Most you've ever disappointed your partner

[Donald Twain]

After sex, instead of going with the more conventional "that was amazing" or "you're so beautiful" I opted for:
"Cheers for that"

Smooth!

 

[Yorkie]

Smooth!

It made it so much worse because I'd called by hers drunk after a night out. What I believe our American cousins refer to as a "booty call"

She took it well, but quipped "you might as well leave £20 on the dresser next time if that's the way you think of me" (with the venom in her tone suggesting there probably wouldn't be a "next time")

Again, I struck with "£15 and you've got a deal"

Was younger, drunker and colder than I am now.

 

[Dithering Dougie]

Once got that drunk I took a wrong turn and got into bed with a girlfriends parents, on the Mars side, then started cuddling her boobs. Her arl man filled me in and flung me out naked. The following morning he went round to my parents house and said I was a beast, resulting in a fight between him and my arl man. ( which I missed as I was still drunk in bed ).

Another time fell asleep bladdered on top another young lady whilst doing the deed and her house mates had to physically lift me off her. I woke up naked in the front garden with my clothes on top of me a few hours later.

I would like to add that I am not proud of either incident, especially the last one as the girl was a stunner.

Did that with a girlfriends mate who was staying at hers in the spare room and who to be honest was fitter and I'd been flirting with all night. Made worse by earlier in the evening joking with my then girlfriend we could fulfill a fantasy of mine.

 

[mrs the esk]

It is a wonder any of you are in a relationship

 

[COYBL25]

Did that with a girlfriends mate who was staying at hers in the spare room and who to be honest was fitter and I'd been flirting with all night. Made worse by earlier in the evening joking with my then girlfriend we could fulfill a fantasy of mine.

That's only half the story, did you're fantasy come true !

 

[COYBL25]

It is a wonder any of you are in a relationship

I suspect most people's current partners are unaware of their other halves dark and shameful past

 

[Dithering Dougie]

That's only half the story, did you're fantasy come true !

Haha, God no.

Poor woman got the shock of her life and so did I when she started screaming think someone had broken in and was about to attack her.

 

[COYBL25]

Haha, God no.

Poor woman got the shock of her life and so did I when she started screaming think someone had broken in and was about to attack her.

Ha ha, similar to my experience except my girlfriends dad was on the other side of the bed.

A lad I knew had a drunken bowel movement whilst in bed with his then girlfriend !

 

[l4toffee]

Bump

This thread can't slip off the first page .

 

[Kurt.]

Ha ha, similar to my experience except my girlfriends dad was on the other side of the bed.

A lad I knew had a drunken bowel movement whilst in bed with his then girlfriend !

there is a famous story about this in the vaults.... I can't recall from who


@chicoazul

 

[Woolly Blue]

It is a wonder any of you are in a relationship

@The Esk's deleted his post.

 

[roydo]

Oh Christ.

*engages dont post after beer button*

 

[Norwegian Cow]

I told my wife how I REALLY tought she looked like in a dress she had just bought.

 

[Whistlin' Dixie]

I told my wife how I REALLY tought she looked like in a dress she had just bought.

So did I when she showed me what she looked like in her birthday suit...

"Needs a bloody good ironing" is not the correct answer

 

[COYB]

Got caught having a tug over Reddit gonewild in a hotel by London Euston once, she woke up so I lashed the iPad and she thought I was wanking over Ronnie o Sullivan in the world snooker final. Never lived that down.

ffs thats the funniest thing ive ever read hahahaha in tears