Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[Durham Toffee]

When I was diagnosed terminal we did ask what happens next? he just said we can arrange a scan for the future and i'll probably see you in 6 weeks and left for his next patient. my nurse said she would try and arrange for me to see the hospice, then we left. with all the other probs that we had at the time I didn't really think about it but its been there, the waiting, what do I do next? and I think subconsciously it's been one of the reasons I have been struggling. I'm just grateful that I have my nurse and you wonderful people to help me along.

Bad craic that, mate. Absolutely shocking that the NHS don't follow up with greater focus on the mental wellbeing of patients in such situations. As you said, you have us lot at all times at the end of a keyboard. It's not great, but we certainly won't turn our back on you.

I've heard stories....

 

[blueloon]

When I was diagnosed terminal we did ask what happens next? he just said we can arrange a scan for the future and i'll probably see you in 6 weeks and left for his next patient. my nurse said she would try and arrange for me to see the hospice, then we left. with all the other probs that we had at the time I didn't really think about it but its been there, the waiting, what do I do next? and I think subconsciously it's been one of the reasons I have been struggling. I'm just grateful that I have my nurse and you wonderful people to help me along.

Mate you have no idea how much you give back to us with you're courage and inspiration. I'd been quietly fuming about a minor family issue before I logged on, pffft , shrugged off , gone now , life back into proper perspective. As has been said by others let me know if there's any help I can give - maybe a link to a particular charity you're supporting?

 

[EvertonRhys]

It's not mate, it's just that every area has different sets of procedures and policies, which in itself is bonkers.

You're right there mate. Recall quite a few years back now- so not sure if it's still the same- but my Auntie died of throat cancer. In Wales, we have a specific trust- the Velindre NHS trust and I must say from initial diagnosis right until the end she had great community care. It's almost a postcode lottery- much the same with mental health provision. Don't know whether a more centralised approach would be better. IMO though, the problem is there have been so so many shake ups with the NHS over the years, I'm not sure there's any real direction left. Anyway- another argument for another day I guess! Best of luck to you @wbn61. As said by others, you're a huge inspiration! x

 

[flibbyflob]

This is going to be a hard one today (Saturday) as it first birthday of brother since he died. Had a great night tonight with mates and kept quiet about it as didn't want to put downer on things. Meeting my mum in morning with a hangover will be fun but hair of the dog should sort it.

No idea why I posted this. Stupid Everton could have appointed a manager to take my mind off it, guess we may still yet.

 

[kithnou]

This is going to be a hard one today (Saturday) as it first birthday of brother since he died. Had a great night tonight with mates and kept quiet about it as didn't want to put downer on things. Meeting my mum in morning with a hangover will be fun but hair of the dog should sort it.

No idea why I posted this. Stupid Everton could have appointed a manager to take my mind off it, guess we may still yet.

Sorry to read mate. Tough day. All I can think to advise is to not spend it alone? And it's ok to grieve on such a day.

 

[wbn61]

This is going to be a hard one today (Saturday) as it first birthday of brother since he died. Had a great night tonight with mates and kept quiet about it as didn't want to put downer on things. Meeting my mum in morning with a hangover will be fun but hair of the dog should sort it.

No idea why I posted this. Stupid Everton could have appointed a manager to take my mind off it, guess we may still yet.

Not long since the anniversary of my brothers death so I understand, it can be a bit of a weird experience. hope you get through it ok.

 

[BiggyRat]

This is going to be a hard one today (Saturday) as it first birthday of brother since he died. Had a great night tonight with mates and kept quiet about it as didn't want to put downer on things. Meeting my mum in morning with a hangover will be fun but hair of the dog should sort it.

No idea why I posted this. Stupid Everton could have appointed a manager to take my mind off it, guess we may still yet.

My sympathies mate. Remember him well.

