Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[Baggzio]

Hey lads. I've written and rewritten this a few times in my mind already and honestly I can't get it right so sorry if this post seems a bit off or scatterbrained. I've only joined here recently but have always been aware of this thread and that ye lads are helpful and understanding of things so I've always had the intention of coming on here and talking about some of my issues but I've never really disclosed anything like that in many ways especially not a public forum such as this.

Basically and as you might tell by my pic on here I'm just a 19 year old lad who really struggles with emotions, depression and anxiety, all the fun stuff. I've actually been dealing with these issues since about the start of my teens and honestly it's taken a toll.

Obviously there are a few different key things that contribute to these feelings and I know exactly what they are and why I'm being effected by them but honestly I'd prefer not to divulge them publicly.

This summer for me has been the hardest in years because honesty I have such an uncertainty in my life at the minute. I just finished school and I'm waiting to get my results back to see if I get into college and honestly I'm afraid that I didn't do well enough for it and I know for a fact my family are going to be so disappointed and angry about it. On top of that presuming I make it to college I'm living away from all my friends as we'd be going to different places and because I've never "mixed" all too well socially I'm scared of how it's all going to go and maybe that I might lose contact with my friends currently. It's just a massive fear for me, sort of a damned if you do and damned if you don't situation in my eyes.

Honestly the best thing going on in my life is actually Everton. Through everything I've been through really the club has been my "constant". I mean I was at my first game at Goodison just this past year for my birthday and even though we lost, to West Brom no less, it was the happiest I've been in honestly years. Obviously the club had a bad 2 years but it didn't matter to me, I knew no matter how crap my day was going that come the weekend there'll be a match on that will take my mind off it and might even lift my spirits a bit. It was just such a help and I think honestly as sad as it sounds that's another reason why my summer is seemingly worse because I don't have the football club to take my mind off of other things.

Sorry if this post was just rambling or anything like that I just felt like tonight I finally had to say something to someone (albeit I know this is just a forum) because I've not been feeling good at all. I'm sorry also if this isn't the place for something like this as well, I kinda took the thread to maybe mean that but if it's not posts like this that are supposed to be on here I'll remove it no problem.

Anyways that's me and all my glory blues sorry again for the long rambling post

So I've been thinking of this a lot recently and with it being almost 3 years since I wrote this I wanted to just give a of an update. This isn't for me to be self congratulatory or anything like that but as I'm not someone that'd be too open to give advice myself in this thread I'd like to think if I could help anyone, especially the younger lads on here who may have had a similar story or problem such as mine then it's the best thing I could do.

3 years ago was one of the worst times in my life. At only 19 I felt there was nothing left for me and that I had absolutely no future, how wrong could I have been? My fears did come true and I didn't do as well as I should've in my exams but as many on here pointed out, there are always other options and it won't be the end of the world.

I went off to do some different courses that I didn't click into and dropped out of. That all changed the very next year when I reapplied to college but for a completely different field and said I'd take the chance and try my hand at something different. It honestly changed my life.

Not only was I in a college course that suited me and interested me but like I said in my post I've always had issues with anxiety and socializing and all that. All those issues, gone. Everyone else was just like me. I had never been so surprised to see that maybe I wasn't so socially inept as I thought, maybe I was just around people who I just didn't have that many common interests as and it made things more difficult for me. It was honestly a life changing realisation for me and helped to dramatically improve my outlook on life. I went out more, did more social activities and most importantly I went into college every day not because I knew I had to but because I wanted to, something that all through school was completely alien to me.

In retrospect the path I took to get through college was absolutely the best way for me because it showed me why I needed to work hard and that not everyone's going to like you but that doesn't matter. I also began taking up more hobbies and interests and basically just opening myself up to the world around me. Had a few jobs and now one that I'm very good at, dealing with customers all day which would've been an absolute nightmare before but it's nothing to me now. Not everything's perfect of course but with all this as well as the help of the college's own counselling service any bad day can be helped with and they're a much rarer occurrence now.

