Install the app
How to install the app on iOS

Follow along with the video below to see how to install our site as a web app on your home screen.

Note: This feature may not be available in some browsers.

 

Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

EFCPaul said:
Suffering my worst spiral for ages.

This week has been fine, good even, there's been no issues or carry over from last week so I felt no need to post anything. That all changed an hour or so ago.

Was processing an order, it confused me a tiny bit, wasnt sure who to tag on an email to send it too. Called my superior to ask her (the order had her name on) and she told me it's not her who was dealing with it. Called the correct person but the line was engaged. I looked at my screen and saw only certain people mentioned on the order form so rather than wait I thought I'd just send it over and if something was amiss they'd inform and I'd amend it swiftly, it was no big thing.

A few minutes later a colleague emails me basically telling it me it was wrong and it was being passed back. The email itself, to me at least, came across as a tad condescending ("you need to read things more carefully"). A few minutes later the said superior sends an email to me as well, this one quite long, and it was more or less the same. "We expect errors like this during training but not at this point".

It all P'd me off to no end. Like actually steaming mad, even worse than last week. I was so fuming I didnt even reply to their emails, I just sat in utter silence for the final half hour or so before we all finished. When home time came I quickly scuttled out and barely said bye.

I feel so, so negative. A mixture of anger/sadness. All the signals in my head only point to this all only ending one way and to be honest if I hadnt paid my course fees already for the counselling at a place very close by I would seriously give consideration about whether I should look elsewhere. Tonight is going to be very hard, tomorrow probably even worse when they bring the whole thing up (surely they will because I blanked their messages). The anger will come flooding back and it will take every bit of self control I have to not let rip and speak my mind but if I do that I'll be cutting off my nose to spite my face.

I want to cry.
Click to expand...

You made a mistake mate, all you can do is learn from it.

If it was me, and I appreciate we'll all different, I'd take it on the chin, and drop the colleague and your superior an email next week apologising for the mistake and say you'll do your best to learn from the mistake.
 
EFCPaul said:
Nothing ultimately happened, they finished their meeting and everyone did their final bits before home time. Got to think if there was a serious problem they'd have said something to me, they took the time to call the other girl but not me.

My nerves are gone but I'm trying to convince myself I'm just completely overthinking it all because of anxiety. I love it there and I want more than anything to be the worker they need me to be. Hopefully they still have faith. Thanks for asking mate. :)
Click to expand...
I think @efcforever has it right, somebody else got their arse kicked and was just passing it on to make themselves feel better.
I've spoken to bosses on the quiet and asked them why they do this sort of stuff and its mostly;
a) because they can and they'd forgotten it by the time they've gone home...its just reflex, like a player kicking the ball out, then putting his hand up - our ball Reff.
b) They try to pull some stroke or other...if it comes off, they've one over on you, win for them. If you kick back and fight them on it, they say ok fair enough sorry, then its back to status quo, they're no worse off and you've had to fight to get back what you already had - they can't lose which ever way it goes.
c) Every so often some like to make a big song and dance about something and nothing, thump the table, threaten dire consequences, generally try to put the fear of god into you to make you work harder.

Like you say, don't over think it, arseholes be arseholes, its what they do.
 
EFCPaul said:
Nothing ultimately happened, they finished their meeting and everyone did their final bits before home time. Got to think if there was a serious problem they'd have said something to me, they took the time to call the other girl but not me.

My nerves are gone but I'm trying to convince myself I'm just completely overthinking it all because of anxiety. I love it there and I want more than anything to be the worker they need me to be. Hopefully they still have faith. Thanks for asking mate. :)
Click to expand...
Cut and paste this conversation and mail it to them to let them see how you feel .Let them see how you feel and the advice you are listening to .
 

@MrD You know its my after the weekend check up! Hows it going? American Football started here in the states so had Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, now Monday for some football. Pretty eventful weekend with all the little get togethers. Hopefully your week is going as good as we last talked. Let us all know and what are your predictions for the Bournemouth game?
 
Not quite mental help but rather than make a thread I wanted to ask here for some job advice.

