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Vintage
Player Valuation: £60m
I have been suffering extremely badly over the last couple of years between my job and social stuff.everything was perfect until then til my world crashed down on me and it was my fault. Always put a brave face and still do to my mates and family but broke down to my father tonight he is literally one one a million. Eventually got it out of me to tell him what has actually been keeping me going over the last 2 years in between the tears. I told him Everton. Even though we as a club are going through absolute crap, the club and the fans have kept me going. The chat, craic and news on GOT. The transfer news or lack of. Looking forward to the matches even though you want to pull every last bead of hair you have during them. Everton you drive me daft but if it wasn't for you and our fellow supporters god knows where I be now
Rita_Poon
Player Valuation: £90m
The best thing you can do
the best thing
is talk it out, bottling it up only makes it worse. Trust me on nothing else, but this.
good for you for reaching out. It's strength to admit you are suffering. Honest.
Vintage
Player Valuation: £60m
Thanks mate. Ya I always knew my dad was a relaxed person but never wanted to bother him with my troubles even though he had a fair idea about them. It was the best thing I have done was open up to him.
The people that love you will surprise you how much they can help
Rita's right. Vulnerability, taking that bit of risk to talk about it, makes ALL the difference.
We, especially men, tend to think suffering in silence, trying to handle "it" on our own, means we are strong. In reality, it means we are scared and most likely don't have a flipping clue.
Being on this forum, speaking up a little bit, can be a great start.
100%
Rita_Poon
Player Valuation: £90m
Helping someone else can be the greatest help to oneself. He's your dad, he doesn't want you to suffer. I'm guessing he was happy to help you and to move you past a problem. It's love, it's caring, it's family.
Vintage
Player Valuation: £60m
Ya mate I see myself as a tough emotionless person. I never intended to be that way but I guess I ended up that way as trying to show no weakness, fear or vulnerability when [Poor language removed] hit the fan but tonight one to one with the oul lad I cried like a baby and he said that he was delighted as he finally found out how I truly felt and not this false positivity I kept going around with
Vintage
Player Valuation: £60m
Ya big time I guess I was so afraid to talk to him proper because I always felt like I let him down and wanted to avoid the tough talk but if I knew how it go back then I would have talked to him about it sooner
Vintage
Player Valuation: £60m
Ya mate I realised 'suffering in silence' is more a defence mechanism about being open and honest and afraid of what people think about you. Well I think that's in my case anyway
dont be afraid to chat away on the forum
And the occasional reminder re vulnerability, and why it's important.
Brene Brown video - watch it, darnit!
Brene Brown video - watch it, darnit!
TOFFEEKNOWS
Player Valuation: Free Transfer
Hello, finally... finally got to do something I've always wanted to do last September (22) and that was to move into and live in a fully self converted van (Citroen relay LWB).
Heaven on wheels it was... Till end of May this year, i was staying in a hotel down south on a two week job with work and received a phone call to tell me the van was a charred ex camper van (burnt out write off).
Don't really remember (or maybe want to) the next two day's i absolutely lost it (my mind, my home and everything i owned)... However i ended up in a m**tal hospital in the north east somewhere near Darlington.
I have suffered short to medium term depression and anger issues in the past since leaving the military in 2010 after 12 1/2 years.
I spent 4 weeks in the secure hospital and was released to a hostel in Bradford and was there for 2 weeks when the security guard came to my room one morning and said I had 30 mins to pack my kit (1 bag) and i was moving on...
1 hr later i was in another hostel in Bradford (very close to the stadium).
I've been here over 2 months now and it's *awesome* i say that because i have a room, it locks and the staff are brilliant, my nurse who i see every two weeks (unless i have daft thoughts) is awesome and she keeps me on the straight and narrow.
Even with my past problems with said issues, looking back to the end of May the time of the fi*e i still cannot think about, truly process and believe it took a very kind van driver that pulled over and physically prevented me from doing...
I'm settled here but only have 3 months left before i have to move on, not a problem as i want to start moving forward and get back to full health and back to work.
It's a hard life...
Heaven on wheels it was... Till end of May this year, i was staying in a hotel down south on a two week job with work and received a phone call to tell me the van was a charred ex camper van (burnt out write off).
Don't really remember (or maybe want to) the next two day's i absolutely lost it (my mind, my home and everything i owned)... However i ended up in a m**tal hospital in the north east somewhere near Darlington.
I have suffered short to medium term depression and anger issues in the past since leaving the military in 2010 after 12 1/2 years.
I spent 4 weeks in the secure hospital and was released to a hostel in Bradford and was there for 2 weeks when the security guard came to my room one morning and said I had 30 mins to pack my kit (1 bag) and i was moving on...
1 hr later i was in another hostel in Bradford (very close to the stadium).
I've been here over 2 months now and it's *awesome* i say that because i have a room, it locks and the staff are brilliant, my nurse who i see every two weeks (unless i have daft thoughts) is awesome and she keeps me on the straight and narrow.
Even with my past problems with said issues, looking back to the end of May the time of the fi*e i still cannot think about, truly process and believe it took a very kind van driver that pulled over and physically prevented me from doing...
I'm settled here but only have 3 months left before i have to move on, not a problem as i want to start moving forward and get back to full health and back to work.
It's a hard life...
You’ve come along way in a short time mate.
No chance of you getting another van with the insurance money, as you obviously loved that lifestyle ?
As you probably know, there‘s tons of places that do conversions and if you wait until the weather turns colder, you may be able to pick up one a bit cheaper