Just for anyone who's read this and may have read my post from years ago the best advice I can give is, It's going to be alright. There are always people who'll care and always those who'll help you. Whether it's the brilliant lads on here who I can still see helping or a counselling service or some friends, there'll always be someone to talk to. And there's no shame in talking. Not one bit. Even if it's just a bit of an anonymous forum post, that's what kinda kick started my road to a better, happier life, who knows it might help you too. We all have one thing in common here and it's that we're all Blues, just knowing that there's someone to chat to even if it is just about Everton to get your mind off of things is a massive help honestly.

For any younger people who've seen this and have maybe just finished exams or are still doing them and are a bit worried, there's always a path to where you want to get to, even if it's not the most obvious one to you in that moment. I'm 22 now and I'm a completely different person to who I was 3 years ago and will likely change a lot in the next 3 years. Your struggles and worries right now are absolutely real and valid right now but just know from someone with experience and just as others on here told me years ago, things will get better. Believe in yourself, because everyone else will believe in you too!

Thanks again for all the help back in the day lads. Really meant a lot then and it still does now. And most importantly COYB!

 

[COYBL25]

So I've been thinking of this a lot recently and with it being almost 3 years since I wrote this I wanted to just give a of an update. This isn't for me to be self congratulatory or anything like that but as I'm not someone that'd be too open to give advice myself in this thread I'd like to think if I could help anyone, especially the younger lads on here who may have had a similar story or problem such as mine then it's the best thing I could do.

3 years ago was one of the worst times in my life. At only 19 I felt there was nothing left for me and that I had absolutely no future, how wrong could I have been? My fears did come true and I didn't do as well as I should've in my exams but as many on here pointed out, there are always other options and it won't be the end of the world.

I went off to do some different courses that I didn't click into and dropped out of. That all changed the very next year when I reapplied to college but for a completely different field and said I'd take the chance and try my hand at something different. It honestly changed my life.

Not only was I in a college course that suited me and interested me but like I said in my post I've always had issues with anxiety and socializing and all that. All those issues, gone. Everyone else was just like me. I had never been so surprised to see that maybe I wasn't so socially inept as I thought, maybe I was just around people who I just didn't have that many common interests as and it made things more difficult for me. It was honestly a life changing realisation for me and helped to dramatically improve my outlook on life. I went out more, did more social activities and most importantly I went into college every day not because I knew I had to but because I wanted to, something that all through school was completely alien to me.

In retrospect the path I took to get through college was absolutely the best way for me because it showed me why I needed to work hard and that not everyone's going to like you but that doesn't matter. I also began taking up more hobbies and interests and basically just opening myself up to the world around me. Had a few jobs and now one that I'm very good at, dealing with customers all day which would've been an absolute nightmare before but it's nothing to me now. Not everything's perfect of course but with all this as well as the help of the college's own counselling service any bad day can be helped with and they're a much rarer occurrence now.

Just for anyone who's read this and may have read my post from years ago the best advice I can give is, It's going to be alright. There are always people who'll care and always those who'll help you. Whether it's the brilliant lads on here who I can still see helping or a counselling service or some friends, there'll always be someone to talk to. And there's no shame in talking. Not one bit. Even if it's just a bit of an anonymous forum post, that's what kinda kick started my road to a better, happier life, who knows it might help you too. We all have one thing in common here and it's that we're all Blues, just knowing that there's someone to chat to even if it is just about Everton to get your mind off of things is a massive help honestly.

For any younger people who've seen this and have maybe just finished exams or are still doing them and are a bit worried, there's always a path to where you want to get to, even if it's not the most obvious one to you in that moment. I'm 22 now and I'm a completely different person to who I was 3 years ago and will likely change a lot in the next 3 years. Your struggles and worries right now are absolutely real and valid right now but just know from someone with experience and just as others on here told me years ago, things will get better. Believe in yourself, because everyone else will believe in you too!

