Hey lads a few of you might be able to relate to this and thought here would be as good a place as any for advice. So I’ve a history of depression and suicidal thoughts and stuff like that, I’ve posted on here a few times over the past few years even.
Well I thought I generally had everything mostly under control for the last few years even with the pandemic but it’s all come crumbling down these past few days. I’m 24 and I’ve just lost my best friend, my dog that I’ve had since I was 12.
He was old I know and I was beginning to accept he was gonna pass soon but unfortunately he got into an accident and due to his age the vet wasn’t able to do much. I got to say a little goodbye to him but not anything close to what I imagined.
This is the first real time in my life I’ve had to grieve for someone or something I truly care about and it’s absolutely tearing me apart. I’ve basically done nothing but lay in bed and cry for 2 days and I’m now currently writing this in the middle of the night because I can’t get the little lad out of my head.
I know some people might say he’s only a dog and get over it or whatever but I’ve had him for half of my life and literally every part of my life that I remember he was there too, I’m trying to imagine how I’m gonna be without him.
I just feel awful about the whole thing between feelings of guilt, sadness, anger and anxiety about his life and my own. I loved him as much as anyone else in my family and like I said he was my best friend. I know I’m a grown man now but I feel like a helpless child without him and I don’t know what I’ll do.
I’m in a real bad place now honestly and I’m gonna miss him so much, I really don’t know how I’m gonna cope not seeing him around or feeding him or anything. He’s just gone and I barely got to say goodbye to him.
I’m just a mess now even thinking about him the poor fella. I’m gonna miss you so much little buddy.