 

[wbn61]

Good morning my friends ( or afternoon/evening depending on time zone lol ) what is everyone up to today? We are off to another fund raiser this afternoon for a girl with a tumour. Now don't get me wrong i'm not suddenly on a crusade for charities but someone came to my fund raiser and mentioned this one and I am returning a favour. normally I always used to avoid collections like the plague lol, if a tin was in a shop and there was change i'd put it in but if anyone shook one at me i'd ignore them. I did have 2 direct debits set up for Macmillan and EITC and it hurt me a little bit when I had to cancel them. How about for 1 day today we all give any loose change to a collection tin, I know from last weekend every penny counts and silly as it sounds a good feeling is had raising say 200 as opposed to 100. It helps and that's what we on here are all about, helping others

 

[l4toffee]

Good morning my friends ( or afternoon/evening depending on time zone lol ) what is everyone up to today? We are off to another fund raiser this afternoon for a girl with a tumour. Now don't get me wrong i'm not suddenly on a crusade for charities but someone came to my fund raiser and mentioned this one and I am returning a favour. normally I always used to avoid collections like the plague lol, if a tin was in a shop and there was change i'd put it in but if anyone shook one at me i'd ignore them. I did have 2 direct debits set up for Macmillan and EITC and it hurt me a little bit when I had to cancel them. How about for 1 day today we all give any loose change to a collection tin, I know from last weekend every penny counts and silly as it sounds a good feeling is had raising say 200 as opposed to 100. It helps and that's what we on here are all about, helping others

Good luck today mate

 

[BiggyRat]

Good morning my friends ( or afternoon/evening depending on time zone lol ) what is everyone up to today? We are off to another fund raiser this afternoon for a girl with a tumour. Now don't get me wrong i'm not suddenly on a crusade for charities but someone came to my fund raiser and mentioned this one and I am returning a favour. normally I always used to avoid collections like the plague lol, if a tin was in a shop and there was change i'd put it in but if anyone shook one at me i'd ignore them. I did have 2 direct debits set up for Macmillan and EITC and it hurt me a little bit when I had to cancel them. How about for 1 day today we all give any loose change to a collection tin, I know from last weekend every penny counts and silly as it sounds a good feeling is had raising say 200 as opposed to 100. It helps and that's what we on here are all about, helping others

Don't know if you have this in Blighty but we get a lot of roadside collectors that approach you at the lights. I refuse to support it because I personally feel it's a dangerous practice, but I will make an exception today for you. The Salvo's are out currently so I'll make sure I drop some gold coins in your honour.

 

[COYBL25]

Good morning my friends ( or afternoon/evening depending on time zone lol ) what is everyone up to today? We are off to another fund raiser this afternoon for a girl with a tumour. Now don't get me wrong i'm not suddenly on a crusade for charities but someone came to my fund raiser and mentioned this one and I am returning a favour. normally I always used to avoid collections like the plague lol, if a tin was in a shop and there was change i'd put it in but if anyone shook one at me i'd ignore them. I did have 2 direct debits set up for Macmillan and EITC and it hurt me a little bit when I had to cancel them. How about for 1 day today we all give any loose change to a collection tin, I know from last weekend every penny counts and silly as it sounds a good feeling is had raising say 200 as opposed to 100. It helps and that's what we on here are all about, helping others

Spot on mate, hope you raise loads today and its a good day all round.

 

[Durham Toffee]

This is going to be a hard one today (Saturday) as it first birthday of brother since he died. Had a great night tonight with mates and kept quiet about it as didn't want to put downer on things. Meeting my mum in morning with a hangover will be fun but hair of the dog should sort it.

No idea why I posted this. Stupid Everton could have appointed a manager to take my mind off it, guess we may still yet.

Keep your chin up today, mate. And make sure you post on here later, if you have the chance. Don't be alone - make sure you're with your mam and you keep her strong too, okay?

But have a cry, mate. Take the time to grieve for yourself and for your brother. It hurts, but it's cathartic and it's a necessary part of the process.

Hope you're well.

 

[wbn61]

Spot on mate, hope you raise loads today and its a good day all round.

It's nothing to do with me I am just attending.

 

[larbert toffee]

This is going to be a hard one today (Saturday) as it first birthday of brother since he died. Had a great night tonight with mates and kept quiet about it as didn't want to put downer on things. Meeting my mum in morning with a hangover will be fun but hair of the dog should sort it.

No idea why I posted this. Stupid Everton could have appointed a manager to take my mind off it, guess we may still yet.

You posted it because you felt the need to share your thoughts and the good people of this forum have responded in their usual caring,supportive way which I'm sure has helped you.

I'm glad you had a nice night out with your mates and I hope you have an equally nice day with your mum today.
Take time out to think about your brother this morning before you see your mum as she may need a little support from you in turn.

Good luck Bob and let us know how your day went if you feel the need.

 

[jaycee]

Seen this picture before though a few might be able to relate to it