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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

Kiwi said:
It's been a long time since I last posted in this thread, it really is fantastic for providing support for those who need it.
I guess I'm posting here because in large patches over the last year and a half, I've felt an overwhelming ennui about uni and life in general.
It first came about last year, when my friends and support groups at uni simultaneously fell apart as they all dropped out of uni. The uni class is very big and very friendly, but I found myself on the fringes without anyone I felt I actually was closeish too. I knew most people and could say hi and have a conversation, but was on the fringes of the social cliques that had been formed. I somehow scraped through my exams and the summer break was much better, I got a job with one of my best mates and felt as though I actually had a purpose.
That carried me through to about March this year and I was feeling much more engaged and enjoying my course when my closest mate went through some real financial and family issues and has point blank refused to talk about it or even talk to us, causing my mates and the friendship there-in to all fall apart. Now it's like deja vu, and I'm finding myself falling into that disengagement in life and uni again.
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I feel this very similar to what I'm going through. Uni was very much like that for me too. Can't really enjoys films about uni or crazy college flicks without feeling a bit annoyed by it all. Im am one the lucky students literally a year before the change of tuition fees when I deferred for a year and came back to a different year group was a bit better to be honest but god feel so sorry for thoose who have done a art course and paid 9 grand year for, kin hate this fact so much. I hope ur mate gets better kiwi I don't know what to say that could help just that friends are so important especially ones with flaws and baggage they are worth it
 
wbn61 said:
Forgot to mention something that brought a smile and a tear to my eye today, my 4 1/2 yr old grand daughter did one of those cancer race for life days in school yesterday and she had to come and see me and show me her medal and certificate " I raced for my taid " . She wanted me to put it on my wall. The joy, naivety and innocence of children just makes things worthwhile.
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Lovely, it's nice that Nain and Taid are still going strong, much better than the South Wales equivalents :-)
 
Not a bad night had by all, suffering for it now tho lol. it's so hard trying to look after 2 drunken women.:whip:. They were pulling me all ways hugs and making me dance etc I endured it but got too painful in the end. We've all been there I suppose (and you lovely ladies with drunken men;)).

on a side note; I have noticed in numerous posts that going to university seems to be causing a lot of stress and anxiety for many people, just an observation not a comment.
 
wbn61 said:
Not a bad night had by all, suffering for it now tho lol. it's so hard trying to look after 2 drunken women.:whip:. They were pulling me all ways hugs and making me dance etc I endured it but got too painful in the end. We've all been there I suppose (and you lovely ladies with drunken men;)).

on a side note; I have noticed in numerous posts that going to university seems to be causing a lot of stress and anxiety for many people, just an observation not a comment.
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A consequence of a society that places more importance on being "successful" through academia rather than just being happy. Instead of teaching children practical life skills and guiding them to be comfortable with themselves, we make their life all about levels, grades and exams.

p.s. Glad you enjoyed your night!
 

Kiwi said:
It's been a long time since I last posted in this thread, it really is fantastic for providing support for those who need it.
I guess I'm posting here because in large patches over the last year and a half, I've felt an overwhelming ennui about uni and life in general.
It first came about last year, when my friends and support groups at uni simultaneously fell apart as they all dropped out of uni. The uni class is very big and very friendly, but I found myself on the fringes without anyone I felt I actually was closeish too. I knew most people and could say hi and have a conversation, but was on the fringes of the social cliques that had been formed. I somehow scraped through my exams and the summer break was much better, I got a job with one of my best mates and felt as though I actually had a purpose.
That carried me through to about March this year and I was feeling much more engaged and enjoying my course when my closest mate went through some real financial and family issues and has point blank refused to talk about it or even talk to us, causing my mates and the friendship there-in to all fall apart. Now it's like deja vu, and I'm finding myself falling into that disengagement in life and uni again.
Click to expand...


Just think of your degree as a passport. It basically allows you to travel overseas to work (which is needed in a lot of places).....once you get your 1st job no one asks what you got in your degree they just see that you have "done your time".

Also, it shows you can look after yourself alone + same as living overseas alone.....you look like a rounded person who can look after themself and wont suddenly spontaniously combust after being hired.

As for uni mates etc....yes some may become close over the 3 years but most likely is that you wont keep in touch down the track.

My advice is to look for friends outside Uni. Well not look for friends but look for things to do....like joining a sports club with team games....

I did that and found i was out witb the sports club guys every weekend and after midweek training and because of that was more relaxed at uni and ended up dating a stunning girl on my course because i wasnt chasing new friends.....and didnt look desperate :)

it will all come together for you but look at these times of isolation as giving you some time to explore things you want to do....soob you will have mates dragging you off to do things you dont want and a gf who nags you all the time.

