Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

Just an update guys as it's been a while, please excuse the rambling as I'm quite tipsy.

I am seeing the doctor every two weeks although I received a letter from the local NHS psychiatrist today to say that due to them being so busy they've had to put me on a waiting list. Just goes to show that even in my relatively small city I'm not the only person that is suffering. Since seeing my GP though I'm looking forward to the future, trying to do things that will benefit me. As I'm still living at home and not independent due to the cost of it and the lack of employment throughout January because I'm on a zero hour contract, I've decided to go travelling to India next week for a month and then do an intensive driving course upon my return in the hope that this will at least get things moving. (pardon the pun) The happiest I feel is when travelling as that gives me independence, and also gives me some confidence. Weirdly, I feel most anxious when I'm in my home city, as the media's perception of people like myself who do go on jobseekers allowance when I'm not working lowers my confidence even further.

I'm looking forward to the next two months though so hopefully things are starting to pick up for myself :)
 
rascal said:
Just an update guys as it's been a while, please excuse the rambling as I'm quite tipsy.

I am seeing the doctor every two weeks although I received a letter from the local NHS psychiatrist today to say that due to them being so busy they've had to put me on a waiting list. Just goes to show that even in my relatively small city I'm not the only person that is suffering. Since seeing my GP though I'm looking forward to the future, trying to do things that will benefit me. As I'm still living at home and not independent due to the cost of it and the lack of employment throughout January because I'm on a zero hour contract, I've decided to go travelling to India next week for a month and then do an intensive driving course upon my return in the hope that this will at least get things moving. (pardon the pun) The happiest I feel is when travelling as that gives me independence, and also gives me some confidence. Weirdly, I feel most anxious when I'm in my home city, as the media's perception of people like myself who do go on jobseekers allowance when I'm not working lowers my confidence even further.

I'm looking forward to the next two months though so hopefully things are starting to pick up for myself :)
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Great post mate. India sounds amazing. If you get access to the internet pop in and give us some trip updates if you fancy.
Keep the positive attitude ;)
 
rascal said:
Just an update guys as it's been a while, please excuse the rambling as I'm quite tipsy.

I am seeing the doctor every two weeks although I received a letter from the local NHS psychiatrist today to say that due to them being so busy they've had to put me on a waiting list. Just goes to show that even in my relatively small city I'm not the only person that is suffering. Since seeing my GP though I'm looking forward to the future, trying to do things that will benefit me. As I'm still living at home and not independent due to the cost of it and the lack of employment throughout January because I'm on a zero hour contract, I've decided to go travelling to India next week for a month and then do an intensive driving course upon my return in the hope that this will at least get things moving. (pardon the pun) The happiest I feel is when travelling as that gives me independence, and also gives me some confidence. Weirdly, I feel most anxious when I'm in my home city, as the media's perception of people like myself who do go on jobseekers allowance when I'm not working lowers my confidence even further.

I'm looking forward to the next two months though so hopefully things are starting to pick up for myself :)
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Have a good think about that mate whilst away, perhaps your future lies away from your home town. Lot's of us have done exactly that, found themselves when in a new environment where there's no preconceptions or expectations and gone on to enjoy success away from home. Home will always be home but there's no need to tie yourself to it, particularly if it restricts you in any way.
 
kithnou said:
Great post mate. India sounds amazing. If you get access to the internet pop in and give us some trip updates if you fancy.
Keep the positive attitude ;)
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Cheers lid, I certainly shall, most likely on those long train journeys!

The Esk said:
Have a good think about that mate whilst away, perhaps your future lies away from your home town. Lot's of us have done exactly that, found themselves when in a new environment where there's no preconceptions or expectations and gone on to enjoy success away from home. Home will always be home but there's no need to tie yourself to it, particularly if it restricts you in any way.
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I've always wanted to live in a different country but I'm unsure how I would fare given that English is the only language I am fluent in, and would also miss family.
 
rascal said:
Cheers lid, I certainly shall, most likely on those long train journeys!

I've always wanted to live in a different country but I'm unsure how I would fare given that English is the only language I am fluent in, and would also miss family.
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The only way of finding out is to do it mate. It's not a one way ticket - if it doesn't work you can always come back.
 

Thanks everyone for the kind words

What I would say to everyone is - suicide is the biggest killer of young men, and young men are pressured from many angles not to be 'emotional' and 'bottle it up' like a man. Traditional jobs have gone and if you don't apply for enough jobs you can be sanctioned for 12 weeks from your JSA. Women are better at emotional conciliation with groups and can use crying as an emotional release. Men generally have none of this (this is not to downplay suicide amongst women, which is still an issue). If you feel like you cannot cope, do not suffer in silence like I did. Go to your GP, and get help. I was lucky enough to get eventually CBT which really helped me realise how to cope with awful days.

