Seriously need help here.

[EFCNIK]

Oh god what have I just woken up to...

Kiss her tits xx

 

[FTY]

What the actual ****?

 

[Eric Djemba-Djemba]

As if I missed this.

 

[toffee-fellaini]

A girl is unconscious and the first thing you do is post on an Everton forum. :huh:

 

[bluejock]

She came at you with a knife mate.

Tell the polis that and stick to it.

 

[Millea]

I'm still waiting on the conclusion!

 

[Moomin]

She came at you with a knife mate.

Tell the polis that and stick to it.

Not bad, but the police would want a conviction though.

Best thing to do is pluck her teeth out with pliers, smash them into a million pieces. Gouge her eyes out and burn them. Decaptitate the head and remove the feet and hands from the torso and bury the body parts in various locations around the country.

 

[ijjysmith]

Exactly what I'd do in this situation.

Type out a massive long post on GOT.

EXACTLY WHAT I'D DO

 

[Millea]

Tbh though mate, whoever fitted that curtain rail obviously doesn't watch DIY SOS.

 

[steken1]

Gutted I went out last night now like.

 

[The-Golden-Vision]

make sure you have a magic marker...... ya know a magic marker...... a magic marker, a fukin pen ..a magic marker ffs....




*Pulp fiction is ace.

This is f*cking trippy.

 

[The-Golden-Vision]

BREAKING NEWS. DECO ARRESTED.

 

[Woolly Blue]

Curtain rail collapsed eh ?
I suspect Frank Drebin was involved somehow.

 

[EFCNIK]

Have sex with her corpse whilst it's still warm.

 

[heatmeiser]

Not bad, but the police would want a conviction though.

Best thing to do is pluck her teeth out with pliers, smash them into a million pieces. Gouge her eyes out and burn them. Decaptitate the head and remove the feet and hands from the torso and bury the body parts in various locations around the country.

This is sound advice.

Seriously you need to be thinking of yourself here.