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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

being serious for a moment are there any medicaly trained people out there? had a few drinks tonight and got blood test tomorrow will it make any difference to what they need for my chemo Monday?
 
wbn61 said:
I hope I don't sound flippant but everton is (outside family, sometimes not lol) the most important thing in my life,i t has affected my life dramatically, through school, marriage, work etc. when push came to shove everton won. they (we if I can be presumptuous) determine most things affecting my life.
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Everton is in the blood thats for sure.
I am lucky as i lived through the 80's when we were the best and your right it affects your life in different ways.
I hope your results come back good mate
 
Well, I've had a mental (not excusing the pun) couple of weeks. Had my venlafaxine increased to its maximum dosage without more concentrated care. I feel like I am on the edge of something- god knows what it is. I have to say to people touching on Everton having such an effect- have to agree to some extent. Today I feel absolutely horrible.

Anyway- started the night of the Leicester game for me. Got home and was nervous for an examination at the hospital the next morning. Talked to my stepdad about it and whether he was able to go with me. Long story short he was already in a bad mood (my nephew had broke his laptop earlier in the day and my stepdad has serious anger management issues.) He flew off the rail telling me I use and use him. This tipped me over the edge- I responded by telling him I'm scared of ever talking to him for fear of being attacked. He once chased me and my brother around the house with a knife when I was 10 (I'm now 27.) Anyway, I had a bit of a breakdown and began to start banging my head against the wall. My stepdad stood up, shouting how much of a disappointment to the family I was. He then started to strangle me- in my haze I was begging him not to stop, holding his hands to my throat. He didn't stop, until my mum began to hit him around the head. All a bit crazy, and I spent the next week at a friend's. He eventually apologised. Still can't look at him in the face though.

This was at a time when college work was well and truly building up yet again. This was then followed by my sister telling me she was pregnant. I was over the moon, but couldn't feel it. It was too much emotion. A week later, she told me she had a miscarriage. She elected to pass the foetus naturally and consequently has spent the last week or two in bed. My parents have gone away on holiday, so I'm there most days but really don't know what to say or what to do particularly.

Before all of this, about a month ago I was with my nan when she fell over a doorway threshold. She broke her shin, got a gash about 8 inches long which given her age (91) got infected straight away. She spent two weeks at home on IV antibiotics but a month later it still hasn't healed. I'm doing the shopping for her, doing the housework and everything as bar my mum who has her own stresses, there's no one else to do it. Or no one who will.

Now, in the time I manage to get to College, I have a friend who has lost her mother. She is also incredibly intense and has a negative slant on absolutely everything. I understand that, but the other day I told her I need a bit of space given everything going on. She has not reacted well, and self-harmed last night.

I have now 12 essays due in by the end of next week. Things are still all over the place personally. I have just about lost it- my depression isn't even at the forefront anymore. I literally feel as though I'm losing my mind and my spare time is taken up by just vegetating and feeling nervous. I just had to get that written down.

I visited my psychiatrist a couple of months and they feel CBT is no use for me anymore so have left me to my own devices. My doctor has referred me to a psychosexual therapist for my own insecurity/ intimacy issues as I just have no trust for anyone yet love is the thing I desire most from life. Who knows how that's going to work. I'm stuck at home with a stepdad I'm scared at, a mum who is also struggling with everything I am, a nan who is basically housebound. I have no money to move out given I've been aiming to go back to Uni to study Nursing. My sister (one of my best mates in the world) is going through struggles, and my one and only escape- college- is now just as horrible a place to be and I have so much work to catch up on I don't even think I'll get back to Uni.

Giving up here.
 

EvertonRhys said:
Well, I've had a mental (not excusing the pun) couple of weeks. Had my venlafaxine increased to its maximum dosage without more concentrated care. I feel like I am on the edge of something- god knows what it is. I have to say to people touching on Everton having such an effect- have to agree to some extent. Today I feel absolutely horrible.

