Because a lot of people on this forum live in a delusional world where the only barrier to our success is the hiring of the right young hipster manager who will somehow take a group of bottom half players and have them playing top teams off the park home and away on a consistent basis making light of the gaping disparity in resources in a way that no other manager in PL history has done on a consistent basis.
To add to this we’ll get a director of football who will just ignore Everton’s financial regulations position and stock the team with four top quality strikers who are proven scorers of double figures in the PL (just in case the first three get injured of course which should be expected and planned for by the manager and the DOF because it happens everywhere apparently). Naturally the other three top strikers are happy to join a bottom half team to sit on the bench behind the first choice. This principle applies for all positions naturally and we are expected to maintain this top level form even if a majority of our best players are injured.
We’re expected to dominate any PL team who is not in the top 6, even on their own patch, even if we have significant injuries, by virtue of the fact our name is Everton and everyone else is crap. When it comes to the top 6 we’re also expected to beat them away as well despite the significant difference in quality between the teams. If anyone beats us at home regardless of the circumstances it’s an absolute disgrace and a sackable offence.
We have to play attacking football with all moves coming through the fullbacks, but both fullbacks must also be rock solid defensively, the keeper should be great at distribution and shot stopping but if he’s called Pickford this doesn’t count and any other keeper would be preferable regardless of their ability. The strikers and attacking players should be absolutely top quality and linked with top clubs but obviously chose Everton turning down CL football and higher wages.
All our scouting should focus on leagues outside of the PL (apart from the SPL of course) but all arrivals should be risk free and guaranteed to perform in the PL. We have to buy youth players that will develop but we also don’t want them to develop in our first team because they might make mistakes. We don’t want cast offs from top clubs, even if they’re good players, but all signings should have a pedigree and have played at a top level without actually of course ever have played at a top level. We don’t want to scrabble around for cheap loans but simultaneously the manager should use the loan market. We also want to buy in players to replace the ones we sell before we sell them but equally if the DOF sells any players at the end of the window he has to buy replacements even if he already brought them in beforehand.
The manager has to play young players, but the good young players that he does play don’t count. Also if a young player has arrived for big money and is an ‘obvious’ talent that anyone could have bought then this does not count as investing in youth. The DOF shouldn’t leave any gaps in the squad for promising youth players like Dobbin and Branthwaite though in case they’re crap so should have bought the promising youth player from Leeds even though he was overpriced. Basically the manager should play youth players more but the ones we’ve bought don’t count, not any from Scotland, and no academy players.
We should operate more like Brighton who buy low and sell their best players, but without actually selling any of our best players of course because we don’t want to be a selling club. We should equally though sell players at the peak of their value like Brighton and Brentford do but Richarlison Gordon Digne Stones Lukaku Barkley Gueye don’t count.
Any manager and DOF who cannot deliver all of the above, immediately, needs to gtfo out of the club