Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[Abertonian]

rant time. not been too good past few days so taken a while to write this hope it makes sense. last thurs I met with the palliative care macmillan nurse and during that meet I learnt something that confused me a bit, the meaning of "terminal" came up and all that it means is the cancer cannot be cured. and when they say 2 months its just a random figure I think, still need to ask more hence why i'm confused. she even said she has a few she looks after who were diagnosed a year ago. so I think I have been going through this dying thing all wrong. I and everyone else have been waiting for me to go soon so I have been reluctant to make any plans or get involved with any family decisions etc . now I am of the mind to be like everyone else. everyone knows they are going to die but not when, so no one stops planning for the future just in case do they?
well that's what I am going to do from now on. someone on here in the beginning asked me if there was anything I wanted to do before I went and I said I hoped to last to go to the rally we go to every year well we go on thurs, to be honest I didn't think i'd make it thinking the way I did then. the doc said 2 month its nearly 3 month now. I have ordered tickets for the espanyol game and will be getting tickets for the spurs game soon. it's not going to be easy changing mindset but i'm going to give it a good go. going to feel a bit foolish as everyone is waiting for me to go but hope everyone understands.

I've been away this week for uni so not kept up with this thread but think it's great that you are able to go to the rally and look ahead to this coming season. I've never been diagnosed with a terminal illness so forgive my ignorance but I'd think there are two things that can seriously diminish the quality of your life in that situation - pain and mentality. You can only influence one so get busy living.

Have a fantastic time!

 

[Zezti]

I think it was back in November or October last year when I made my first post in this thread. I got a lot of support which made a massive impact. I've decided to give a little update but I have a message at the end for anyone who is going through a really hard time.

Honestly, not a lot has changed with me. I still have only one friend, but as they say, one good friend is worth a hundred who are never there when you need them. I failed my first year of uni (I can pass if I complete and pass these make-up tasks due in August) which, when I found out, got me in quite a state. I was thinking up all kinds of far-fetched, knee-jerk plans (joining the RAF (couldn't apply anyway as I'm asthmatic), moving abroad) and despite it being at 4am, my friend stayed up and talked me down, kept me from applying to anything stupid that I'd regret.

Now I've started asking my university if I can transfer courses (without going back to the first year, because 9 grand is a lot), and although it's unlikely, there's a chance if I convince them I'll be able to do it. I like to think I'm pretty good with words and can sell myself so I'm hopeful. If it turns out I can't, I'm gonna be stuck on this economics course I intensely dislike and struggle with it for another 2 years, no doubt many more stress induced panic "apply to everything stupid" fits.

This Saturday is a pretty big day. It will mark 17 years since my older sister died. She was 16 and had just finished exams, had her prom, and was on holiday with her friend and her friend's parents when she got meningitis. They realised the seriousness too late, she got to the hospital too late and the doctors couldn't treat her before it was too late. She was such a beautiful, kind, caring, sensible, responsible and hardworking girl and me being only a child at the time, she was my idol. She'd take me with her on her paper rounds and I wanted to grow up like her. Not a week goes by where I don't think about her, about the influence she would have had on me as I grew up. There's no doubt whatsoever that I would be a much better person and a better student if she wasn't taken from us. It's a selfish way to look at it, but sometimes I think if it was her or me that was still alive right now, she'd make people more happy and proud than I can.

Here's my message for those who are having a seriously hard time, in particular if you're considering the s-word:
Every one of us has incredible potential. Some get dealt a bad hand and can't realise this potential before they're taken from us. Just don't give up and fold. There's always another option.

 

[Groucho]

I think it was back in November or October last year when I made my first post in this thread. I got a lot of support which made a massive impact. I've decided to give a little update but I have a message at the end for anyone who is going through a really hard time.

Honestly, not a lot has changed with me. I still have only one friend, but as they say, one good friend is worth a hundred who are never there when you need them. I failed my first year of uni (I can pass if I complete and pass these make-up tasks due in August) which, when I found out, got me in quite a state. I was thinking up all kinds of far-fetched, knee-jerk plans (joining the RAF (couldn't apply anyway as I'm asthmatic), moving abroad) and despite it being at 4am, my friend stayed up and talked me down, kept me from applying to anything stupid that I'd regret.

Now I've started asking my university if I can transfer courses (without going back to the first year, because 9 grand is a lot), and although it's unlikely, there's a chance if I convince them I'll be able to do it. I like to think I'm pretty good with words and can sell myself so I'm hopeful. If it turns out I can't, I'm gonna be stuck on this economics course I intensely dislike and struggle with it for another 2 years, no doubt many more stress induced panic "apply to everything stupid" fits.