Anyway- started the night of the Leicester game for me. Got home and was nervous for an examination at the hospital the next morning. Talked to my stepdad about it and whether he was able to go with me. Long story short he was already in a bad mood (my nephew had broke his laptop earlier in the day and my stepdad has serious anger management issues.) He flew off the rail telling me I use and use him. This tipped me over the edge- I responded by telling him I'm scared of ever talking to him for fear of being attacked. He once chased me and my brother around the house with a knife when I was 10 (I'm now 27.) Anyway, I had a bit of a breakdown and began to start banging my head against the wall. My stepdad stood up, shouting how much of a disappointment to the family I was. He then started to strangle me- in my haze I was begging him not to stop, holding his hands to my throat. He didn't stop, until my mum began to hit him around the head. All a bit crazy, and I spent the next week at a friend's. He eventually apologised. Still can't look at him in the face though.

This was at a time when college work was well and truly building up yet again. This was then followed by my sister telling me she was pregnant. I was over the moon, but couldn't feel it. It was too much emotion. A week later, she told me she had a miscarriage. She elected to pass the foetus naturally and consequently has spent the last week or two in bed. My parents have gone away on holiday, so I'm there most days but really don't know what to say or what to do particularly.

Before all of this, about a month ago I was with my nan when she fell over a doorway threshold. She broke her shin, got a gash about 8 inches long which given her age (91) got infected straight away. She spent two weeks at home on IV antibiotics but a month later it still hasn't healed. I'm doing the shopping for her, doing the housework and everything as bar my mum who has her own stresses, there's no one else to do it. Or no one who will.

Now, in the time I manage to get to College, I have a friend who has lost her mother. She is also incredibly intense and has a negative slant on absolutely everything. I understand that, but the other day I told her I need a bit of space given everything going on. She has not reacted well, and self-harmed last night.

I have now 12 essays due in by the end of next week. Things are still all over the place personally. I have just about lost it- my depression isn't even at the forefront anymore. I literally feel as though I'm losing my mind and my spare time is taken up by just vegetating and feeling nervous. I just had to get that written down.

I visited my psychiatrist a couple of months and they feel CBT is no use for me anymore so have left me to my own devices. My doctor has referred me to a psychosexual therapist for my own insecurity/ intimacy issues as I just have no trust for anyone yet love is the thing I desire most from life. Who knows how that's going to work. I'm stuck at home with a stepdad I'm scared at, a mum who is also struggling with everything I am, a nan who is basically housebound. I have no money to move out given I've been aiming to go back to Uni to study Nursing. My sister (one of my best mates in the world) is going through struggles, and my one and only escape- college- is now just as horrible a place to be and I have so much work to catch up on I don't even think I'll get back to Uni.

Giving up here.
Click to expand...
don't think of giving up. I know there's nothing I can say that will help but your reaching out by posting this shows some fight in you. wish there was more I can say.
 
BloeJoggs said:
Thanks roydo, kithnou and COYL25 (and to all those who have liked my post).

I've never been to see a health professional about my depression (hence the undiagnosed comment) because I'm scared of opening up and in my current state of mind, I don't see the point in finding the courage as I don't believe I can be helped. A part of me knows that isn't true but it's not a big enough part of me to take the step of booking a GP appointment, if you know what I mean?

I don't have any friends I could talk to. It's not that they wouldn't understand; I literally have no friends as I've isolated myself for so long. I have family but they seem like they would be old school in their response (e.g. "pull yourself together") if I were to confide in them.

I've felt crap for years, so I've learnt to cope with it somewhat. I have suicidal feelings on a daily basis but have never acted on them thankfully. It's the general apathy I have that really does my head in. I don't work currently and that combined with the lack of social life makes it feel like I'm merely going through the motions every day.

I have a decent idea of who and what is out there to help me but it's getting to the point where I feel ready to ask for help that eludes me.

P.S. - I shall watch your meltdown from a distance. I have to save my energy for a collective Utd one when Van Gaal sends Rooney back to midfield and starts Falcao! ;)
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Dont be a stranger mate. If you look on the home page, we, the forum that is, have Mind as a partner. It is a subject, (Male depression), that the OP lad works in, and was prompted by Gary Speed.

No one in here will judge. But we are not professionals, ( I dont think), but I know, for a fact, that lads have been helped into getting proper help by sometimes just reading this, as well as posting. Let us know how you get on.

@BloeJoggs
 

EvertonRhys said:
Well, I've had a mental (not excusing the pun) couple of weeks. Had my venlafaxine increased to its maximum dosage without more concentrated care. I feel like I am on the edge of something- god knows what it is. I have to say to people touching on Everton having such an effect- have to agree to some extent. Today I feel absolutely horrible.