Thanks again for all the help back in the day lads. Really meant a lot then and it still does now. And most importantly COYB!

Wonderful post mate.

 

[Baggzio]

Wonderful post mate.

Cheers mate, some stellar work goes on here only fair for me to give credit where it's due and also maybe help someone who might've been in the same boat as me.

 

[Frang]

So I've been thinking of this a lot recently and with it being almost 3 years since I wrote this I wanted to just give a of an update. This isn't for me to be self congratulatory or anything like that but as I'm not someone that'd be too open to give advice myself in this thread I'd like to think if I could help anyone, especially the younger lads on here who may have had a similar story or problem such as mine then it's the best thing I could do.

3 years ago was one of the worst times in my life. At only 19 I felt there was nothing left for me and that I had absolutely no future, how wrong could I have been? My fears did come true and I didn't do as well as I should've in my exams but as many on here pointed out, there are always other options and it won't be the end of the world.

I went off to do some different courses that I didn't click into and dropped out of. That all changed the very next year when I reapplied to college but for a completely different field and said I'd take the chance and try my hand at something different. It honestly changed my life.

Not only was I in a college course that suited me and interested me but like I said in my post I've always had issues with anxiety and socializing and all that. All those issues, gone. Everyone else was just like me. I had never been so surprised to see that maybe I wasn't so socially inept as I thought, maybe I was just around people who I just didn't have that many common interests as and it made things more difficult for me. It was honestly a life changing realisation for me and helped to dramatically improve my outlook on life. I went out more, did more social activities and most importantly I went into college every day not because I knew I had to but because I wanted to, something that all through school was completely alien to me.

In retrospect the path I took to get through college was absolutely the best way for me because it showed me why I needed to work hard and that not everyone's going to like you but that doesn't matter. I also began taking up more hobbies and interests and basically just opening myself up to the world around me. Had a few jobs and now one that I'm very good at, dealing with customers all day which would've been an absolute nightmare before but it's nothing to me now. Not everything's perfect of course but with all this as well as the help of the college's own counselling service any bad day can be helped with and they're a much rarer occurrence now.

Just for anyone who's read this and may have read my post from years ago the best advice I can give is, It's going to be alright. There are always people who'll care and always those who'll help you. Whether it's the brilliant lads on here who I can still see helping or a counselling service or some friends, there'll always be someone to talk to. And there's no shame in talking. Not one bit. Even if it's just a bit of an anonymous forum post, that's what kinda kick started my road to a better, happier life, who knows it might help you too. We all have one thing in common here and it's that we're all Blues, just knowing that there's someone to chat to even if it is just about Everton to get your mind off of things is a massive help honestly.

For any younger people who've seen this and have maybe just finished exams or are still doing them and are a bit worried, there's always a path to where you want to get to, even if it's not the most obvious one to you in that moment. I'm 22 now and I'm a completely different person to who I was 3 years ago and will likely change a lot in the next 3 years. Your struggles and worries right now are absolutely real and valid right now but just know from someone with experience and just as others on here told me years ago, things will get better. Believe in yourself, because everyone else will believe in you too!

Thanks again for all the help back in the day lads. Really meant a lot then and it still does now. And most importantly COYB!

superb mate. well done. and thanks for inviting others to share if they feel the need to or are worried about posting in here, im sure your posts will make a lot of other think the same as you did.

its ok, not to be ok as they say.

 

[Baggzio]

Wonderful post mate.

superb mate. well done. and thanks for inviting others to share if they feel the need to or are worried about posting in here, im sure your posts will make a lot of other think the same as you did.

its ok, not to be ok as they say.

If it can help even just one person even a little bit then it was well worth it for me. All the lads on here that help others daily are a credit to themselves, the site and Everton fans on a whole. Amazing people that can really make a different to someone in a bad place.