This Saturday is a pretty big day. It will mark 17 years since my older sister died. She was 16 and had just finished exams, had her prom, and was on holiday with her friend and her friend's parents when she got meningitis. They realised the seriousness too late, she got to the hospital too late and the doctors couldn't treat her before it was too late. She was such a beautiful, kind, caring, sensible, responsible and hardworking girl and me being only a child at the time, she was my idol. She'd take me with her on her paper rounds and I wanted to grow up like her. Not a week goes by where I don't think about her, about the influence she would have had on me as I grew up. There's no doubt whatsoever that I would be a much better person and a better student if she wasn't taken from us. It's a selfish way to look at it, but sometimes I think if it was her or me that was still alive right now, she'd make people more happy and proud than I can.

Here's my message for those who are having a seriously hard time, in particular if you're considering the s-word:
Every one of us has incredible potential. Some get dealt a bad hand and can't realise this potential before they're taken from us. Just don't give up and fold. There's always another option.

Excellent advice at the end there.

 

[COYBL25]

I think it was back in November or October last year when I made my first post in this thread. I got a lot of support which made a massive impact. I've decided to give a little update but I have a message at the end for anyone who is going through a really hard time.

Honestly, not a lot has changed with me. I still have only one friend, but as they say, one good friend is worth a hundred who are never there when you need them. I failed my first year of uni (I can pass if I complete and pass these make-up tasks due in August) which, when I found out, got me in quite a state. I was thinking up all kinds of far-fetched, knee-jerk plans (joining the RAF (couldn't apply anyway as I'm asthmatic), moving abroad) and despite it being at 4am, my friend stayed up and talked me down, kept me from applying to anything stupid that I'd regret.

Now I've started asking my university if I can transfer courses (without going back to the first year, because 9 grand is a lot), and although it's unlikely, there's a chance if I convince them I'll be able to do it. I like to think I'm pretty good with words and can sell myself so I'm hopeful. If it turns out I can't, I'm gonna be stuck on this economics course I intensely dislike and struggle with it for another 2 years, no doubt many more stress induced panic "apply to everything stupid" fits.

This Saturday is a pretty big day. It will mark 17 years since my older sister died. She was 16 and had just finished exams, had her prom, and was on holiday with her friend and her friend's parents when she got meningitis. They realised the seriousness too late, she got to the hospital too late and the doctors couldn't treat her before it was too late. She was such a beautiful, kind, caring, sensible, responsible and hardworking girl and me being only a child at the time, she was my idol. She'd take me with her on her paper rounds and I wanted to grow up like her. Not a week goes by where I don't think about her, about the influence she would have had on me as I grew up. There's no doubt whatsoever that I would be a much better person and a better student if she wasn't taken from us. It's a selfish way to look at it, but sometimes I think if it was her or me that was still alive right now, she'd make people more happy and proud than I can.

Here's my message for those who are having a seriously hard time, in particular if you're considering the s-word:
Every one of us has incredible potential. Some get dealt a bad hand and can't realise this potential before they're taken from us. Just don't give up and fold. There's always another option.

It's posts like that mate, that are what this thread is all about.

I can't imagine how difficult it was for you to write that or how long it took to compose. A massive thanks from everyone who comes on here, whether they lurk or post x

 

[Deleted member 28206]

A whatsapp group should be set up for the lids on here I think.

 

[COYBL25]

A whatsapp group should be set up for the lids on here I think.

Possibly too public ?

 

[Deleted member 28206]

Possibly too public ?

More public than this thread!

 

[COYBL25]

More public than this thread!

Less respectful !

 

[Rob17896]

I think it was back in November or October last year when I made my first post in this thread. I got a lot of support which made a massive impact. I've decided to give a little update but I have a message at the end for anyone who is going through a really hard time.

Honestly, not a lot has changed with me. I still have only one friend, but as they say, one good friend is worth a hundred who are never there when you need them. I failed my first year of uni (I can pass if I complete and pass these make-up tasks due in August) which, when I found out, got me in quite a state. I was thinking up all kinds of far-fetched, knee-jerk plans (joining the RAF (couldn't apply anyway as I'm asthmatic), moving abroad) and despite it being at 4am, my friend stayed up and talked me down, kept me from applying to anything stupid that I'd regret.

Now I've started asking my university if I can transfer courses (without going back to the first year, because 9 grand is a lot), and although it's unlikely, there's a chance if I convince them I'll be able to do it. I like to think I'm pretty good with words and can sell myself so I'm hopeful. If it turns out I can't, I'm gonna be stuck on this economics course I intensely dislike and struggle with it for another 2 years, no doubt many more stress induced panic "apply to everything stupid" fits.

