He lives in Yorkshire so I assumed he hates everyone as a matter of course.
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Secret work enemies
- Thread starter JimmyJeffers
- Start date
JimmyJeffers
Player Valuation: £70m
People who keep telling everyone how busy they are full of it. Have loads of pointless meetings all day.
The binman chronicles
Player Valuation: £80m
Can't think of any which has suddenly made me worried if I'm the one! 
ChesterBlue
Player Valuation: £35m
I’ve been avoiding one of the higher ups on Teams for about a week straight now as she’s the angriest woman on the planet and is likely just waiting to go ballistic over something insignificant (she’s a bit of a bully to put it mildly)
Seen as I go to Japan towards the end of October, I’m going to try and go full Solid Snake and avoid her until I get back in November
Seen as I go to Japan towards the end of October, I’m going to try and go full Solid Snake and avoid her until I get back in November
Always tend to have one of these me. One was because he did absolutely nothing yet was beloved by the managers, another because he was just naturally annoying with his quirks (wasn't just me who got wound up, nobody had any patience for him) and the most recent one was again lazy but also really arrogant, wouldn't even acknowledge you if you said hello in the mornings. Smug little tool.
Just how I'm wired I think, I have to project my frustrations onto a colleague even if they've never gone out of their way to be an arsehole to me directly.
Just how I'm wired I think, I have to project my frustrations onto a colleague even if they've never gone out of their way to be an arsehole to me directly.
LEONARD
Player Valuation: £60m
I’ve been training this woman recently on my job and she has the most nauseating, abrasive Birkenhead accent.
She seems nice enough, but her voice makes me want to break things.
Instead of saying ‘hello’ or ‘good morning’ when we start work, she makes this noise like “AAYYEEERRRR”
Birkenhead is our version of the American Deep South.
Shevin Keedy
Player Valuation: £35m
That wouldn't work on me.
Baines' left foot
Player Valuation: £90m
Oh yeah, and how can I forget the maverick manager we had. His surname was Roach, so naturally to me he was Cockroach.
He was the smarmiest most unlikeable man, yet he thought he was loved by everyone. He’d come up to your desk and peer over your shoulder and offer you ‘tips’ which generally consisted of poor advice. He also couldn’t spell to save his life, so some of his emails were quite entertaining. To top it off he ate apples like a shire horse. Mouth wide open, lips smacking and tongue lashing all over his face. Grim.
It’s made me a little bit angry remembering all this lol
He was the smarmiest most unlikeable man, yet he thought he was loved by everyone. He’d come up to your desk and peer over your shoulder and offer you ‘tips’ which generally consisted of poor advice. He also couldn’t spell to save his life, so some of his emails were quite entertaining. To top it off he ate apples like a shire horse. Mouth wide open, lips smacking and tongue lashing all over his face. Grim.
It’s made me a little bit angry remembering all this lol
Full of it or wildly, hopelessly inefficient/wrapped up doing bullshit tasks that just don't matter.
Baines' left foot
Player Valuation: £90m
I very nearly rock and rolled him down an open lift shaft, but it would have resulted in a lot of admin work.
Used to have a lad in work who was playing rugby at Leinster's academy. He used to eat boiled chicken breasts at his desk every morning. The smell made me want to pick up a chair and launch it at him.
Any second half victories against your new, secret work enemy JJ?
JimmyJeffers
Player Valuation: £70m
In the office tomorrow JS, having a few beers in town tonight as well. It’s the perfect storm.