Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[Woolly Blue]

He's gone past that Woolly. I'm offended on so many levels here.

Mate, you're plainly upset about your friends death, which is very natural, but, unwittingly, you're treading all over peoples feelings here, people who have been closer to whatever your friend was feeling than, hopefully, we'll ever be.

They might be able to shed some light on his state of mind and explain what he might have been thinking.

The hard work done by many good people in this thread and you're trying to undo it all with your bigoted ways. You know people kill themselves over what they read online right?

Course you don't.

Stay calm mate.

 

[mrs the esk]

I'M WATCHING THE AFTERMATH IN REAL TIME !!!

How is this hard for you to understand?

Do not reply to me again. You're highly offensive in your tone and delivery and I see how you like to "talk sense" in the post above.

I appreciate you may be upset, naturally. However claiming that suicide is an act of selfishness in a thread designed to help those who may have suicidal thoughts themselves is hardly appropriate is it?

The whole point of this thread is to be supportive not judgmental, therefore the reaction to your original post is to be expected.

It's ridiculous that such a thread, which has been used extensively beyond GOT as an example of a supportive effort by an online community should descend to this. I hope you agree.

 

[Woolly Blue]

Elong.

Go [Poor language removed] yourself you absolute [Poor language removed].

What an embarrassment you are. What don't you come on down to TX and comfort this family with your bullshit and platitudes.

Sorry Bill, you need to calm down and take some time off this thread.

 

[Groucho]

I don't think this is the place for such an argument.

I'd appreciate the involved parties ceasing this bickering in here thanks.

This thread isn't for that.

 

[DualityNSNO]

I still find those comments hard to believe.

On we go, anyway.

 

[mrs the esk]

Perhaps this thread can be tidied up by removing this argument which has no place in a supportive, non-judgmental community?

 

[mrs the esk]

Can I just let everyone know I have had a private conversation with TX Bill and perhaps the differences expressed are far less than thought. At the end of the day we need to help people who have suicidal thoughts from carrying them out as the consequences of doing so are greater than dealing with the problems causing the thoughts.

Anyone with such thoughts should seek any help available to them including this thread. Getting help will provide a solution, committing suicide only makes the problems worse for those left behind. I suspect that was what Bill was trying to say (albeit he failed to do so).

 

[Walken]

Can I just let everyone know I have had a private conversation with TX Bill and perhaps the differences expressed are far less than thought. At the end of the day we need to help people who have suicidal thoughts from carrying them out as the consequences of doing so are greater than dealing with the problems causing the thoughts.

Anyone with such thoughts should seek any help available to them including this thread. Getting help will provide a solution, committing suicide only makes the problems worse for those left behind. I suspect that was what Bill was trying to say (albeit he failed to do so).

Fair play to both of you for sorting it out, a subject so emotive, the slightest difference of opinion can kick things off

 

[BiggyRat]

You know, to be honest, I used to think a lot like Bill on this. I also felt that it was a selfish act, but my opinion was based on nothing really. I had no direct link to anyone who had taken their own life. No right to formulate any opinion on the matter really.

I can understand how people can see it that way, but I have learned, over time & life experience, that is simply isn't the case, and my former opinion was wrong. It's true that the people left behind are hit hard, there's no doubting that, but the person committing the act must know it (as mentioned earlier) and that's what makes it even harder to do. But, still they do it.

This thread has not, in my recollection, forgotten those left behind. Nor has it underestimated the impact on those family members. But that isn't the main purpose of the thread. The thread is a sounding board, or a 'mate' to have a chat to, or whatever it needs to be for someone in need. I don't recall a blow up quite like this before but please, lets just put that aside as an emotional outburst from numerous parties & move on eh? Lets ensure that anyone who is tentatively having a look at the thread doesn't turn elsewhere.

Everyone is welcome, everyone's opinion is welcome, and everyone deserves respect here.

COYB.

 

[mrs the esk]

You know, to be honest, I used to think a lot like Bill on this. I also felt that it was a selfish act, but my opinion was based on nothing really. I had no direct link to anyone who had taken their own life. No right to formulate any opinion on the matter really.

I can understand how people can see it that way, but I have learned, over time & life experience, that is simply isn't the case, and my former opinion was wrong. It's true that the people left behind are hit hard, there's no doubting that, but the person committing the act must know it (as mentioned earlier) and that's what makes it even harder to do. But, still they do it.

This thread has not, in my recollection, forgotten those left behind. Nor has it underestimated the impact on those family members. But that isn't the main purpose of the thread. The thread is a sounding board, or a 'mate' to have a chat to, or whatever it needs to be for someone in need. I don't recall a blow up quite like this before but please, lets just put that aside as an emotional outburst from numerous parties & move on eh? Lets ensure that anyone who is tentatively having a look at the thread doesn't turn elsewhere.

Everyone is welcome, everyone's opinion is welcome, and everyone deserves respect here.

COYB.