Anyway- started the night of the Leicester game for me. Got home and was nervous for an examination at the hospital the next morning. Talked to my stepdad about it and whether he was able to go with me. Long story short he was already in a bad mood (my nephew had broke his laptop earlier in the day and my stepdad has serious anger management issues.) He flew off the rail telling me I use and use him. This tipped me over the edge- I responded by telling him I'm scared of ever talking to him for fear of being attacked. He once chased me and my brother around the house with a knife when I was 10 (I'm now 27.) Anyway, I had a bit of a breakdown and began to start banging my head against the wall. My stepdad stood up, shouting how much of a disappointment to the family I was. He then started to strangle me- in my haze I was begging him not to stop, holding his hands to my throat. He didn't stop, until my mum began to hit him around the head. All a bit crazy, and I spent the next week at a friend's. He eventually apologised. Still can't look at him in the face though.

This was at a time when college work was well and truly building up yet again. This was then followed by my sister telling me she was pregnant. I was over the moon, but couldn't feel it. It was too much emotion. A week later, she told me she had a miscarriage. She elected to pass the foetus naturally and consequently has spent the last week or two in bed. My parents have gone away on holiday, so I'm there most days but really don't know what to say or what to do particularly.

Before all of this, about a month ago I was with my nan when she fell over a doorway threshold. She broke her shin, got a gash about 8 inches long which given her age (91) got infected straight away. She spent two weeks at home on IV antibiotics but a month later it still hasn't healed. I'm doing the shopping for her, doing the housework and everything as bar my mum who has her own stresses, there's no one else to do it. Or no one who will.

Now, in the time I manage to get to College, I have a friend who has lost her mother. She is also incredibly intense and has a negative slant on absolutely everything. I understand that, but the other day I told her I need a bit of space given everything going on. She has not reacted well, and self-harmed last night.

I have now 12 essays due in by the end of next week. Things are still all over the place personally. I have just about lost it- my depression isn't even at the forefront anymore. I literally feel as though I'm losing my mind and my spare time is taken up by just vegetating and feeling nervous. I just had to get that written down.

I visited my psychiatrist a couple of months and they feel CBT is no use for me anymore so have left me to my own devices. My doctor has referred me to a psychosexual therapist for my own insecurity/ intimacy issues as I just have no trust for anyone yet love is the thing I desire most from life. Who knows how that's going to work. I'm stuck at home with a stepdad I'm scared at, a mum who is also struggling with everything I am, a nan who is basically housebound. I have no money to move out given I've been aiming to go back to Uni to study Nursing. My sister (one of my best mates in the world) is going through struggles, and my one and only escape- college- is now just as horrible a place to be and I have so much work to catch up on I don't even think I'll get back to Uni.

Giving up here.
Click to expand...

Don't give up. It seems hard now but speaking about it even on here is a brave thing initself.

There's people you can contact and people who will listen help and support you.

Try and stay calm and I hope you slowly start to feel better and get more help.
 
Hi everyone.

Just wanted to drop in and thank everyone for the support I received on mulitple occasions here. It's been a patchy time for me on here and I've been back and forth and promising to be around more often and updating people and generally being rather inconsistent.

A lot of you will know the issues I've been through over the last few months - probably half a year or so now...but I am thankfully in a far, far, FAR better place now and a lot of that is down to the people here.

Thank you. From the bottom of my heart.

Thank you.
 
Durham Toffee said:
Hi everyone.

Just wanted to drop in and thank everyone for the support I received on mulitple occasions here. It's been a patchy time for me on here and I've been back and forth and promising to be around more often and updating people and generally being rather inconsistent.

A lot of you will know the issues I've been through over the last few months - probably half a year or so now...but I am thankfully in a far, far, FAR better place now and a lot of that is down to the people here.

Thank you. From the bottom of my heart.

Thank you.
Click to expand...

That's fantastic to hear mate, if the members of this site contributed just a little to your recovery then that is great.

Most importantly though, you are feeling better, hope that in itself is an inspiration to those here who perhaps are where you where not so long ago.

Take care of yourself, and congratulations!
 

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