 

[chrismpw]

So I've been thinking of this a lot recently and with it being almost 3 years since I wrote this I wanted to just give a of an update. This isn't for me to be self congratulatory or anything like that but as I'm not someone that'd be too open to give advice myself in this thread I'd like to think if I could help anyone, especially the younger lads on here who may have had a similar story or problem such as mine then it's the best thing I could do.

3 years ago was one of the worst times in my life. At only 19 I felt there was nothing left for me and that I had absolutely no future, how wrong could I have been? My fears did come true and I didn't do as well as I should've in my exams but as many on here pointed out, there are always other options and it won't be the end of the world.

I went off to do some different courses that I didn't click into and dropped out of. That all changed the very next year when I reapplied to college but for a completely different field and said I'd take the chance and try my hand at something different. It honestly changed my life.

Not only was I in a college course that suited me and interested me but like I said in my post I've always had issues with anxiety and socializing and all that. All those issues, gone. Everyone else was just like me. I had never been so surprised to see that maybe I wasn't so socially inept as I thought, maybe I was just around people who I just didn't have that many common interests as and it made things more difficult for me. It was honestly a life changing realisation for me and helped to dramatically improve my outlook on life. I went out more, did more social activities and most importantly I went into college every day not because I knew I had to but because I wanted to, something that all through school was completely alien to me.

In retrospect the path I took to get through college was absolutely the best way for me because it showed me why I needed to work hard and that not everyone's going to like you but that doesn't matter. I also began taking up more hobbies and interests and basically just opening myself up to the world around me. Had a few jobs and now one that I'm very good at, dealing with customers all day which would've been an absolute nightmare before but it's nothing to me now. Not everything's perfect of course but with all this as well as the help of the college's own counselling service any bad day can be helped with and they're a much rarer occurrence now.

Just for anyone who's read this and may have read my post from years ago the best advice I can give is, It's going to be alright. There are always people who'll care and always those who'll help you. Whether it's the brilliant lads on here who I can still see helping or a counselling service or some friends, there'll always be someone to talk to. And there's no shame in talking. Not one bit. Even if it's just a bit of an anonymous forum post, that's what kinda kick started my road to a better, happier life, who knows it might help you too. We all have one thing in common here and it's that we're all Blues, just knowing that there's someone to chat to even if it is just about Everton to get your mind off of things is a massive help honestly.

For any younger people who've seen this and have maybe just finished exams or are still doing them and are a bit worried, there's always a path to where you want to get to, even if it's not the most obvious one to you in that moment. I'm 22 now and I'm a completely different person to who I was 3 years ago and will likely change a lot in the next 3 years. Your struggles and worries right now are absolutely real and valid right now but just know from someone with experience and just as others on here told me years ago, things will get better. Believe in yourself, because everyone else will believe in you too!

Thanks again for all the help back in the day lads. Really meant a lot then and it still does now. And most importantly COYB!

Nice one.

 

[anjelikaferrett]

So I've been thinking of this a lot recently and with it being almost 3 years since I wrote this I wanted to just give a of an update. This isn't for me to be self congratulatory or anything like that but as I'm not someone that'd be too open to give advice myself in this thread I'd like to think if I could help anyone, especially the younger lads on here who may have had a similar story or problem such as mine then it's the best thing I could do.

3 years ago was one of the worst times in my life. At only 19 I felt there was nothing left for me and that I had absolutely no future, how wrong could I have been? My fears did come true and I didn't do as well as I should've in my exams but as many on here pointed out, there are always other options and it won't be the end of the world.

I went off to do some different courses that I didn't click into and dropped out of. That all changed the very next year when I reapplied to college but for a completely different field and said I'd take the chance and try my hand at something different. It honestly changed my life.

