Everton Summer Transfer Thread - 2022

[Professor Toffee]

I know it means very little in the grand scheme of things, but his shuttle runs in the Washington training video were insane.

The Clare Balding hairdo will be the making of him.

He has male pattern balding

 

[blulouie]

We don't know yet, the season doesn't start for another 3 weeks.

Right oh...keep us informed.

 

[blulouie]

The last 20 odd pages have been erm, interesting. @ForeverBlue92 you made this comparison that Benitez & Lampard both had 18 games so why is Lampard's 16th position more acceptable than Benitez's 16th league position. I'm fairly certain you have expressed this same point many times before too.

If Everton are likened to the Titanic, Carlo sailed through the cold waters, saw the danger ahead & jumped ship. Benitez then took the helm & looked confident at first but then sailed us straight into an iceberg. "Tis but a scratch" claimed Benitez & carried on but the damage was done. 18 Premier league games with a massive gash in the side & Benitez deciding to take it out on the lifeboats, tell the passengers the lifeboats are useless & ditch some in the sea to be replaced by a foreign dinghy that came with a torn up manual no one can understand.
By now the ship is in deep deep trouble & the bow is very much starting to point upwards. Finally Benitez has gone & Frank has taken the helm but it's really not looking good & the ship is breaking & the damage has been done. Frank issues what's left of the lifeboats to be used & somebody for the love of god work out how to read that Ukrainian dinghy manual pronto. It's not pretty but at least there is hope now.
The ship is sinking & going down fast, there is a chance of survival but the cold waters of relegation are lethal. Richarlison tells Frank to never let go & as the water takes them they kick for thier lives & grab a lifeline sent from the fans, A one berth floating door as it happens & Frank & Everton survive thier ordeal. Richarlison will forever be remembered for painting us like one of those french girls as he sinks down south.

Benitez sank the ship in admittedly rocky waters. Lampard never even got the chance to sail it properly. All he did was save us. That's why the 18 games each are not comparable & why Franks 16th is better than Benitez's.

Brilliant summary , well done Sir.

 

[Bluemersey]

“My dads gonna shag your dad“ is much more menacing

Only in an Everton transfer forum would this appear. Must admit I found it more interesting than actual transfer news ?

 

[Mrtallywacker]

I am sure I am not the only one bored out my mind by this never ending "my Dads bigger your Dad" crap.

Everton Summer Transfer Thread.

Off Topic warnings if it doesnt stop.

To be fair my son, my dad probably is bigger than yours, he's a right porker.

On topic, who do you think we will sign Brother Roydo?

God bless.

 

[nsno-chris]

I can quite confidently say as I sip a tequila sunrise and watch beautiful women go past my hotel pool that I couldn't care less how many likes some post on a forum has.

But hey the lads winning at life apparently so good for him I suppose.

Yet, on your holidays and at the pool, you’re on this very same forum.

 

[roydo]

To be fair my son, my dad probably is bigger than yours, he's a right porker.

On topic, who do you think we will sign Brother Roydo?

God bless.

My old man is ashes in the river severn, so will be a no show.

Not a clue who we will sign. Happy with the new CH, a fit DCL makes a huge difference,and we might actually see more than a few minutes from JPG.

 

[billyblue80]

I’ve thought quite a lot about this.

I think Gordon had an outstanding season. So I’m very much on the other side of the fence, but I see enough doubt from people whose opinion I respect to make me wonder about where the difference in perception lies.

The best I can come up with is that the difference is split on effort / effectiveness lines.

His sheer graft, and unwillingness to give up is what really stood out to me. He was trying to be a leader on the pitch, and I really admired that in a kid of his age. It shouldn’t have been on him to try and change the fortunes of the side - but he tried to anyway.

However, given all that, it’s only fair to look at the usual metrics - goals and assists -particularly for a player in his position - and they weren’t very impressive.

I suppose it boils down to what mix of effort and effectiveness makes any of us warm to a player.

I think it's fair to both say he made a big step last season in terms of playing regular EPL footy,working his behind off, understanding his defensive role and showing spirit beyond his years and at a tough time for the club. But he also has a lot of development to go in terms of cutting edge.

 

[Zatara]

Ibrahim Sangaré wants to stay at PSV according to reports in the Netherlands. Some folks might be interested to know that in this thread or maybe just @Zatara

Good news for Branthwaite. He'll finally have some protection and I imagine he starts at LCB for them.

Im happy we signed Tarkowski and the MGW deal is exciting.

I cant for the life of me understand why we would be in for Cornet having not progressed the KLP deal. Its bewildering.

The way to go this summer was always young u23 players once we had Tarkowski.

 

[Mozza1987]

He finished 16th after picking us up at 16th but he didnt halt anything he took us backwards in which we needed a 2nd half amazing comeback at home to kin Crystal Palace to take us back out the bottom 3.

Keep puffing your chest out over "super frank" by all means - I'll be very keen to watch your attempts to back peddle if he has us in a similiar position as last season.

How did he take us backwards if he finished in the position he picked us up in lol? He got left an absolute mess and somehow kept us up.

 

[ProZ]

Imagine paying 30m for Zinchenko what an awful player, Mikel has had his trousers pulled down the manikan faced blert

 

[GP_Monty]

Imagine paying 30m for Zinchenko what an awful player, Mikel has had his trousers pulled down the manikan faced blert

Got a proper hard-on for Cities worst players hasn't he the Lego haired sausage

 

[ProZ]

Tuchel playing hardball when he did not even know what a Broja was last week, thought it was a french roll, the bad bad ming

 

[GP_Monty]

Every transfer window, someone mentions Deulofeu. The lad is absolutely crap, leave him out.

 

[Eggs]