Make the most of it....relax and remember not to waste your youth as you will look back regretting not trying new things....
 
USABlue said:
Yeah im trying to look around but sadly all im qualified for is this. If it wasnt about to be summer i could just go back to substitute teaching as thats what i was doing previoudly. Have to find something for the summer
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It sounds like you are too emotionally invested in your job. Thats great if you enjoy it but a living hell if you dont.

When you say thats all your qualified for, are there any transferrable skills or any other fields you could move into?

Wouldnt worry about it...short term...just try and map out what else you can do and other options you may habe and see aomeone else for advice outside your current workplace...


Word to the wise....

NEVER EVER trust people working in HR.
 
Zatara said:
It sounds like you are too emotionally invested in your job. Thats great if you enjoy it but a living hell if you dont.

When you say thats all your qualified for, are there any transferrable skills or any other fields you could move into?

Wouldnt worry about it...short term...just try and map out what else you can do and other options you may habe and see aomeone else for advice outside your current workplace...


Word to the wise....

NEVER EVER trust people working in HR.
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Honestly I'm not sure, i went to school for psychology so not sure where i can use thay outside of whay im currently doing. I did enjoy substitute teaching so im considering looking into going back to school to get certified for teaching possibly.
 
USABlue said:
Honestly I'm not sure, i went to school for psychology so not sure where i can use thay outside of whay im currently doing. I did enjoy substitute teaching so im considering looking into going back to school to get certified for teaching possibly.
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We hired a girl who had a degree +masters in psychology for a sales role in an asian finance company.

Definitelty a good fit for sales...as you could know the psychology of the client OR client services / customer relations...etc etc

A people facing front office job.
 

TheAlmightyFloater said:
A consequence of a society that places more importance on being "successful" through academia rather than just being happy. Instead of teaching children practical life skills and guiding them to be comfortable with themselves, we make their life all about levels, grades and exams.

p.s. Glad you enjoyed your night!
Click to expand...
Bingo! You've just won the internet with that!

It's so true. We used to have Tech colleges that kids could elect to go to in lieu of Uni etc. They could learn a trade there & get on with their life. I know they still exist in some form or another, but the emphasis is so weighted to Uni that they feel like failures if they don't go there. Insane.
 
Kiwi said:
It's been a long time since I last posted in this thread, it really is fantastic for providing support for those who need it.
I guess I'm posting here because in large patches over the last year and a half, I've felt an overwhelming ennui about uni and life in general.
It first came about last year, when my friends and support groups at uni simultaneously fell apart as they all dropped out of uni. The uni class is very big and very friendly, but I found myself on the fringes without anyone I felt I actually was closeish too. I knew most people and could say hi and have a conversation, but was on the fringes of the social cliques that had been formed. I somehow scraped through my exams and the summer break was much better, I got a job with one of my best mates and felt as though I actually had a purpose.
That carried me through to about March this year and I was feeling much more engaged and enjoying my course when my closest mate went through some real financial and family issues and has point blank refused to talk about it or even talk to us, causing my mates and the friendship there-in to all fall apart. Now it's like deja vu, and I'm finding myself falling into that disengagement in life and uni again.
Click to expand...

What year of study are you in, lid?
 
Kiwi said:
It's been a long time since I last posted in this thread, it really is fantastic for providing support for those who need it.
I guess I'm posting here because in large patches over the last year and a half, I've felt an overwhelming ennui about uni and life in general.
It first came about last year, when my friends and support groups at uni simultaneously fell apart as they all dropped out of uni. The uni class is very big and very friendly, but I found myself on the fringes without anyone I felt I actually was closeish too. I knew most people and could say hi and have a conversation, but was on the fringes of the social cliques that had been formed. I somehow scraped through my exams and the summer break was much better, I got a job with one of my best mates and felt as though I actually had a purpose.
That carried me through to about March this year and I was feeling much more engaged and enjoying my course when my closest mate went through some real financial and family issues and has point blank refused to talk about it or even talk to us, causing my mates and the friendship there-in to all fall apart. Now it's like deja vu, and I'm finding myself falling into that disengagement in life and uni again.
Click to expand...

Keep your chin up lad. Join some sports club or activity. Or a hobby, computer games or routine you have fun with. Nothing illegal please.

Take your mind off school or work. As for your friend, stick with him even if he's not talking.
He needs emotional support and your presence alone will help.
I don't know what he is thinking, but not everyone can or want to talk about their crisis, to friends or to family.

A friend in need is a friend indeed.

People come and go in your life. If they stay and make happy times for you, great. Else, look ahead for a new day.
 

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