Not only was I in a college course that suited me and interested me but like I said in my post I've always had issues with anxiety and socializing and all that. All those issues, gone. Everyone else was just like me. I had never been so surprised to see that maybe I wasn't so socially inept as I thought, maybe I was just around people who I just didn't have that many common interests as and it made things more difficult for me. It was honestly a life changing realisation for me and helped to dramatically improve my outlook on life. I went out more, did more social activities and most importantly I went into college every day not because I knew I had to but because I wanted to, something that all through school was completely alien to me.

In retrospect the path I took to get through college was absolutely the best way for me because it showed me why I needed to work hard and that not everyone's going to like you but that doesn't matter. I also began taking up more hobbies and interests and basically just opening myself up to the world around me. Had a few jobs and now one that I'm very good at, dealing with customers all day which would've been an absolute nightmare before but it's nothing to me now. Not everything's perfect of course but with all this as well as the help of the college's own counselling service any bad day can be helped with and they're a much rarer occurrence now.

Just for anyone who's read this and may have read my post from years ago the best advice I can give is, It's going to be alright. There are always people who'll care and always those who'll help you. Whether it's the brilliant lads on here who I can still see helping or a counselling service or some friends, there'll always be someone to talk to. And there's no shame in talking. Not one bit. Even if it's just a bit of an anonymous forum post, that's what kinda kick started my road to a better, happier life, who knows it might help you too. We all have one thing in common here and it's that we're all Blues, just knowing that there's someone to chat to even if it is just about Everton to get your mind off of things is a massive help honestly.

For any younger people who've seen this and have maybe just finished exams or are still doing them and are a bit worried, there's always a path to where you want to get to, even if it's not the most obvious one to you in that moment. I'm 22 now and I'm a completely different person to who I was 3 years ago and will likely change a lot in the next 3 years. Your struggles and worries right now are absolutely real and valid right now but just know from someone with experience and just as others on here told me years ago, things will get better. Believe in yourself, because everyone else will believe in you too!

Thanks again for all the help back in the day lads. Really meant a lot then and it still does now. And most importantly COYB!

That is awesome.

 

[SiEdmo]

So I've been thinking of this a lot recently and with it being almost 3 years since I wrote this I wanted to just give a of an update. This isn't for me to be self congratulatory or anything like that but as I'm not someone that'd be too open to give advice myself in this thread I'd like to think if I could help anyone, especially the younger lads on here who may have had a similar story or problem such as mine then it's the best thing I could do.

3 years ago was one of the worst times in my life. At only 19 I felt there was nothing left for me and that I had absolutely no future, how wrong could I have been? My fears did come true and I didn't do as well as I should've in my exams but as many on here pointed out, there are always other options and it won't be the end of the world.

I went off to do some different courses that I didn't click into and dropped out of. That all changed the very next year when I reapplied to college but for a completely different field and said I'd take the chance and try my hand at something different. It honestly changed my life.

Not only was I in a college course that suited me and interested me but like I said in my post I've always had issues with anxiety and socializing and all that. All those issues, gone. Everyone else was just like me. I had never been so surprised to see that maybe I wasn't so socially inept as I thought, maybe I was just around people who I just didn't have that many common interests as and it made things more difficult for me. It was honestly a life changing realisation for me and helped to dramatically improve my outlook on life. I went out more, did more social activities and most importantly I went into college every day not because I knew I had to but because I wanted to, something that all through school was completely alien to me.

In retrospect the path I took to get through college was absolutely the best way for me because it showed me why I needed to work hard and that not everyone's going to like you but that doesn't matter. I also began taking up more hobbies and interests and basically just opening myself up to the world around me. Had a few jobs and now one that I'm very good at, dealing with customers all day which would've been an absolute nightmare before but it's nothing to me now. Not everything's perfect of course but with all this as well as the help of the college's own counselling service any bad day can be helped with and they're a much rarer occurrence now.