I only realised that there was always a way for things to get better as I phoned the ambulance to tell them I had done something silly. Recognise this and get help earlier than I did, even if you don't think it's that significant IT IS.
 
The Esk said:
The only way of finding out is to do it mate. It's not a one way ticket - if it doesn't work you can always come back.
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@rascal in addition to the above I know loads of people of have moved to a foreign country without speaking the language of the country they're moving to and it doesn't negatively affect their quality of life, and they can take classes while out there to learn enough to get by and meet people in a similar boat etc.
 
Billy Dean said:
@rascal in addition to the above I know loads of people of have moved to a foreign country without speaking the language of the country they're moving to and it doesn't negatively affect their quality of life, and they can take classes while out there to learn enough to get by and meet people in a similar boat etc.
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My mum moved to Greece some 10 years ago knowing absolutely nothing in Greek, and is now a head chef at a tavern (a position she's held for about 6 years now).

It's tough at the start, but as long as your head and motivation are in the right place - it only becomes easier and easier! Good luck mate. :)
 
Just thought i would update on my previous post.

Saw my dad off last night, was all a surreal experience for me! We met up on saturday, went for a pint in the pub where he basically told me why what happened back then happened, which was honest and i was fine with. Had a little unfortunate situation where he decided he wasn't best sleeping in ours (to be fair baby woke up late so would have kept him awake) so it was plenty of travelling to and from town for us all.

All in all i enjoyed it, chatted with him when i had chance to and kinda stepped back to give him time to be grandad as well, my son was crying last night and today because he misses him! The whole thing was surreal and although nature vs nurture was in effect, i saw a few little things we share, from the way we stood to the way he was with the kids, which was wierd in itself lol

Admittedly after he got on the bus last night emotion kida hit me out of nowhere, hadn't really felt anything bar nerves before he came down and once he went it did hit me out of nowhere, even though i wasn't really 'feeling anything' at the time. Had to kinda compose myself a bit back in the house haha

Only other thing is my sister who i knew about is acting more and more jealous and spiteful, randomly sent me a mesage the week he was coming down telling me he said i didnt exist when she was 12, things like that. Almost as if she wanted me to have a go at him once he got here. I am getting along with my other sisters though, chatting on facebook and they do seem keen to meet me in the future so i'm looking forward to that!
 

BlockHead said:
http://www.theguardian.com/healthca...erm=147979&subid=13576554&CMP=EMCNEWEML6619I2

I'd urge everyone to read this article from todays' Guardian - it illustrates the plight of our junior doctors and the pressures they work under and depression that can/does affect some.
Not a pleasant read, but one I think needs to be made.
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Great article. Two of my mates are married to GP's who chose to become GP's over the " glamour " jobs in hospital for the very reasons laid out in this article.
 
BiggyRat said:
Thanks for the update. That's a great experience you have described there. Good on you for having the intestinal fortitude to forge ahead despite some pettiness. I wish you all well! ;)
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See the funny thing is my and my eldest sister are complete contrasts in that respect. Where i was happy to put the past behind us as he was making an effort and was honest about the reasons behind it, my sister who has been in contact with him all her life has a massive chip on her shoulder. In her eyes her other sisters have the life she never had and she is jealous of that, and her mum is pretty much the opposite of his wife. It is sad to see but it just means i can enjoy this time whilst she is paranoid enough to think everyone is against her, including the thought of her losing me to them, if that makes sense.

all in all it is nice to have the extra family now, and they are all happy that i have come into their lives which has been a massive relief to me! And i could see it in the way my dad was with the kids, more and more comfortable as the visit went on, on monday he was very relaxed and in a way acted like he had been round a lot more often than a few days.
 
Ashtonian said:
See the funny thing is my and my eldest sister are complete contrasts in that respect. Where i was happy to put the past behind us as he was making an effort and was honest about the reasons behind it, my sister who has been in contact with him all her life has a massive chip on her shoulder. In her eyes her other sisters have the life she never had and she is jealous of that, and her mum is pretty much the opposite of his wife. It is sad to see but it just means i can enjoy this time whilst she is paranoid enough to think everyone is against her, including the thought of her losing me to them, if that makes sense.

all in all it is nice to have the extra family now, and they are all happy that i have come into their lives which has been a massive relief to me! And i could see it in the way my dad was with the kids, more and more comfortable as the visit went on, on monday he was very relaxed and in a way acted like he had been round a lot more often than a few days.
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It's almost like a strange version of the Prodigal Son in a way.

Also, it is a rare gift you have in being able to put something, so massive in your life, behind you! Your kids are in good hands!

;);)
 

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