Anyone having a worse day than me?

[chrismpw]

1 hour in. Nothing to report. Maybe a bit of mild rumbling.

 

[TGW89]

You'll struggle to find a more effective medication or substance on this earth than the stuff you need to neck before that procedure.

Give it half an hour, I'm sure that's what I read on the packet. Wrong. 5 minutes max and it began. Fast forward 6 or 7 hours and the only time I'd left the throne was to neck the second dose of it. Phone charger cable threaded under the door to give me something to do while I turned inside out.

When it finally subsided a long steaming hot shower to try and feel almost human again, then bed for a night of starvation.

Next morning you're in a gown with a flap on the back to give a man who's made some very questionable career choices easier access to slide a camera up.

About from that it's not bad. Enjoy.

I'm about to take my fifth fluffy dump of the day.... and Beto/DCL are rested/unfit...

 

[chrismpw]

Oh dear lord.

 

[ClausThomsen]

I've watched so many of those videos it's unreal. There's a Youtube channel of some scouse plumbing firm who do them...absolutely hypnotising.

 

[urquattro]

You'll struggle to find a more effective medication or substance on this earth than the stuff you need to neck before that procedure.

Give it half an hour, I'm sure that's what I read on the packet. Wrong. 5 minutes max and it began. Fast forward 6 or 7 hours and the only time I'd left the throne was to neck the second dose of it. Phone charger cable threaded under the door to give me something to do while I turned inside out.

When it finally subsided a long steaming hot shower to try and feel almost human again, then bed for a night of starvation.

Next morning you're in a gown with a flap on the back to give a man who's made some very questionable career choices easier access to slide a camera up.

About from that it's not bad. Enjoy.

As Micky Flanagan says "like a costume of a man".

 

[Dixieslaces]

Oh dear lord.

You have time to type?

 

[LostLegend]

Yikes! Hope all goes well!
Hope you've kept a few bog rolls in the fridge!

Remember, Billy Connolly once said that he hated visiting his proctologist for his yearly check up but "...now I bring him flowers"

 

[chrismpw]

My arse has been turned into a pressure washer.

 

[cronullasharks]

My arse has been turned into a pressure washer.

I've had 3 colonoscopies, had polyps each time so go every 3 years and I think my record is 32 poo's. Mate of mine did 41.

 

[BlueandWhite]

My arse has been turned into a pressure washer.

Godspeed.

 

[RAFUH]

Mate I’ve had that procedure, you are underestimating the impact of that filth they are making you drink. It’s remarkable, drinking it is a form of torture but by god it’s effective. It will be like niagra coming out of your ass. If it didn’t taste so bad I’d do it once a month for colonic irrigation.

This.

I suggest making yourself a comfy spot in the WC. You won't want to be wandering too far.

 

[Daveysgingerlovechild]

A thread for those of us wishing to offload (in my case, literally).

In sure some of you are, for whatever serious reason - but this is my day today:

Tomorrow morning I'm having a routine procedure - an examination - because of family history. Since Saturday I've nit been allowed ANY of my favourite foods. All I've been allowed to eat is beige.

Today at 10 am I ate the last food I'm permitted for 24 hours. At 6pm I have to start drinking a litre of cold wallpaper paste. I will be shitting regularly - the leaflet promises 12-15 toilet visits.

At 5am, amidst broken-toilet-visit-sleep, no doubt, I have to down another litre of slush before more explosive visits to the bog.

At 9am tomorrow I get a camera shoved up my arse and get inflated like a very unhappy balloon. I'm hoping the camera crew is tiny and that there us no need for a sound crew.

In the midst of all this , in case it wasnt bad enough, there's a Derby game.

Cheer me up, for pity's sake.

Women's hourvis cancelled for the month of May.

 

[Hinchcliffe's Corner]

Any chance of a live stream?

I've done a couple of these. Trust me, it'll be streaming at the end.

 

[Hinchcliffe's Corner]

The plus side is in the morning they give you some nice medication to help put you in a good place, you also forget half the procedure, kind of like getting a date rape on the NHS.

 

[ste d' indica]

A thread for those of us wishing to offload (in my case, literally).

In sure some of you are, for whatever serious reason - but this is my day today:

Tomorrow morning I'm having a routine procedure - an examination - because of family history. Since Saturday I've nit been allowed ANY of my favourite foods. All I've been allowed to eat is beige.

Today at 10 am I ate the last food I'm permitted for 24 hours. At 6pm I have to start drinking a litre of cold wallpaper paste. I will be shitting regularly - the leaflet promises 12-15 toilet visits.

At 5am, amidst broken-toilet-visit-sleep, no doubt, I have to down another litre of slush before more explosive visits to the bog.

At 9am tomorrow I get a camera shoved up my arse and get inflated like a very unhappy balloon. I'm hoping the camera crew is tiny and that there us no need for a sound crew.

In the midst of all this , in case it wasnt bad enough, there's a Derby game.

Cheer me up, for pity's sake.

YOU CAN NEVER LEAVE THE BOG AGAIN YOU!!!