Just for anyone who's read this and may have read my post from years ago the best advice I can give is, It's going to be alright. There are always people who'll care and always those who'll help you. Whether it's the brilliant lads on here who I can still see helping or a counselling service or some friends, there'll always be someone to talk to. And there's no shame in talking. Not one bit. Even if it's just a bit of an anonymous forum post, that's what kinda kick started my road to a better, happier life, who knows it might help you too. We all have one thing in common here and it's that we're all Blues, just knowing that there's someone to chat to even if it is just about Everton to get your mind off of things is a massive help honestly.

For any younger people who've seen this and have maybe just finished exams or are still doing them and are a bit worried, there's always a path to where you want to get to, even if it's not the most obvious one to you in that moment. I'm 22 now and I'm a completely different person to who I was 3 years ago and will likely change a lot in the next 3 years. Your struggles and worries right now are absolutely real and valid right now but just know from someone with experience and just as others on here told me years ago, things will get better. Believe in yourself, because everyone else will believe in you too!

Thanks again for all the help back in the day lads. Really meant a lot then and it still does now. And most importantly COYB!

boss that lad.......lovely to read! g'wed bro!!!

 

[tommytowne]

Me again.
Well I'm sitting here at home some 18 hrs after returning from a few days away in Spain.
Almost a week ago I finally got through to the Trust who in turn had one of the duty nurses ring me with the nett result that I'm going to have some counselling sessions. That was partly because I told them of my reluctance to start the Sertraline tabs I'd been prescribed. As I had mentioned, I certainly wasn't going to start to take them whilst abroad due to possible initial side effects.
But, I had a horrendous time whilst away being the most unhappy miserable sod imagineable.
So I've decided to start the tablets. In fairness the duty nurse I spoke with, whilst saying throughout that it was my choice, was as sure as she could be, that the low dose I've been given would be ok to take.
Twenty eight days now confronts me to see if these can help.

 

[COYBL25]

Me again.
Well I'm sitting here at home some 18 hrs after returning from a few days away in Spain.
Almost a week ago I finally got through to the Trust who in turn had one of the duty nurses ring me with the nett result that I'm going to have some counselling sessions. That was partly because I told them of my reluctance to start the Sertraline tabs I'd been prescribed. As I had mentioned, I certainly wasn't going to start to take them whilst abroad due to possible initial side effects.
But, I had a horrendous time whilst away being the most unhappy miserable sod imagineable.
So I've decided to start the tablets. In fairness the duty nurse I spoke with, whilst saying throughout that it was my choice, was as sure as she could be, that the low dose I've been given would be ok to take.
Twenty eight days now confronts me to see if these can help.

Don`t expect miracles to start with mate, as they take time to kick in.

If you become worried about any side effects you may be having on them, post on here, as there`s loads of people that will " walk " you through what`s going on - as they will have experienced similar if not the same.

Don`t be frightened of them, as the worst thing that can happen is that they don`t work the way they`re supposed to and you can then try another type

 

[Frang]

Me again.
Well I'm sitting here at home some 18 hrs after returning from a few days away in Spain.
Almost a week ago I finally got through to the Trust who in turn had one of the duty nurses ring me with the nett result that I'm going to have some counselling sessions. That was partly because I told them of my reluctance to start the Sertraline tabs I'd been prescribed. As I had mentioned, I certainly wasn't going to start to take them whilst abroad due to possible initial side effects.
But, I had a horrendous time whilst away being the most unhappy miserable sod imagineable.
So I've decided to start the tablets. In fairness the duty nurse I spoke with, whilst saying throughout that it was my choice, was as sure as she could be, that the low dose I've been given would be ok to take.
Twenty eight days now confronts me to see if these can help.

give them at least 4 weeks ,,. at least .

I found id perked up a little on the second week personally

you will just notice yourself doing 'normal' stuff again and suddenly think to yourself, these things must be working as I wouldn't be doing or feeling like this normally!

 

[tommytowne]

give them at least 4 weeks ,,. at least .

