MACCA75
Player Valuation: £70m
I’ve devised a simple questionnaire to give to players before they sign, just to avoid last years fiasco.
1. Are you terrified of your own shadow?
2. Are you a French coward?
3. Do you lay the ball off with one touch regardless of what is happening on the pitch?
4. Do you insist on taking penalties despite having an iffy record from the spot?
5. Are you sure you are a professional footballer?
6. Have you actually been scouted or have we approached you because your crappy European team recently played against us?
7. Does your first touch explain why you have a pitifully low release clause?
8. Have you an unnatural fondness for German hotels?
Should sort things.
1. Are you terrified of your own shadow?
2. Are you a French coward?
3. Do you lay the ball off with one touch regardless of what is happening on the pitch?
4. Do you insist on taking penalties despite having an iffy record from the spot?
5. Are you sure you are a professional footballer?
6. Have you actually been scouted or have we approached you because your crappy European team recently played against us?
7. Does your first touch explain why you have a pitifully low release clause?
8. Have you an unnatural fondness for German hotels?
Should sort things.