After getting my final degree grade a couple months ago, not had much luck in finding a job that suits me and I suit it. Did find one on Friday though and sent in my CV, it honestly sounds a perfect fit.
Today while I was showering I had a missed call and voicemail from them wanting to talk about my application and potential opportunities and to call them, I called back shorty after and that also went to voicemail. Left a pretty generic message saying sorry I missed the call but I would be available for a callback at any time but haven't had anything since. Now I'm a bit confused, is the impetus on me to try and call them again, or should I be patient? I'm inexperienced in the professional world so not sure what the etiquette is for to-and-fro missed calls/voicemails like this?
 

Zezti said:
Not quite mental help but rather than make a thread I wanted to ask here for some job advice.

After getting my final degree grade a couple months ago, not had much luck in finding a job that suits me and I suit it. Did find one on Friday though and sent in my CV, it honestly sounds a perfect fit.
Today while I was showering I had a missed call and voicemail from them wanting to talk about my application and potential opportunities and to call them, I called back shorty after and that also went to voicemail. Left a pretty generic message saying sorry I missed the call but I would be available for a callback at any time but haven't had anything since. Now I'm a bit confused, is the impetus on me to try and call them again, or should I be patient? I'm inexperienced in the professional world so not sure what the etiquette is for to-and-fro missed calls/voicemails like this?
Click to expand...

I'd give them a call again at lunchtime tomorrow if you've not had a call back, gives them plenty of time to have returned your call. Just say you left a message yesterday and just wanted to follow up, I've worked in places where they don't bother checking voicemail for days so it won't do any harm to make sure you haven't been forgotten.
 
Zezti said:
Not quite mental help but rather than make a thread I wanted to ask here for some job advice.

After getting my final degree grade a couple months ago, not had much luck in finding a job that suits me and I suit it. Did find one on Friday though and sent in my CV, it honestly sounds a perfect fit.
Today while I was showering I had a missed call and voicemail from them wanting to talk about my application and potential opportunities and to call them, I called back shorty after and that also went to voicemail. Left a pretty generic message saying sorry I missed the call but I would be available for a callback at any time but haven't had anything since. Now I'm a bit confused, is the impetus on me to try and call them again, or should I be patient? I'm inexperienced in the professional world so not sure what the etiquette is for to-and-fro missed calls/voicemails like this?
Click to expand...

The key question here is whether you applied to a job via a direct employer or was it via a recruitment agency / third party?

The reason i ask is because the follow-up will likely need to be different to achieve the desired results.
 
The latest stage of my story has seen me attending two sessions of face to face therapy in an attempt to rid me of my acute anxiety.
This is my first such experience and didn't know what to expect. I was ushered into a room by my therapist. I was asked to have filled in the forms used to measure the depth of my feelings. He took the scores and they showed what I hoped they would, and showed a vast improvement. The main source of my anxiety is due to me not having adapted to retirement and the lack of day to day companionship. A couple of suggestions have been made which I am considering.
The main reason for posting is to say that my scepticism of mental health services has well and truly been removed. These people actually know what they are doing in an non judgemental and sympathetic manner and it would be folly to dismiss their efforts to help you through the dark times.
 
tommytowne said:
The latest stage of my story has seen me attending two sessions of face to face therapy in an attempt to rid me of my acute anxiety.
This is my first such experience and didn't know what to expect. I was ushered into a room by my therapist. I was asked to have filled in the forms used to measure the depth of my feelings. He took the scores and they showed what I hoped they would, and showed a vast improvement. The main source of my anxiety is due to me not having adapted to retirement and the lack of day to day companionship. A couple of suggestions have been made which I am considering.
The main reason for posting is to say that my scepticism of mental health services has well and truly been removed. These people actually know what they are doing in an non judgemental and sympathetic manner and it would be folly to dismiss their efforts to help you through the dark times.
Click to expand...
Well if you ever feeling down and needing some one to kick a can around with you, just shoot me a DM. Ill talk just about anything from football, other sporths, politics anything :) Glad to see it helped though!
 

Welcome to GrandOldTeam

Get involved. Registration is simple and free.

Register
Back
Top