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New Everton Owners: The Friedkin Group

What do we reckon?

  • 👍

    Votes: 858 71.3%
  • 🤷 | 🧀🥪

    Votes: 291 24.2%
  • 👎

    Votes: 54 4.5%

  • Total voters
    1,203
Screenshot_20241219_111456_com_urbanzoo_everton_release_NativeNewsActivity~3.webp


He looks like someone that @chicoazul would use on twitter as a football financial expert working for the New York Times.

I could definitely see this man asking #DYGHOTP
 

To think there was a moment in time where they walked away from the deal and we thought we were going to be bought by some calamity like 777!

Fast forward, here we are with our most preferred owners, moving into the new stadium, with competence finally being brought in at the top of the club... It's just fantastic.

Next task is to boot Dyche into the mersey and there's plenty to look forward to!
 

So, imagine this: Everton’s new prospective owners, all suits and ambition, are sitting in some shiny London office. They’ve done the spreadsheets, the risk assessments, the PR strategies. Someone suggests, “Hey, before we finalise this £600m deal, let’s see what the real fans think.”

And then, like lambs to the slaughter, they log on to GrandOldTeam.com. They’re greeted by a thread ranking Everton players based on how good they’d be at Monopoly. (Gray’s banned, obviously, for flipping the board.) Another thread debates whether Goodison should install heated toilet seats for winter games. Someone else is demanding we sign James Rodriguez back just for the vibes.

But oh, it gets worse. They stumble onto:

“Would You Rather Fight 1 Dyche-Sized Tarkowski or 10 Tarkowski-Sized Dyches?” From @matty1878

A 74-page tactical analysis thread on why Neil Maupay would be world-class if he had knees like prime Roberto Carlos by @Neiler

A poll: Is the real problem the board, the players, or that we haven’t sacrificed a chicken to the Dixie Dean statue recently? (Results are disturbingly close.) by @Kurt.

One of the owners wipes his brow and says, “It’s fine, maybe they’re serious about transfers.” Cue:

“Bring Back Rondon”, where someone has Photoshopped Big Ron into a Pele documentary to prove their point. Another guy is demanding we recall every player we’ve ever loaned out since 2010 “just to see what happens”.

The final straw? A conspiracy thread titled: “Does The Everton Board Really Exist, Or Are We Run By A Magic 8-Ball?” They leave the site shell-shocked, mumbling something about “needing a bigger due diligence budget.”

So lads, if this takeover falls through, we’ll know why. It wasn’t the finances, the fanbase, or even the threat of relegation. It was GrandOldTeam. We’ve outdone ourselves again.





Up the Toffees.
 
The local Newcastle chronicle is rattled ha.
Wow. Strange publication.
"Newcastle United face even more competition in their bid to become "number 1" in the Premier League after Everton's takeover was finally pushed through by the Premier League."

Firstly, we aren't competing with anyone to become "number 1". I hope we do in my lifetime, but such things are a loooong way off.
Secondly, they aren't competing to be "number 1" either. They're competing to get back into the top half of the table, and then competing to get semi-regular European football.

And what's with this "intense rivalry" they talk of?
 

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