Well said xx

 

[kithnou]

You know, to be honest, I used to think a lot like Bill on this. I also felt that it was a selfish act, but my opinion was based on nothing really. I had no direct link to anyone who had taken their own life. No right to formulate any opinion on the matter really.

I can understand how people can see it that way, but I have learned, over time & life experience, that is simply isn't the case, and my former opinion was wrong. It's true that the people left behind are hit hard, there's no doubting that, but the person committing the act must know it (as mentioned earlier) and that's what makes it even harder to do. But, still they do it.

This thread has not, in my recollection, forgotten those left behind. Nor has it underestimated the impact on those family members. But that isn't the main purpose of the thread. The thread is a sounding board, or a 'mate' to have a chat to, or whatever it needs to be for someone in need. I don't recall a blow up quite like this before but please, lets just put that aside as an emotional outburst from numerous parties & move on eh? Lets ensure that anyone who is tentatively having a look at the thread doesn't turn elsewhere.

Everyone is welcome, everyone's opinion is welcome, and everyone deserves respect here.

COYB.

Well said BiggyRat. I had no education or communication until I came into contact with people and read posts in this thread.
It has proven an education for me and raised my awareness (to be honest, made me realise my lack of awareness actually).

My reaction to the terrible event, after the initial shock subsided, would probably have been similar to Bill's and yours... before one day deciding to read this thread that was always "sitting on top" of the Everton forum.

I feel for Bill. I really do. Him having to see first hand what that family is experiencing must be breaking his heart. Being angry is an initial emotion I am sure. I've followed Bill's post for a few years and always thought he was a good guy.

Let's not be hard on each other in here I say. Lord knows we get stuck into each other enough over our frustrating football club!

Sleep over it everyone and come back calm tomorrow

Kith
xx

 

[degsy]

The reason its lonely there is because all the Kiwis are in Oz!

Me as well now.

Had a week off, went over for the Everton Brisbane game, Innocently trawling the 'net saw a job, applied, got it, managed to kid the guy that I had to give 3 weeks notice, came home, quit job, put house up for rent, arranged for stuff to be shipped over and for the 2 dogs to be air freighted. ( that was a mine field of red tape ) also managed to fill 2 big skips with 17 yrs of accumulated junk, sold both cars and arranged with a friend who bought one to let me have it back until I got on the plane.

wondered why I lost weight, couldn't sleep and would wake up in blue funk in the middle of the night.

sometimes i'm a bit of a spur of the moment guy.

 

[Groucho]

Obviously feelings can be raw in this thread. From time to time that will result in a few cross words but we really don't want to use punitive action - how can someone tell someone else how to feel or react to something? It's all subjective and all parties won't agree all the time.

Hopefully everyone can appreciate that, so this thread can continue being a good place to start seeking the help you may require.

 

[cbpointblank]

This is something close to my heart. I've dealt with depression for years, and always took the "tough through it" approach. Recently, I had a major episode - to the point that I was seconds away from the worst last decision I could've made. Turns out that self medicating with drink for years isn't the best treatment after all.

Instead, I got online and found a place to go. Spent about a month in what I'd describe as the strangest summer camp you'll ever see. It was difficult and awkward and a million other things, but it helped me to finally address things. All I can say to anyone is that there's always a way to get better. Always.

I guess in light of where the discussion has gone, I'll expand a little. The reason why I didn't make that "terrible last decision"? I hadn't locked my door. My friend walked in and found me with about 75 anxiety and sleeping pills neatly arranged on my table next to a (very) large amount of alcohol. This person has known me for almost 20 years, and is basically the only friend who really knew how low I get when these episodes happen. I can tell you right now that if I'd locked that front door - I wouldn't be here right now to post this.

I can't speak for anyone else, obviously - but for me (and I'm assuming others), you're not in your right mind when you come to that point. Not saying that you've lost your marbles or anything, but things are just wrong. And I didn't think of it as selfish, I was thinking of it as removing a burden upon those around me. Now, clearly that's not the case but you just aren't thinking that way when you're staring at that pile of meds and booze and smoking what you think will be your last cigarette.

 

[mrs the esk]

I guess in light of where the discussion has gone, I'll expand a little. The reason why I didn't make that "terrible last decision"? I hadn't locked my door. My friend walked in and found me with about 75 anxiety and sleeping pills neatly arranged on my table next to a (very) large amount of alcohol. This person has known me for almost 20 years, and is basically the only friend who really knew how low I get when these episodes happen. I can tell you right now that if I'd locked that front door - I wouldn't be here right now to post this.

I can't speak for anyone else, obviously - but for me (and I'm assuming others), you're not in your right mind when you come to that point. Not saying that you've lost your marbles or anything, but things are just wrong. And I didn't think of it as selfish, I was thinking of it as removing a burden upon those around me. Now, clearly that's not the case but you just aren't thinking that way when you're staring at that pile of meds and booze and smoking what you think will be your last cigarette.

Gosh, what an incredible post, thank you for sharing. I hope things are on the up for you now, I am sure what you have posted will be a great help to many.