficult, you were handed a card with the professionals contact details if people weren't using the service it wouldn't be there in fact I'd be certain that there are some of your close work colleagues using the service and you don't even know. Anyway what ever you decide to do best of luck with it.
 
This is my name said:
So this years been a weird one for me. Got with a girl and she’s been the only good thing to actually come out the year. Got passed up for better jobs twice, came really close to getting them and me arl fella died.

Had about two months off work and I’m back in now and really struggling. I dno what to do. Cos I’m a nurse aswell it’s hard, dealing with dying patients and that after having me own experience of that now is difficult. Most days I feel like I’m drowning and I don’t have any support. The wards massively understaffed so I feel even if I wanted to take more time off I couldn’t anyway. I dno what to do to help and I feel sometimes Cos of how badly I’m clamming up about it I’m pushing me Mrs away.

I realise most of this is just like, circumstantial or whatever but I’m hoping it’ll feel better just to get stuff out in writing, Cos I’m not saying anything to anyone and I feel I’ll have a meltdown soon enough
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Keep posting in here mate and get it all off your chest. As @COYBL25 sometimes says - we're all in this together.
 
BluePaul86 said:
Hope everyone stays safe tonight and all the best for 2019.

I'm not particularly looking forward to tonight, just going for a family meal then hopefully in bed long before 12 (though I doubt it). I'm doing my best to keep off social media, so I can't see how wonderful everyone's 2018 has been or glammed up pics of people just looking for likes and creepy comments from lads they've never met or wouldn't give the time of day to in person.

I honestly don't know where I'll be this time next year and what 2019 holds for me, but hopefully I'll be in a better place.
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Most of social media is lies mate.
I've hit the beer big time on my own.
 
blue to the bone said:
This night last year was one of the worse I put down. Just a culmination of stuff and been on my own got to me.
I was near breaking point.
Not looking forward to tonight but not as bad as last year I know that.
Just gonna relax, stay of social media, and look forward to the game tomorrow.
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Hopefully I'll be so pissed at midnight mate I can't speak.
Enjoy the game tomorrow. I went to Burnley on boxing day and it really made me smile and forget everyone.
 

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