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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

SiEdmo said:
Just thought id pop in to see whats going on as im having a really bad time of it myself at the minute, managed to get a hold on my depression/anger/stuck in a rut feeling, but we have a baby on the way, and im really worried that my head is going to mess me up and I wont care about the baby

when I found out we were expecting again (we lost one the first time) I have not been anything but hesitant to get excited for fear of it going wrong, now she is going on 6 months pregnant, I can finally start to think about it going right and having a new addition soon, but now as I said, I have irrational thoughts that im not going to bond/care about him

ive made an appointment at the docs (second time ive ever seeked professional help) and really hope I don't get palmed off with some internet PDF self help guides like last time

anyone else had anything similar go on?
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There should be someone who can support parents such as yourself mate.

Your GP may or may not know about any help you can get, so I`d have a look and see if you can find anything online first - pre armed and all that. At least you won`t be getting fobbed off if you already have the info.
 
SiEdmo said:
Just thought id pop in to see whats going on as im having a really bad time of it myself at the minute, managed to get a hold on my depression/anger/stuck in a rut feeling, but we have a baby on the way, and im really worried that my head is going to mess me up and I wont care about the baby

when I found out we were expecting again (we lost one the first time) I have not been anything but hesitant to get excited for fear of it going wrong, now she is going on 6 months pregnant, I can finally start to think about it going right and having a new addition soon, but now as I said, I have irrational thoughts that im not going to bond/care about him

ive made an appointment at the docs (second time ive ever seeked professional help) and really hope I don't get palmed off with some internet PDF self help guides like last time

anyone else had anything similar go on?
Click to expand...

To be honest, given your earlier miscarriage, its not irrational at all to have worries about your new baby. Its normal. The responsibility is probably weighing on you too...a new little life depending on a new Dad who also has his 'new Mum' partner depending on him too. But you know, theres always the other side of things. The baby's arrival will possibly be just the thing you need...give you the impetus to start a new way of life....after all you'll be a family then and not just a couple as now. You wont have time to worry about that rut,by the way, never mind being in it ! As @COYBL25 advises though, professional help will be close to hand should you feel you really need it both ante and post natal.
 
SiEdmo said:
Just thought id pop in to see whats going on as im having a really bad time of it myself at the minute, managed to get a hold on my depression/anger/stuck in a rut feeling, but we have a baby on the way, and im really worried that my head is going to mess me up and I wont care about the baby

when I found out we were expecting again (we lost one the first time) I have not been anything but hesitant to get excited for fear of it going wrong, now she is going on 6 months pregnant, I can finally start to think about it going right and having a new addition soon, but now as I said, I have irrational thoughts that im not going to bond/care about him

ive made an appointment at the docs (second time ive ever seeked professional help) and really hope I don't get palmed off with some internet PDF self help guides like last time

anyone else had anything similar go on?
Click to expand...
Yep, took us years to fall pregnant and lost it at around 12 weeks, when she got pregnant again i stressed the whole pregnancy over something happening again. Wondered how I'd be as a father since depression/anxiety seemed to consume much of my life at the time. But turned out being the best thing ever mate.
 
Jacob said:
To be honest, given your earlier miscarriage, its not irrational at all to have worries about your new baby. Its normal. The responsibility is probably weighing on you too...a new little life depending on a new Dad who also has his 'new Mum' partner depending on him too. But you know, theres always the other side of things. The baby's arrival will possibly be just the thing you need...give you the impetus to start a new way of life....after all you'll be a family then and not just a couple as now. You wont have time to worry about that rut,by the way, never mind being in it ! As @COYBL25 advises though, professional help will be close to hand should you feel you really need it both ante and post natal.
Click to expand...

yeah I think you may be right, starting to get the house ready soon, so hopefully this new impetus starts then, gots me lots of furniture to build haha, cheers mate
 

cronullasharks said:
Yep, took us years to fall pregnant and lost it at around 12 weeks, when she got pregnant again i stressed the whole pregnancy over something happening again. Wondered how I'd be as a father since depression/anxiety seemed to consume much of my life at the time. But turned out being the best thing ever mate.
Click to expand...

cheers mate, yeah I cant wait but just cant bring myself to be fully excited yet, hopefully all turns out perfect and as you say, its then the best thing ever
 
Jo3Fr3sh said:
So I was wondering if anyone has experience with intense anxiety/depersonalization. Going through the weeds currently.
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What do you mean by depersonalisation mate ?

Do you mean something similar to an" out of body " feeling ?.

( hallucination brought on by extreme anxiety )

If you do, you`re anxiety must be pretty extreme.

Are you getting any help ?
 
COYBL25 said:
What do you mean by depersonalisation mate ?

Do you mean something similar to an" out of body " feeling ?.

( hallucination brought on by extreme anxiety )

If you do, you`re anxiety must be pretty extreme.

Are you getting any help ?
Click to expand...

No, it's like being stunned by being in an anxiety inducing environment. The anxiety gets to be so high you get into like locked into your head/own world. This effects short term memory and basic cognitive functions where you are just in survival mode. This is my work environment. It's basically a toxic office that is extremely passive aggressive.
 
Jo3Fr3sh said:
No, it's like being stunned by being in an anxiety inducing environment. The anxiety gets to be so high you get into like locked into your head/own world. This effects short term memory and basic cognitive functions where you are just in survival mode. This is my work environment. It's basically a toxic office that is extremely passive aggressive.
Click to expand...

I`ve worked in a similar environment mate.

I`d come into work on Monday and at least one person had left / resigned the Friday before.

The only solution is to leave or you could end up very ill as a result.

You`re body is in constant " fight or flight " mode, which can be very bad for your long term health, if it`s prolonged.

I bet you don`t sleep too well either ?
 
COYBL25 said:
I`ve worked in a similar environment mate.

I`d come into work on Monday and at least one person had left / resigned the Friday before.

The only solution is to leave or you could end up very ill as a result.

You`re body is in constant " fight or flight " mode, which can be very bad for your long term health, if it`s prolonged.

I bet you don`t sleep too well either ?
Click to expand...

No I don't. Leave and do what is the question.
 

Jo3Fr3sh said:
No I don't. Leave and do what is the question.
Click to expand...

Something else ??????

If you go back through some of the posts in here, there`s quite a few lads on here that have suffered problems, due to either the job they were in or the people around them in the job.

Health or wealth mate.

I left a relatively well paid job, in a horrible firm, due to what it was doing to me and by default my family ( my youngest is disabled and we were going through a lot with him, my work couldn`t have given a flying one ).

It`s a bottle tester mate, but if you`re job is making you ill, there`s only one thing to do.
 
Hi. Been following the club on here for many years but started following this thread about 7 months ago after being diagnosed with depression. Have left some posts and received lots of positive help and comments. I'm hopeing to return to work soon. My advice for anybody who finds themselves in the same position is to set yourself a project. I've spent a few months decorating our house. Painted every room. Gave me a reason to get up, had to go out to buy paint, my boys and wife love it and it's made me feel like I've done something positive that lots of people appreciate and have commented on. A bit of self worth and confidence for me. Seven months gone, still taking the AD's but I feel so much better and ready to get back to 'normal life'. Stick with it lads. There are better times ahead COYB
 

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