I found id perked up a little on the second week personally

you will just notice yourself doing 'normal' stuff again and suddenly think to yourself, these things must be working as I wouldn't be doing or feeling like this normally!

The main reason I'm taking them was constantly feeling an inescapable sensation of carrying a ton weight on my shoulders.

 

[Frang]

The main reason I'm taking them was constantly feeling an inescapable sensation of carrying a ton weight on my shoulders.

I couldn't go to work as I would be up allnight worrying about it and end up with no sleep whatsoever...

it manifested itself into some sort of extreme anxiety where I couldn't even go to a shop, stand in any sort of queue , or leave the flat on some days.

the meds have definitely helped me over that.

 

[Frang]

one of the hardest things I found was going to Goodison..

my old man got me the ST hoping it would 'cheer me up' but not realising the stress of being around so many people was causing !

I had a few panic attacks on the train there and had to try my best to hide it, but its impossible.

the meds have 100% helped me over this.

 

[Minimeister]

So I've been thinking of this a lot recently and with it being almost 3 years since I wrote this I wanted to just give a of an update. This isn't for me to be self congratulatory or anything like that but as I'm not someone that'd be too open to give advice myself in this thread I'd like to think if I could help anyone, especially the younger lads on here who may have had a similar story or problem such as mine then it's the best thing I could do.

3 years ago was one of the worst times in my life. At only 19 I felt there was nothing left for me and that I had absolutely no future, how wrong could I have been? My fears did come true and I didn't do as well as I should've in my exams but as many on here pointed out, there are always other options and it won't be the end of the world.

I went off to do some different courses that I didn't click into and dropped out of. That all changed the very next year when I reapplied to college but for a completely different field and said I'd take the chance and try my hand at something different. It honestly changed my life.

Not only was I in a college course that suited me and interested me but like I said in my post I've always had issues with anxiety and socializing and all that. All those issues, gone. Everyone else was just like me. I had never been so surprised to see that maybe I wasn't so socially inept as I thought, maybe I was just around people who I just didn't have that many common interests as and it made things more difficult for me. It was honestly a life changing realisation for me and helped to dramatically improve my outlook on life. I went out more, did more social activities and most importantly I went into college every day not because I knew I had to but because I wanted to, something that all through school was completely alien to me.

In retrospect the path I took to get through college was absolutely the best way for me because it showed me why I needed to work hard and that not everyone's going to like you but that doesn't matter. I also began taking up more hobbies and interests and basically just opening myself up to the world around me. Had a few jobs and now one that I'm very good at, dealing with customers all day which would've been an absolute nightmare before but it's nothing to me now. Not everything's perfect of course but with all this as well as the help of the college's own counselling service any bad day can be helped with and they're a much rarer occurrence now.

Just for anyone who's read this and may have read my post from years ago the best advice I can give is, It's going to be alright. There are always people who'll care and always those who'll help you. Whether it's the brilliant lads on here who I can still see helping or a counselling service or some friends, there'll always be someone to talk to. And there's no shame in talking. Not one bit. Even if it's just a bit of an anonymous forum post, that's what kinda kick started my road to a better, happier life, who knows it might help you too. We all have one thing in common here and it's that we're all Blues, just knowing that there's someone to chat to even if it is just about Everton to get your mind off of things is a massive help honestly.

For any younger people who've seen this and have maybe just finished exams or are still doing them and are a bit worried, there's always a path to where you want to get to, even if it's not the most obvious one to you in that moment. I'm 22 now and I'm a completely different person to who I was 3 years ago and will likely change a lot in the next 3 years. Your struggles and worries right now are absolutely real and valid right now but just know from someone with experience and just as others on here told me years ago, things will get better. Believe in yourself, because everyone else will believe in you too!

Thanks again for all the help back in the day lads. Really meant a lot then and it still does now. And most importantly COYB!

Seen a few posts from young people on here and you want to say just get through it and it really won't seem so important a couple of years down the line. This post just needs re-posting whenever that happens in future.