The Mourinho question is a funny one.
I'll preface it by saying that obviously it's INCREDIBLY unlikely that we actually get him.
However, there IS some logic in it. First you have to look at two things, and IF you accept them as true (not saying either is guaranteed, but as a thought exercise):
1) He has said that his next job will be in England. Now obviously this can change, but let's stick with it for a minute.
2) It's looking increasingly unlikely over the last few weeks that he'll be going to Utd. A month or so ago it looked nailed on, but an increasing number of stories seem to be coming out referencing van Gaal still being there next season, the budget he's agreed and the targets he wants. Again, this could all be wrong and José might end up there. But it doesn't seem as signed sealed delivered as it was before.
Now back to us... IF Mourinho doesn't get the Utd job and IF he still wants his next job to be in England... You have to ask the question where is he going to go?
Ok we've been awful this (and last season) but I don't think there's a person in world football (except maybe davek) who doesn't think we've massively underachieved where we should be.
Look at the teams traditionally above us, and ask, is Mourinho likely to end up there?
Chelsea: Conte
Man City: Pep
Arsenal: Wenger unlikely to go anywhere, and if he did he'd likely have a hand in appointing his successor, and he and Mourinho can't STAND each other
Liverpool: Klopp
Man Utd: covered above
Spurs: interesting one. Could see him here if Pochettino got tempted away, and there have been stories about Utd wanting him, but is he really going to want to leave them when they're going to make the CL and possibly even more?
Which sort of leaves José a bit short on options.
All a lot of conjecture, and MASSIVELY unlikely, but there is a small thread of logic. Plus it's nice to daydream about...