This Saturday is a pretty big day. It will mark 17 years since my older sister died. She was 16 and had just finished exams, had her prom, and was on holiday with her friend and her friend's parents when she got meningitis. They realised the seriousness too late, she got to the hospital too late and the doctors couldn't treat her before it was too late. She was such a beautiful, kind, caring, sensible, responsible and hardworking girl and me being only a child at the time, she was my idol. She'd take me with her on her paper rounds and I wanted to grow up like her. Not a week goes by where I don't think about her, about the influence she would have had on me as I grew up. There's no doubt whatsoever that I would be a much better person and a better student if she wasn't taken from us. It's a selfish way to look at it, but sometimes I think if it was her or me that was still alive right now, she'd make people more happy and proud than I can.

Here's my message for those who are having a seriously hard time, in particular if you're considering the s-word:
Every one of us has incredible potential. Some get dealt a bad hand and can't realise this potential before they're taken from us. Just don't give up and fold. There's always another option.

My partner suffers inherited anxiety and depression. Made worse a couple of years ago when her younger sister with whom she was very close, took her own life. It has been a difficult time and I don't know if she will ever fully recover but one day at a time.

You should not worry about Uni. If we keep trying then something turns up. Just keep going. I am old enough to understand that many of us will hit situations where life seems pointless, but one day it changes. Clinical depression is a different matter and the best that can be done is constant support but often that is not enough, but we should all try if we know somebody in that situation.
By the way, one friend is enough and the only one you need is yourself. You can absolutely trust yourself and so be comfortable with who you are. The job etc is just stuff, not you.

 

[degsy]

rant time. not been too good past few days so taken a while to write this hope it makes sense. last thurs I met with the palliative care macmillan nurse and during that meet I learnt something that confused me a bit, the meaning of "terminal" came up and all that it means is the cancer cannot be cured. and when they say 2 months its just a random figure I think, still need to ask more hence why i'm confused. she even said she has a few she looks after who were diagnosed a year ago. so I think I have been going through this dying thing all wrong. I and everyone else have been waiting for me to go soon so I have been reluctant to make any plans or get involved with any family decisions etc . now I am of the mind to be like everyone else. everyone knows they are going to die but not when, so no one stops planning for the future just in case do they?
well that's what I am going to do from now on. someone on here in the beginning asked me if there was anything I wanted to do before I went and I said I hoped to last to go to the rally we go to every year well we go on thurs, to be honest I didn't think i'd make it thinking the way I did then. the doc said 2 month its nearly 3 month now. I have ordered tickets for the espanyol game and will be getting tickets for the spurs game soon. it's not going to be easy changing mindset but i'm going to give it a good go. going to feel a bit foolish as everyone is waiting for me to go but hope everyone understands.

Quite right too mate, although some of us who are older or in your case sick, have a fair Idea it will be sooner rather than later, nobody actually knows, so I keep making plans for 1 day, week, month, year in advance, I'm 'planning' to go to England some time in 2017, I'm also 'planning' to go for a few beers and a Chinese on Sat. night.
None, one or both of these things may or may not come to pass, but If you have no plans to look forward to...it might only be getting your daily dose of 'wtf *shakes head at kopite's foolishness' on the RAWK thread, (which I visit daily as it's pure comedy gold) what's the point of even getting out of bed.

You go for it, make the plans, do as much as you can and if you fancy a 'day off' doing nowt, well do that too...it's still a plan...But it's YOUR plan.

NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING...

 

[DualityNSNO]

I lost my optimism recently and slipped back to my 'I just want to stay in bed and not move' state.

 

[Groucho]

I lost my optimism recently and slipped back to my 'I just want to stay in bed and not move' state.

I don't know how true this is, but I'm told that a high protein diet is good for lifting your mood.

 

[DualityNSNO]

I don't know how true this is, but I'm told that a high protein diet is good for lifting your mood.

I eat quite well and drink protein shakes... I've not done it in the last 2 days though, maybe I should start again.

I also had a few beers yesterday and now just want a drink, and I hate feeling like this.

 

[Groucho]

I eat quite well and drink protein shakes... I've not done it in the last 2 days though, maybe I should start again.

I also had a few beers yesterday and now just want a drink, and I hate feeling like this.

That's withdrawal that mate.

Go carefully.

 

[kithnou]

I eat quite well and drink protein shakes... I've not done it in the last 2 days though, maybe I should start again.

I also had a few beers yesterday and now just want a drink, and I hate feeling like this.

You know, everyone ideally needs to customise the amount of protein we require on a daily basis. Men, in general, require around 150g. Vegetable based ideally. Check your shakes and work out how much you are getting. Willing to bet short of what is ideally required.

As for the beers, agree with @Groucho